To let 3 year old play downstairs for an hour or so at the weekend?

[GoldBar]

Would you let your three year old play downstairs for an hour or so at the weekend while you read upstairs in bed? With the video monitor on to keep an eye and some cereal and milk?

I'd have let DS watch tv in the living room without me at 3 (because we live in a flat) but not with food.

3 is a bit young OP. I would let them play in your room, or go downstairs and snooze on the couch. My 6 year old has recently started coming downstairs herself every now and then, and helps herself to cereal. We're not in a big house so can hear everything anyway. Saying that, I still have the fear that she will choke on something and I won't hear her!

I would for maybe 10 minutes if I was grabbing a quick shower, but I wouldn't be able to relax in bed with a book. It really depends on the child though - I have a 3.5 year old and he doesn't let me out of his sight for very long at the moment 😂

No. But I once put 3 year old DC in bed with me, put on Disney movies and let them eat biscuits for breakfast as I had a stomach bug. We got up within half an hour as I had milk spilt on the duvet, crumbs everywhere and biscuit mush on the headboard, DC and me.

I’m amazed at posters who assume that very young children can ‘learn’ to be safe in their own, not for any necessary reason, just because their parents are lazy and don’t really care enough to get up.

A 20 month old can still have an accident on the stairs, even if you’ve ‘taught’ them how to go up and down.

A three year old who has never attempted to climb anything or put anything in their mouths before is not guaranteed to never ever do that!

If you value your lie ins and laziness so much why did you even bother having dc?

Even if I was up, which I am now in case anyone’s verging on phoning social services 🙄, she can still climb the stairs - we had to teach her how to climb them, otherwise there definitely would have been accidents. Of course it doesn’t mean accidents don’t happen, but people of any age can fall down the stairs, I can’t be glued to her all day so we taught her how to do it. It’s a very rare luxury staying in bed, we’re usually up taking the older ones to football but it’s not on today so we sat in bed drinking our coffees - I don’t see the difference between that and sitting on the sofa? My kids all have free roam of the house all day, sometimes I’ll be washing up and my daughter goes up to her bedroom to play in there. They’re not unsupervised but yes I think it’s good for kids to be able to play without an adult standing two feet away

I think my DC were about 6 and 4 when we started doing this. Also, we have a No Eating On Your Own policy in case of choking - they both know what to do if the other one starts to choke (scream like hell for a grown up!). Mine looked at books/played in their respective bedrooms until the sun came up on their Gro clocks before that. I wonder how different that is really - we were a bedroom door away - but I suppose that there was only so much trouble they could each get into in their child-friendly rooms (no small toys, furniture screwed to the wall etc)

@zigzagbetty

No in case I doze off again

I agree with @zigzagbetty

Not a hope. That's insanely dangerous.

Part of it is that they play much better when I'm not there...No "Mummy, I want TV" or stuff like that. They have a doll's house and a car garage and that seems to keep them busy for ages when I'm not in the room. I quite like watching on the monitor.

The issue is the parents need for sleep. Perhaps later bedtimes for the child to help move forward their waking time.

If I need a lie in, I pop DS 3 in bed with me with the iPad and doze. Or I’ll sit on the sofa with a cuppa and let him get on and play.

I do leave him alone whilst getting washing out, cooking, cleaning, even showering sometimes but will shout down to check on him and pop back into the room regularly.

I wouldn’t leave him downstairs alone and whilst I’m upstairs in bed though.

@GoldBar it is good for children to play on their own, as long as they are happy and you can hear them, what’s the difference between laying in bed and cleaning the bathroom? Mumsnet seems to have a big issue with parents not ignoring all of their own wants and needs just to be a martyr, if you’re not martyring on why did you even bother having kids 🙄

*My kids all have free roam of the house all day, sometimes I’ll be washing up and my daughter goes up to her bedroom to play in there. They’re not unsupervised but yes I think it’s good for kids to be able to play without an adult standing two feet

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/boy-hangs-self-youtube-prank-copy-death-a7317946.html%3famp

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.dailystar.co.uk/news/latest-news/boy-10-accidentally-hangs-himself-21094146.amp

www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/law-and-order/10930029/Boy-accidentally-hanged-himself-after-creating-rope-device-to-watch-tablet-computer-from-bunk-bed.html

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/girl-11-accidentally-hanged-herself-17794453.amp

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5977095/amp/Tuxford-girl-six-accidentally-hanged-playing-two-skipping-ropes.html

These aren’t rare occurrences, I could have kept those sad links coming all day. Because if parents who didn’t supervise their dc properly.

They are your responsibility, if anything happens to them because you did not make sure they were safe then that will be on you, and only you,

but yes I think it’s good for kids to be able to play without an adult standing two feet away

I agree, not while 2 grown adults are in bed still and they're just wondering up and down.

No way. 3 is to young. I wouldn’t even trust my nearly 5 year old. Please just get up and sit and read on the sofa, you don’t need to be in bed surely?

I am appalled at a 20 month old climbing up and down stairs unsupervised though! DS is 3 and knows he has to wait for an adult to follow him before going up or down.

When mine were 3 they used to play in their room. But not downstairs. Youngest is 6 and a half now and goes downstairs, feeds the cats and gets himself his cereal. Not asked him to he just started doing it.

Argh letting a one year old climb up and downstairs on their own! No matter how well you teach them that is neglectful pure and simple.

No they don't @Kungfupanda67, most would have a stair gate on their stairs for a 1 year old. Nothing about being a martyr, but being responsible. When you clean the bathroom you just make sure they are somewhere safe, not freely wondering unless you can be certain that they can't reach anything they shouldn't, everything is secured to the walls so they can't pull it over, they can't grab anything they can choke on etc. No need to watch them constantly, but the need for a safe environment is a definite. Seen a lot of injuries in children who have just been left to it, it's sad.

If my two yr old wakes up super early like 5am often he will get out of bed and play in his room but quickly gets bored (his room is completely child proofed). I would not let him play on his own downstairs! If you are going to be watching them non stop on camera you might as well sit on sofa. I put kids tv on and say mummy is busy if I am doing something.

Absolutely. Mine were walking about at 10 months old so they were very independent. The house was childproofed but they were sensible. They wouldn't have turned the cooker on or investigated the sharp knives drawer. All cleaning products were stored on very high shelves.

@Rangoon

Absolutely. Mine were walking about at 10 months old so they were very independent. The house was childproofed but they were sensible. They wouldn't have turned the cooker on or investigated the sharp knives drawer. All cleaning products were stored on very high shelves.

At 10 months old.. you just KNEW they wouldn’t do anything dangerous wandering around the house unsupervised?

Honestly some of these dc are just lucky to be alive.

Yes. I think some people are missing the ability to assess risk and probability and that every child is different.

I mean - what if they child chokes? What are the chances of a three year old choking to death in the time it takes to get downstairs?

And what's to say if you were in the room you could stop that anyway?

It's like saying 'let's not let any child of any age out because what if they get knocked over by a bus, have an accident etc etc

There's a reason the snowflake generation phrase has emerged...

Going off some of this comments I’m honestly surprised some of you still have your children in your care. 😳 Some of these are down right neglectful. Why have children if you can’t even be bothered to get up and supervise them?