To let 3 year old play downstairs for an hour or so at the weekend?

[GoldBar]

Would you let your three year old play downstairs for an hour or so at the weekend while you read upstairs in bed? With the video monitor on to keep an eye and some cereal and milk?

Do you not have to go downstairs anyway to get the cereal and milk sorted?? Or is your kid doing that??

No, just read downstairs.

If you could 100% guarantee that you wouldn’t drop off back to sleep it would be fine. But you couldn’t, so no.

[quote Badbanana]@022828MAN hit a nerve did I?

Loving parents do supervise their three year olds closely.

And there is a world of difference between lazing around upstairs for an hour and leaving a room for a few moments where I’m assuming most responsible parents will personally make sure the environment is safer before leaving, even if for a few minutes.[/quote]
You didn't hit a nerve at all, no. But your choice of language is ridiculous. 'Loving parents do ABC' - I'm going to assume the OP loves her child, don't be so hyperbolic.
I'm sure there's things you choose to do with your children that other people definitely wouldn't do too.

For all the ones saying no, do you have you 3 year olds with you at all times then?!

They are 4 and 6 now but when they were 3, yes. And the 4 year old still needs constant supervision.

Absolutely not. My kids were early risers so was up at 5.30/6 am most mornings. Ex Dh and I would take turns at weekends to have a lie in, the other would go downstairs with them and lie on the sofa while they watched tv/played for a bit.

They are now 12 and 14 and I can’t drag the eldest out of bed. The youngest got up before me, went downstairs and played on the x box and made me a cup of tea as I’m not feeling well.

It doesn’t last forever and sometimes I kind of miss those times.

@Kungfupanda67

Yes my 20month old has been downstairs, and upstairs, for over an hour. I’ve been down to make coffee, popped down to get them a drink, my husband went down to make a coffee, she popped back upstairs to show up one of her happy land people, she’s played in her bedroom, and in her brother’s bedroom. She isn’t one of those kids who puts things in her mouth, she never has been. She can get upstairs if she wants to, but she wanted to go down and play:

I think the climbing of stairs unsupervised makes it even worse, tbh.

I don't really see the issue. When my children were young they didn't have small toys that would fit in their mouths, they didn't have food if left alone and the house is pretty child safe. Most dangerous activity would be going down the stairs in the first place. They would have free roam of the house (after 6am) and we were happy for them to go down and put the tv on. To me it's no different from having a shower or popping into the garden to hang washing out etc.

No, I’d go and lie on the sofa if too early.

You can never be 100% sure a 20 month old won't put something in their mouth. My 21 month old found one of his brothers toy syringes from the drs set the other day and he popped it into his mouth and the end came off! Luckily I was watching him and he spat it out but what if I hadn't been there?! The thought makes me physically sick. It sounds like you have older children which means there will be toys unsuitable for babies lying around.

20 month climbing up and down the stairs as they please and doing what they want downstairs, cripes. I'm quite relaxed, but that's appalling.

@Ohalrightthen we moved into this house 6 months ago and the way the stairs are made stair gates really dangerous, so we taught her how to go up and down the stairs safely.

My youngest also used to choke on food and once, if I hadn’t have been watching, he would no longer be here

Not a risk I would take for a bit of time in bed.

Not on a different floor of the house and with food. Otherwise absolutely, I don't believe DC should be attached at the hip our bedroom is next to the kids bedroom and I let my 3 and 5 year old play in there together. Don't think I would let them play alone downstairs though quite yet.

No way would I have done it with mine. Something bad would've happened within about five mins!

[quote Kungfupanda67]@Ohalrightthen we moved into this house 6 months ago and the way the stairs are made stair gates really dangerous, so we taught her how to go up and down the stairs safely.[/quote]
At 20 months? This just gets worse and worse, but as long as you get your lie-in, eh?

No . Why can’t you read in the same room ?

@NoIDontWatchLoveIsland

I never quite understand the children who from a very young age will just play alone with zero adult interaction for 30/40 mins plus.

It always sort of makes me feel they have just been ignored a lot or not often played with actively

I don’t think this is necessarily the case. Some children are just better at entertaining themselves than others. I think they come into the world like that. My baby will happily play by herself for quite a long time, and with me will concentrate for 20-30 minutes on the same activity. Not every time but very often. Obviously this might change as she gets older, but it’s definitely not because she’s just been left. When she was very new I used to sit right next to her while she lay on her mat looking at her toys. I’d feel too guilty even to leave her to make a cup of tea! After a while I realised that not only does she quite enjoy playing alone for a little bit, and get grumpy if she doesn’t get a little space from time to time, but it’s actually an important skill to be nurtured. Having said all this I leave the room only to do quick jobs etc., pop back in and out. She is still a baby!

Ah teaching them to go safely means they never have any accidents I suppose? That is bordering on neglectful, please get up with your child FFS.

Interesting , I was thinking about just this this morning. I woke up and could hear my 3yo wandering about downstairs.

I called out to him and he came up to me, usually he comes to me first. My question is - how do you stop them? He can open all the doors and climb over stair gates. If he wakes early before me and doesn't call out, how do I stop him going anywhere?

I think its fine. My 3yo plays downstairs by herself during the day, as sometimes i have to go upstairs to tidy or put washing away etc.
She plays in her room for about an hour each morning when she wakes up anyway.

There’s two of you there and you both left a 20 month old to their own devices for well over an hour?!! Not only that but you seem proud of your lazy, neglectful parenting. Shocking!

Mine wouldn’t choose to but she would be fine if she wanted to. She’ll play happily by herself while I’m doing other things and is naturally very cautious. Depends on the child.

I have twin 3 year olds (4 in a couple months) and we wouldn't be able to get away with this.

They aren't "glued" to me but unless you specifically tell them where you're going and how long you'll be gone they come looking for you (so if I need to go to thr bathroom I tell them and tell them to stay where they are and if anything happens come get me but my husband often forgets and just wanders off so 2 mi utes later they are shouting about the house looking for him)!

We do the take turns thing and I'm currently lying in bed while my husband has been up since 7, ill be up tomorrow.

I do leave them downstairs alone while I shower, but they get given explicit instructions of where I am and to come find me if they need anything. I tend to stick tv on so I know they will stay put.

OP in your specific situation I think I'd probably go downstairs and just lie on the couch to read while your 3yo plays, or have 19 minutes to myself before heading down. An hour feels a long time, but I also don't judge you for it, you know your own child.

I find these responses confounding! Both off my three year olds were very happy at that age with toys or books for an hour or so until I am ready to get up! But then, I guess that is our routine, so they know what is okay and safe.