To let 3 year old play downstairs for an hour or so at the weekend?

[GoldBar]

Would you let your three year old play downstairs for an hour or so at the weekend while you read upstairs in bed? With the video monitor on to keep an eye and some cereal and milk?

Definitely not, 3 is far too young.

Yes! Depending on the 3yo. One of my daughters wouldn’t have had it at all and definitely wouldn’t have played ball- she had to be with people- but my other one would have been fine and done it no problem.

I’m a lone parent and Dd either comes into bed with me to watch Peppa or Duggee on my phone, or we both get up.

When I’m up and about in the day she plays in her room while I’m downstairs, but we live in a 2 bed terrace so she’s not exactly far away!

I wouldn’t feel comfortable letting her go down on her own, I know I’d fall asleep again and wouldn’t hear immediately if she got into difficulty with something.

Leaving a 20-month-baby to play on their own is really shocking.

My eldest and second at that age I would for a bit but probably not an hour (not that they would have left me alone that long) but my third no way as he was and still is a climber and doesn't go for sitting still. I wouldn't leave them with any food though as chocking isn't noisy so I'd have been worried I wouldn't hear that.

I think you know your child and have to do what you feel comfortable with which, as your asking on here, I'd say isnt this situation. If you were comfortable with it I don't think you'd be asking.

20 months 🤯

The eating alone is the biggest issue I have. There is a difference between partial chocking where they cough and cough and cough, and actual chocking where they make no noise at all. You wouldn't see that on a monitor necessarily.

I have actually witnessed a child choking and it was terrifying, I was about 22 and I was with my friend at her sister's house. Her 3 year old was playing and eating something and then stopped playing and just stood frozen, wide eyed, didn't go to her Mum or Dad just stood there, and then the Mum figured out she wasn't breathing. The Dad held her upside down by her leg and whacked her back. Fortunately she spat out whatever it was lodged in her throat.

Just get out of bed, snuggle up on the sofa with your book. This time won't last forever and when your child is older yes you can do this, but not at 3.

@Badbanana

No.

Just some of the reasons:

Choking (on food or toys - it’s silent, if you slip back in to sleep there would be no noise to alert you)

Climbing on and falling off furniture (or horrifically pulling something and ending up crushed under it like a tv/bookcase etc)

Playing with something they shouldn’t, like electric sockets/cables/turning on hobs.

But if you don’t really like having a three year old then carry on neglecting them I guess.

What a ridiculous statement to end your comment with. Firstly - children can choke in 3 minutes. So by your logic if I'm simply hanging washing or taking a dump I have to take my DD with me? Secondly, you don't know the room isn't child proofed, so no chance of crushing or electrocuting themselves. The sarky neglect comments are pathetic.

Mine would have just come and found me 😂

[quote TheRuleofStix]@Ohalrightthen I don’t agree they were stupid. It was a different time. All kids played out at that age and there was far less traffic so risks were much smaller. I played in the street and at the nearby park with friends and siblings from the age of 5.

Parents over supervise nowadays. Kids need to learn independence and many have few if no independent skills even by secondary school (I’m a teacher).

Having said all that, 3 is too young![/quote]
I grew up in that age too, but it wasn’t safer. We just didn’t hear about the awful things happening to children.

Two dc from our village drowned because they were too young to swim and were left in the care of older siblings who had no concept of how to look after a toddler (this happened years apart).

My group of friend were flashed and chased by a man who was a local boogeyman at the school. Parents still sent us out to the park with no supervision.

I often think the past benign neglect is looked at through very rose tinted glasses, all the threats were still there, we just didn’t have the connectivity to know about them.

Your not even 2 year old has been playing downstairs on her own @Kungfupanda67?!? What if she puts something in her mouth as they all do at that age?

No OP 3 is too young. As someone else said, early mornings are part and parcel of parenting unfortunately.

No. I come down and doze on the sofa while they watch cbeebies on iplayer. I always give them a glass of milk and a brioche first then snuggle then we get breakfast a bit later on. We are getting up at 4.45/5ish at the moment so it is a killer but even though my 3 year old is sensible I wouldn't let him.

@Kungfupanda67 You really let your 1year old play on their own downstairs for and hour and a half? I’m a pretty chill parent but just the thought of that stresses me out.

No way! 3 year is way too young and needs constant supervision, in my opinion.
I don't think I could do that with my 5 year old and relax upstairs.

Don’t go to the toilet when they are eating?

@022828MAN hit a nerve did I?

Loving parents do supervise their three year olds closely.

And there is a world of difference between lazing around upstairs for an hour and leaving a room for a few moments where I’m assuming most responsible parents will personally make sure the environment is safer before leaving, even if for a few minutes.

If you can hear her and have the video monitor on I would think it's ok but to be honest i would just get up.

Yes, our 3yr old did this but with sibling around. We've prob done this since they were 3/4 yr old ish. 3 kids now.

They get their own breakfast and entertain themselves for a while. Bliss

I never quite understand the children who from a very young age will just play alone with zero adult interaction for 30/40 mins plus.

It always sort of makes me feel they have just been ignored a lot or not often played with actively

Me and DH take it in turns on the weekend (I get up with the kids on sat, him on Sunday) so we both get a bit of a lie in - till about 9am. I wouldn’t leave my kids alone downstairs with a bowl of milk and cereal, how sad. We both work so for us it’s our time to spend some quality time with them. If I want to read I do it in the evening

My 6 and 3 year old are downstairs playing on their own right now, I’ll probably give them about half an hour or until I don’t like what I can hear - if it goes too quiet or they’re squabbling I’ll go down (at the moment I can hear them chatting and building a train track).

I sometimes let my eldest play on his own downstairs for a bit aged 3 - if I was breastfeeding the youngest sometimes he’d wander off, I remember going down and finding he’d completed all his jigsaws. He was however very sensible and not one to climb, jump, or do anything daft.

Mine does, the room has a baby gate on and theres nothing out he can cause mischief on. I do put the tv on for him though and he doesnt have food. He also plays better without an adult in the room.

I think it depends on the child

Yes my 20month old has been downstairs, and upstairs, for over an hour. I’ve been down to make coffee, popped down to get them a drink, my husband went down to make a coffee, she popped back upstairs to show up one of her happy land people, she’s played in her bedroom, and in her brother’s bedroom. She isn’t one of those kids who puts things in her mouth, she never has been. She can get upstairs if she wants to, but she wanted to go down and play:

Nope- but intrigued how to get a three year old to detach for that long, I can’t make it to the loo

20 months.... you are joking right?!