To be pissed off about the mum who brought her sick kid into school?

[Crumpetsforthequeen]

OK so this is probably because it's 1am and I've had about an hours sleep (again!) but I'm super pissed off. Not sure if this is so much an aibu but more of a rant.

So the first day DD7 goes back to school everything goes well, it's a bit weird but I'm glad she has a good day, comes to pick up and one of the mums who couldn't give a toss about anyone else and never has rocks up sick as a dog.

Naturally everyone immediately moves away from her and she laughs and says oh it's just a cold, xyz has it too but i need the rest as I'm goin out on the piss this weekend!

Xyz is in DD's class, lo and behold out he comes full of cold. Then the rest of the class got sick, DD brought it home.

She got sick, DH got sick, DS1 got sick, I got sick. Here is we're I'm pissed off.

So because she couldn't be arsed to look after her sick child because she needed the rest so that she could go out drinking, what she doesn't realise is that mine then developed into a chest infection that I'm still fighting, DH had to take time off work because they wouldn't let him come back until he had the all clear so missed out on wages, DS is still sick and before this he was FINALLY sleeping through the night, now since he's been sick he's waking up at all hours of the night so we've had fuck all sleep which has made it harder to get over this cold.

I'm already on the vulnerable list, if I caught covid right now I'd be screwed, but ya know because she wanted a bit of sleep so she could get drunk, fuck the consequences! 🙄

Pissed off with the school for allowing him to come in when he was obviously sick and pissed off with her for thinking this shit is OK.

I know eventually it was gonna happen, especially with the kids being off for so long but to stand there and laugh and act like it's no big deal? I feel sorry for her kid who had to go in sick.

Sorry rant over, no idea if any of that made any sense just sick of mums thinking it's OK to send their kids in sick, have some common curtesy for others, especially during a pandemic.

So yeah aibu for feeling all of that or am I being a bit over sensitive because I'm exhausted? (and sick)

At our school, you can pass birthday invites etc via the teacher. Maybe just write down how this affected you without a signature and ask the mum to think about others next time.

Yabu. It was a cold, schools and workplaces are full of them and people don't need to stay at home due to a cold.

Sorry but you'll have to get used to this, it happens every winter!

You definitely aren’t BU for feeling that and I hope you all feel better asap

YANBU.

This is exactly the issue with kids going to school sick and adults going to work sick: just because they are happy to go in, sod those who might catch it and have it turn into something worse.

Covid or Flu it's a bloody piss take.

YANBU OP.

I hate this ridiculous British attitude of ‘its only a cold’ so I’ll go to work/school/hobby club and infect everyone else because ‘it’s only a cold’.

Fucking hell! Hasn't COVID taught you silly people anything? How many of you haven’t had a cold since March?

Some people are more vulnerable to horrible complications when they’re sick. If we actually convinced people to stay home when they’ve got a cold, they’ll be fewer colds being passed on and therefore, fewer days off sick overall.

When I managed a large team I made it clear that staff should stay off when they were unwell and rest. It led to fewer sickness absences overall because staff got better quicker and didn’t pass their germs onto the other team members.

It’s not rocket science!

Found this really useful

My school would be bollocking me if I kept mine off for a cold

Whether it was “just” a cold or something worse I wish people didn’t go out of the door

Every year I get something, some times twice. I seem to pick up a cold if someone sneezes in the next street and every time I end up at my GPS asking for antibiotics which they say no to. Then I carry on. Not getting any better for a week or 10 days Then I get a chest infection and I have to go back to my gp who listens to my lungs then gives me antibiotics to get rid of the infection. All because someone thinks it is just a cold and they are well again 24 hours later.

This woman was clearly an a**hole.

You just hope she gets too sick to go out.

’When I managed a large team I made it clear that staff should stay off when they were unwell and rest. It led to fewer sickness absences overall because staff got better quicker and didn’t pass their germs onto the other team members.’

Most workplaces don’t have that attitude. Most schools don’t either.

I kept both my kids off for two days each with a cold because I was worried what people would think if I sent them back. But they were fine after one and last year I would probably have sent them on the first day.

I've never faced an objection when I've kept my DDs off school with bad colds for a day or two, I've always found them reasonable about it. But then, it's a very rare event, as they're both very healthy and have a good attendance record normally, so that's probably the reason why.

There are probably issues if it happens too often, as there might be suspicions that the absences aren't justified.

I have a kid with cystic fibrosis who needed hospitalization almost every time he caught a cold he missed weeks of school recovering. Every cold went to his chest and caused further lung damage which could have been avoided and now there are amazing new drugs for many people with CF the damage has already been done. Best ever attendance, given that when he was in hospital meant he was still marked as present as he was attending hospital school, was 60%. It's really horrible to drag sick kids to school and share it around but thats exactly what parents are told to do, fines are issues for non-attendance and sod the kids and families who are fragile. Sadly our little people are being indoctrinated into a system where illness is not allowed.

If every child who had a cold was off, there would be very few children in, especially after 6 months lockdown. My son caught a cold from his friend in the second week. I still sent him in. It was clearly a cold and not covid. He was fine, just a bit snotty. But people need to be extra aware of others on the playground and stay far away if they are ill.

It depends, how sick. Children need to be exposed to colds and coughs to build resilience.

My twins both came down with a cold virus the first couple of days of being back in school and passed it onto my husband who is still not 100% several days later but has still continued to work. You can't keep a kid off school just cos they have a cold. I never kept mine off, they went in and probably passed it on to others too. I knew it was very very unlikely to be Covid due to following the government guidelines and so in they went. Life goes on!!

If every child who had a cold was off, there would be very few children in, especially after 6 months lockdown.

This. Sorry YABU.

It all sounds very dramatic. I still can't work out how you all knew which DC spread germs. Yes many noticed the accused had a cold but did you scan the other 26/27 DC for runny noses as they passed?

Covid or no Covid I don't think anyone should send their children into school if they are unwell - even if it is 'just' a cold. Poor kids

The mother involved sounds awful. But you cannot keep your child off school every time they have sniffles or a cold. Mine would have been absent from primary school from mid September to about March if I'd done that!
Equally I'd lose my job if I was off every time I had a cold. I'm a teacher, so I catch a lot of colds.

I wonder if she has a drinking problem? Frequent binge drinking could be as much of a problem as drinking every night, if she can't stop than it's well on the way. Of course she might just be going dancing...

@notangelinajolie

Covid or no Covid I don't think anyone should send their children into school if they are unwell - even if it is 'just' a cold. Poor kids

I keep DS home if unwell with a cold for a day or two, but not if he just has a cold but is well enough for school.

Agree op but we have been told to send them in with a cold.

This is a tough one. My SIl visited with a cold last week which my 2.5 year old and 10 month old now have and between them coughing and crying all night I am getting a couple of hours sleep. I’ve had to take my daughter for a test so she can go to nursery and my son has a long awaited allergy appointment at the hospital tomorrow which I may have to cancel as he’s coughing I’m pretty angry about it all right now.

But, on the other hand if I couldn’t take my children out when they had a cough / cold I wouldn’t be leaving the house until March as they just get everything and pass it back and forth. Plus I think a cold is contagious 2-3 days before and for a few day’s after symptoms.

I feel your pain though as it’s hell with little ones.

My DS had this "cold" thing last week I kept him off as I 1. Know how vulnerable he is with his asthma so wanted to make sure he was home with constant access to his inhaler and

1. Know how vulnerable some of the other children/parents are so didn't want him to pass it on.

It's called parenting. YANBU. I won't keep him off for every cold but this one seems to be a particularly bad one. I hope you all feel better soon and get some sleep. She's selfish just because she wanted to go drinking

@notangelinajolie

Covid or no Covid I don't think anyone should send their children into school if they are unwell - even if it is 'just' a cold. Poor kids

There is a difference between a runny nose and feeling unwell.