To be angry with this shop assistant?

[MrsAvocet]

I'm in the market for a new bike and went into one of our local bike shops for a look today. I'd checked their website beforehand and thought they might have a few worth looking at. Things didn't get off to a great start when the assistant started talking to my DH and ignoring me, despite us both making it clear that it was me we were shopping for. But I wanted to see the bikes so let it go, and told the guy fairly precisely what I was looking for. He then took me over to a completely different style of bike and told me that this model "is very popular with ladies". I explained to him that it may well be, but its not the type of thing I am looking for, and restated my requirements. Seemingly grudgingly, he then showed me one of the bikes I had seen on the website but it wasn't quite right so I asked if there was anything else and he said no. I then asked if they'd stopped stocking one of the others that I'd seen online and he replied "No, we still have them, but the thing is, they're not cheap bikes so I didn't think there was any point showing them to you."
WTAF? Since when do shop assistants get to decide what a customer can spend? Admittedly they were at the top end of my price range but I'd had enough by now so said "Actually they are well within my budget but I think I will take my business elsewhere" and walked out. DH thinks I over reacted and says I didn't actually give a price range so the assistant wasn't to know. That's true, but I did say what level of components etc I was looking for which should have given him a fairly good idea what price point I was interested in. Plus I didn't want to see " all bikes between £X and £Y," I wanted to see the type of bike I described and I think he should have just shown me what I asked for and kept his judgements to himself. I think I actually reacted fairly calmly! I rarely spend much on myself and have been saving for this bike for quite a while so I was looking forward to going shopping but I left feeling quite upset.
So, was my reaction reasonable or not?

Wow, that’s so cheeky, on many levels! YANBU to be upset & annoyed.

Absolutely reasonable. Shop assistants should exercise their sexism and their prejudice on their own time - just like every other professional.

That's why I ended up shopping at one car yard as opposed to the other two I'd initially preferred.

Yes you were reasonable I would have been outside on the phone to the manager or head office telling them the sexist twat they hired cost them a sale

He should have asked you what your price range was. He obviously has women down as not serious cyclists. His whole attitude was wrong from the start. Lesson learnt for him.

Sounds like a plonker, but unless he’s the owner or on commission, it’s probably no skin off his nose. Complain/leave a bad review. I’ve had it from car sellers before.

I think you were quite right. Years ago we went into a shop to buy new flooring. We were completely ignored and then after asking were shown only one thing 'nothing else would suit you'. Clearly didn't think we had the money to spend. We did and we were not dressed scruffily just not the usual middle aged middle class people who shopped in this particular shop at the time. Even though they do have nice things we've never set foot back in or spent any money with them in last 8 years. Bad service. Oh and the speaking to the man not the woman would have been enough for me to just leave them as well.

You were perfectly reasonable

Absolutely not unreasonable op! I think you were restrained.

I have had the same thing when buying a car, bloke spoke to do to answer every question (which I asked and dp didn't even bloody drive at the time!) he kept saying, 'this is nice and cheap, I'll try and get it cheap for you'. I left withoit purchase. I had never given him a price bracket and he just assumed I was poor.

I've walked out of a local bike shop for similar reasons. I went to one a mile further away and the guy was lovely so brought my bike there.

The bike shop I walked out of sells accessories plus does servicing and repairs but I've never used them. I've also told everyone I know not to use them and have directed them to other independents and chains were the assistants are not sexist a-holes.

I had exactly the same in a furniture shop because i went in with my 3 young children, the assistant was so rude to me, saying they didnt do finance etc and that oak furniture was very expensive, i was livid, got the kids and the husband and advised i didnt need finance i had the money in the bank and that i wanted to get everything for the downstairs but she could now say goodbye to a sale from me!, went to oak furniture land and spent my 3k there instead!, there is no reason to be rude fro assistants at all its so annoying. You kept your cool welk i think!

definitely no an overreaction-maybe call the manager about it-how rude

He sounds like a twat, I would have done the same.

I've had the same thing when car shopping - my DH doesnt even drive.

Yanbu ok at all.
I'd email the manager and recount your experience.

YANBU at all!
Go all Pretty Woman on him and ride your new bike past the store, and say "big mistake."

Ex manager here. I'd be mortified if one of my staff treated someone like that- I'd want to know.

YANBU, I'd do the same.

Don’t blame you at all. Sounds like the car salesman who told me he had a nice brown car I might like, after I’d given him a spec for what I was looking for. Colour was not mentioned. I hope you found what you were looking for somewhere else.

This the reason why online retailing and self service checkouts are dominating and will continue to do so - as a youngish looking mixed race woman (who often has had a lot of disposable income and enjoys shopping/going out ) I’ve been on the receiving end of patronising/rude comments so often I automatically now go for the “shopping option with the least social interaction to avoid hassle or microaggressions”

you definitely did the right thing, hope you can get a bike elsewhere! and your dp doesn't see the aggression as he's got his privileged goggles on

Well done for standing up for yourself, op.
I had similar in a carpet shop. Went in and explained we needed to carpet a 2 bed flat completely. The sales man asked if there was a carpet being removed and I said no, it's a council flat we are moving into so comes completely bare. He Said "let me stop you there, can you afford this?" I was so shocked, I couldn't believe it. Both me and dh just turned around and left and when he called after us asking where we were going, we said to another carpet shop who isn't going to judge.
It still winds me up just thinking about it now. Bloody awful

Find it somewhere else and then inform the shop!

(I can be petty)

I think that's appalling in this day and age.

Yanbu.
I'd email the manager/owner and tell them of your experience. I'd also put a review on-line.

I had this once at Dyson. We asked to look at a certain model and the assistant was reluntant to show us. We were in normal clothes and not scruffy in any sense. Before she went to get it she said "You do reaslie this costs £300?" I was like, "Very aware, thank you". Cheeky cow.

She didn't get our business in her store, we walked down the road and bought it from John Lewis.

I think i would have persisted with him to get the bike i wanted, asked him to get the more expensive one for me to look at and taken my time humming and haa-ing and then at the end given him a long lecture on everything he did wrong

I walked out of a bed shop for the opposite reason. The sales assistant basically told me that the beds (within my limited budget) that I was looking at were crap and I should be buying a much more expensive one.

YANBU at all. I was raging on your behalf reading your post!!!! I think you were fairly calm in your response.

Blatant sexism.

This shit needs calling out every single time.