Husband has called the police on our neighbours, have we done the right thing?

[Ninjamomma]

DH and I were outside collecting birthday presents from the car and heard our female neighbour from across the street screaming. I couldn't make out everything she was saying but she was historical and we definitely heard "leave me alone" and "I've done nothing wrong" and things being thrown about

I didn't know what to do but DH went straight over and knocked the door - female neighbour came to the door, cracked it open slightly, DH asked If she was OK, she she she was fine and shut the door.

We both didn't feel satisfied so DH has called the police. They are on their way and I'm sat here wondering if we have done the right thing

I'm worried we may have caused tension now with them however I couldn't live with myself If something untoward is going on and I had just turned a blind eye

Have we overstepped our mark?

You did absolutely the right thing. A couple of years ago a young woman was heard screaming for her life but her neighbours did nothing because they 'didn' t like to interfere'. She was found dead the next day leaving behind a 10 year old son! If they had called the Police even to make a complaint about the noise she might have been saved! So don't regret it for a moment! Plus your neighbour will know that you did something that might have saved her!

40yrs ago I was abused horrifically by my partner, I was beaten all day once and throttled and I was 20yrs old and 8months pregnant. Reading this post and all of the comments made me realise, not once did anyone call the police or come to help. Please please please, even if its a false alarm, ring the police. Better to be safe than sorry. I was so terrified.

Personally I'd leave it now.

I've called the police on two houses that I heard loud voices in the past and don't feel bad. Better safe than sorry.

BytheRules62, I'm so sorry for the horrifying ordeal that you went through
How are you?

Our upstairs neighbour called the police once and they knocked the door in my partner was stood over me with a knife I didn’t know it was the neighbour until years later when I bumped into him in town and we talked and he told me. It’s always the right thing to do

Before I met my group of friends their school friend was murdered by her partner. It's 19 since it happened and they are all still haunted by her passing.
I've been a victim and I unfortunately no one ever called the police for me so it went on longer than it had to.
The world needs more neighbours like you OP x

OP read your update. Whether the content of the letters is true or not I'd say she could use a friend.
xx

Well done, very brave and yes it was/is the right thing.

I think that you did the right thing as you could have ignored it and it may have been nothing but someone could also have been really hurt and that's no good for anyone ?

You’ve done the right thing OP. I grew up in a household where DV was a regular occurrence . I wish someone would of intervened ❤️

@toobloominghot my friend was killed by her partner 10 years ago, he might be out of prison now. The police were called often were all learned after, it’s so horrific.

Heffalooomia. It was kind of you to ask. It was a long time ago. My biggest regret is that I didn't have him charged for the injuries he inflicted on me over the time I was with him. He got away with the crimes he committed and moved on to another poor woman. Thank god for the change in the laws.

You did the right thing.

Ps used to be a child protection minute taker and now they (police) can prosecute the abuser without the consent of the victim if there is clear evidence of abuse (it was about 3 years ago & I can't remember the finite /vertabim details but this was the essence of it...).
To anyone who is uncertain about their partner there is also Clare's law in which you are able to look up previous offences of a partner (applies to men and women apparently) x

@nicegirl73 I'm so sorry for your loss. It's so incredibly sad xx

I'd leave it now - just smile and wave naturally when you see them next. You don't want the whole neighbourly relations built on one incident. (Or to start a correspondence).

In a previous flat I heard banging, what sounded like someone being thrown about, shouting, swearing, etc. I called the police. Everything was fine, it was a shitfaced couple of friends, both men, and the police thanked me for my concerns.

I've called the police on a man who was threatening his wife/girlfriend in the street.

And years and years before that when I was about 14 or 15 I was having a day out with friends in London. We were all in a photo booth for the obligatory "let's all pull faces" group photo when we were trapped in their by a couple of blokes who were telling us the things they wanted to do to us and would do to us. We were trying to get out and making noise, the booth was in a busy place leading to the main part of a tube station and people were just walking past. Grown-up fucking men just walking past and leaving us to whatever might have happened. Something broke in me as I watched them walking past when I was trying to get through the arms holding me back and I somehow my anger gave me the power to properly push past them at which point I was screaming at the men - who all carried on walking looking embarrassed but being totally British about it and holding their briefcases to them - "What is wrong with you, we're young girls, why would you just walk away like that!" and more. Me bursting out and screaming blue murder made the blokes who were holding us in walk away and everything was fine. Everything probably would have been fine anyway and they were just being nasty creepy shits but it was horrible. I would never, ever ignore a cry for help even if I wasn't sure because you never know when you are saving a life.

Yep right right
I been through dv and I would also say the same thing with my ex calling me a grass behind me

I once called the police when I saw a bloke slapping a woman about in the street that I was driving down. I was shaking but I hope I saved her from a beating or something worse. I can still see her terrified face. None of us should turn a blind eye

When i was in that position someone calling the police may have got me out earlier not when i was left with poor eyesight after a beating. Do it !

OP you cried for AN HOUR over a thank you card? That’s the best part of this story hahaha.

I'd put a note through their door rather than talking to them. You don't want to embarrass them. And I'd let her know my own history of eating disorders and offer support/a chat if she ever needs it.

You did the right thing. Years ago my dp and I called the police when we saw an acquaintance's daughter being dragged by the hair through the park by her boyfriend late one night. They didn't know it was us, but the next time we saw the mum she was complaining that people should mind their own business and it had caused problems in her daughter's relationship. A very dysfunctional family. We don't regret it though.

More recently, I lived next door to a couple who were always having violent rows in the middle of the night. Someone always called the police, usually the woman's family who lived over the road. Eventually, they persuaded her to leave him.

We have called the police when overheard rows are a cause for concern. Too many women are murdered during domestics. They are helpless and need our support. Even if there is no outcome, the aggressor may think twice, knowing the community is listening.

You have definitely done the right thing, it may be nothing or it may be something major, you and your husband sound like you are good people and I hope everything turns out to be ok.