To be so fucking sick of living according to my neighbours routine ?!

[MrsA2015]

End of Terrace Victorian Victorian property converted into two flats, I’m on ground floor. Upstairs has 3 children 1-11 the noise from that is a whole other thread.

What’s really getting to be at the moment is the constant praying/chanting/pastor sessions (online) at 11pm on the dot since Easter Sunday. Frigging sick and tired of listening to it and the 6:45am Sunday wake up and what I’m guessing is pre-church family LOUD prayer session, then 20min of shrieking kids In the shared hall way that’s backed into my bedroom.

It’s constant and relentless, droning monotone voices, deliverance from the depths of hell? They’ll need saving from the depths of my damn shredded nerves before that.

I’m so so tired.

Every Saturday night I’m kept awake by late night cooking and filled with dread as I count down the hours to following morning.

39+4 weeks pregnant and at my wits end.

Yes I’ve spoken to them.
Yes I’ve reported.
Yes I’ve BEGGED for some peace.
No can’t move out.
No have nowhere else to stay.

Yes I’m crying desperately as I’m petrified already of the sleep deprivation to come coupled with knowing I’ve got these inconsiderate arseholes upstairs.

Ugh, I had upstairs neighbours like that. And they had laminate flooring and the DC kept dropping marbles on the floor - almost 24/7. Recorded it, reported it - nothing - I was told that children make a noise and I have to live with it.

My solution? I bought a CD with bagpipe music, turned my speakers up against the wall and played it on full blast for at least an hour. After that I would generally get a day or so of peace and quiet 'till it started up again. Queue the bagpipe music again.

You'll get your own back soon enough with a screaming baby downstairs day and night.....

So we’ve established that they don’t give a flying fuck about disruption to your life with a newborn bit you’ve not responded to many people asking why you can’t move?

Why assume all babies scream day and night? Not very positive vibes to give a soon to be mum. If babies are fed, changed and bathed, taken out in the fresh air and cuddled but not handed around like a bag of sweets, they should have no reason to cry unless they have colic. A phone call to your doctor or visit to pharmacist will sort it out.
There is no need to pick babies up every five minutes and tiny babies like to be wrapped with their arms inside for the first few weeks. Being born into a bright, noisy world after being confined in a womb is a big shock. Milk, sleep, being cuddled (esp by mum) and being bathed and changed is all they need at first.

Not sure what to suggest as you don't want to make noise to shock them into being considerate and you don't want to move (I think you can move as you haven't given reasons for why you can't).

Couldn't you do a friends thing where u get a big handled broom like the old man did and bang on the ceiling every single time they do it. Or do some late night drilling ...that may do the trick ...

If their is nothing your freeholders can do for you have you tried the council, otherwise if she is so religious I think you are going to have to use this to your advantage.Use some religious quotes about the importance of being a good neighbour etc. especially one that's pregnant. You really don't need this try to do some relaxation exercises the worst thing is to get your blood pressure up, I know how difficult it is I have put up with it most of my life. Good luck

OP you sound like a saint. Hopefully you can pursue this through the EH people whilst preparing to move.

That sounds awful. Sleep is a basic human right and sleep deprivation akin to torture. I wonder if these apparently religious people are aware of the suffering they are causing. You have aright to the peaceful enjoyment of your home and the Landlord is responsible for managing both properties. Noise after 11pm is noise nuisance and anti social behaviour and the private landlord is responsible for enforcing the terms of the lease which probably has clauses about no music, singing (which would include chanting) after and before certain hours. Are the neighbours inviting others into their home and hosting late night religious ceremonies? This may also be a breach of the lease. There should also be adequate sound insulation between the two flats or they should not be approved for letting by the Council. You can report the Landlord to the Council for failure to manage which means they would have to rescind their agreement with him and then request alternative accommodation from the Council. Can you record the noise levels and keep a diary and copy of all correspondence with the Council, Private Landlord and tenant above? All of these have responsibilities which are not being carried out. Also can you get a Doctors letter confirming the threat to your health and well-being? This might assist in getting the Council to move you. You can take all the evidence to the local councillor, MP and citizens advice bureau and request their help. I hope this gets resolved for you.

OP Your situation sounds horrible. You said you were in SE London and a private tenant through council? I have an ex-council flat in Southwark and had a major problem with the flat some years ago, I kept calling the council but I was just fobbed off and told it's my problem as I was a lease holder. This went on for few years until the situation took a turn to worse. I contacted a local solicitor and couldn't believe how quickly my problem was starting to resolve, once he was working on it. I was appointed a contact person through the council who made things happen but it was ridiculous that I only was able to contact him after my solicitor had issued a threat that the council will be taken to court.

I will PM you his details next. Hope that's ok.

Yanbu OP, that sounds horrendous I really feel for you.

I know you shouldn't have to move and its them at fault, but if its this stressful it may be worth cutting your losses and moving, even if you have to move out of London affordability wise, your wellbeing is worth more than this.

Beijing opera full blast with the speakers a few cm from your ceiling (their floor) works an absolute treat.

I had a very similar problem. Horrendous screaming, shouting, fighting and stamping on my ceiling at all hours of the evening and night, especially midnight onwards. I spoke to them nicely numerous times, went to mediation etc etc, tried everything etc; nothing worked. Because basically, they didn’t give a shit. Last resort now is to play that music all bloody night right under their bedroom floor. Best fu*king thing I ever did. Don’t know why I didn’t do it earlier.

Bottom line is you have to give them a taste of their own medicine. Inconvenience them the same way they inconvenience you. With my music, Each time they are considering kicking off, I want my neighbour to stop for a moment and reconsider whether it’s worth kicking off at 1am knowing full well retribution Is going to come their way straight after (cat wailing for the rest of the night).

This is what noise nuisance does to you, I am normally a very patient and considerate person but am forced to resort to this as the neighbours above me made mine and my children’s life hell. They just didnt give a shit, They would wake my kids up at midnight with their fighting and my kids end up sleep deprived when they went to school the next day.

Now when it happens, I get my kids to go to sleep in my bedroom, I sleep on the sofa and the music goes on for the rest of the night, speakers right under my ceiling.

If it doesn’t achieve anything else, it at least makes me feel a whole lot better. If they kick off during the day ( that’s normally in the living room) I blast heavy metal (same thing- speakers a cm from my ceiling ) and go out.

I can quite honestly say, in dealing with this matter, it’s the best solution I have come up with. Prior to this I was getting really upset, tearing my hair out, feeling totally and utterly impotent and helpless. Tried all the civilized routes to resolve this problem, nothing worked. Lived with it for 10 years and now it’s fight back time. Makes me feel a whole lot better.

Seems like not many people actually read my responses.

Yes I’ve spoken to them.

Yes I’ve been to the GP and built up letters and a case against them.

Yes I’ve lost my shit at them and had an almighty row.

I’ve invited her inside whilst her kids were running top speed the length of the house with the music on , to which she responded with sympathy but did nothing about.

I’ve contacted avenues to get me moved. I’m under the council in temporary accommodation but renting off a private agency, a long way to go about things but it just is how it is. Can’t afford to move out now as we have local commitments and would disrupt everything we’ve built up over the last 3 years.

No I don’t suspect child abuse.

I came on for a vent not for my own life to be dissected!

Ask them.for their phone number for emergency etc. And then everytime the chanting etc or if the late night noise is too much, just call them and say.
As far as the noise from children. That unfortunately is apartment life ! Its a risk we all take when living with upstairs neighbours.
Have you tried some white noise machine for yourself? Worked for me when my adult sin and his children came to stay with me. (I like my early nights)

Put a note under their door saying:

“Matthew 22: 30-40”

Then if they don’t get it play sex pistols, thrash metal, marlyn Manson, bat out of hell to your hearts content. They’ll probably start praying for you mind.

Isaiah 30:15 ESV / 93 helpful votes

For thus said the Lord God, the Holy One of Israel, “In returning and rest you shall be saved; in quietness and in trust shall be your strength.” But you were unwilling,

Also good.

Psalm 4:4
Be angry, and do not sin; ponder in your own hearts on your beds, and be silent. Selah

Exodus 14:14
The Lord will fight for you, and you have only to be silent

Isaiah 32:17
And the effect of righteousness will be peace, and the result of righteousness, quietness and trust forever

And finish off with
2 Timothy 3:16
All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness

And for those that have said they don’t believe that Christians can be like that I used to belong to churches that were. Apparently you had to breakthrough spiritually by shouting and praying as loudly and frequently as possible. Get up at 5am every day to pray. Pretty much chant monotonously to build yourself up. Etc. If you don’t pray earnestly enough you get told you don’t have enough faith.

Took me several years to recover from that. Thank goodness I left amd found a normal church. My sister thought I’d joined a cult (not sure she was wrong)

They could be part of a local church but it’s entirely possible they are watching streamed stuff from a bigger church elsewhere.

Quote the bible at them. It’s obviously the only language they understand.

Galatians 5:25 If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit.

Philippians 4:5 Let everyone see that you are considerate in all you do. Remember, the Lord is coming soon.

Corinthians 10:24 People should be concerned about others and not just about themselves.

Romans 2:8 But for those who are self-seeking and do not obey the truth, but obey unrighteousness, there will be wrath and fury.

And if the gentle approach doesn’t work:

Deuteronomy 23:1 No one whose testicles are crushed or whose penis is cut off shall be admitted to the assembly of the LORD.

Devil worshiping. Become a loud and devout satanist.

And play WAP on repeat.

Did this only start after Easter then? In which case, hopefully they will soon be getting back to their church building as these are now opening up. Hope so for your sake. Whenever you meet them in hallways and they say how are you, tell them that they are making you very ill. Their children will be at school now but when it's their 5.00 pm nap time make as much noise as you can so they cannot sleep and have to go to bed at a reasonable time.

Wow... Deuteronomy 23 should sort ‘em out! 😐

Wow, if it helps, I'm so sorry you are in this situation, I'm guessing they are not C of E ? If appealing to them directly did no good it must seem like you are trapped. Via the council can you look into doing a home swap ? Hope you get some resolution soon, and then you can enjoy your pregnancy and the baby. Good luck.

No it definitely doesn’t sound like a common Christian practice. Have to laugh at those eager to make out it is. Probably likely to be a religion that likes to put it more on show. Possibly Islam or Hindu.

-Sep-20 23:52:12
And for those that have said they don’t believe that Christians can be like that I used to belong to churches that were

In the church yes, a lot of religions tend to be noisy in their places of worship. But I’ve never heard of a large Christian family in the home doing it. I think it’s bizarre how people are trying to blame Christians. It really isn’t their practice.