To be so fucking sick of living according to my neighbours routine ?!

[MrsA2015]

End of Terrace Victorian Victorian property converted into two flats, I’m on ground floor. Upstairs has 3 children 1-11 the noise from that is a whole other thread.

What’s really getting to be at the moment is the constant praying/chanting/pastor sessions (online) at 11pm on the dot since Easter Sunday. Frigging sick and tired of listening to it and the 6:45am Sunday wake up and what I’m guessing is pre-church family LOUD prayer session, then 20min of shrieking kids In the shared hall way that’s backed into my bedroom.

It’s constant and relentless, droning monotone voices, deliverance from the depths of hell? They’ll need saving from the depths of my damn shredded nerves before that.

I’m so so tired.

Every Saturday night I’m kept awake by late night cooking and filled with dread as I count down the hours to following morning.

39+4 weeks pregnant and at my wits end.

Yes I’ve spoken to them.
Yes I’ve reported.
Yes I’ve BEGGED for some peace.
No can’t move out.
No have nowhere else to stay.

Yes I’m crying desperately as I’m petrified already of the sleep deprivation to come coupled with knowing I’ve got these inconsiderate arseholes upstairs.

I had similar next door when the store room over the shop was 'converted' in not a place where the shop owners played online games and Bollywood films until 2, 3, 4 am. Tried knocking on wall and putting letter through their door. Finally caught guy who leases the property and he said he'd soundproof the walls (which were bare brick)
He didn't, although plenty of banging and drilling went on. Contacted council EH dept. They sent a visitor to sort it. No noise any more. None.
I wish you luck and best wishes for the safe arrival of your baby.
I've had 5 and none of them kept me awake. Not all babies are criers so try not to get wound up about possible sleepless nights. Babies know when you're anxious and it affects them.
Be kind to yourself and get Environmental Health to sort the noise upstairs. 🤞💐

Sorry. Should read 'converted into a place where...'

As for fighting fire with fire, after months of suffering ,begging, ,reporting and complaining , we decided to retaliate after a 4 day party by borrowing DJ speakers and blasting music against the wall, WE got a visit from the noise people. The CF worked for the council!!!.

I don't understand why people can't just be considerate for others around them. Like you say you were brought up to be aware of your neighbours. Have you spoken with your GP? This is making you unwell. You can also take them to court with a private prosecution and it'd be good to have evidence you have been to the GP.
I think I'd go with the court option. If you win the neighbours are liable for the fees and sound like you have years of evidence against them.

@Lifeisgenerallyfun
The best answer, so funny!!

www.environmentlaw.org.uk/rte.asp?id=73

I don't know of any churches that would condone that kind of inconsiderate behaviour towards their neighbours or have services or meetings at such antisocial times. It sounds very unusual, unless they are on Zoom church meetings that are based in another country. Can you insulate your ceiling with anything? You'd probably need a friend to help. Hopefully with school starting back they might need the kids on more normal hours and rein it in a bit. Keep a record and report if it continues. Noise cancelling headphones are great but may not help you too much when the baby is born. Sleeping in the day could well be your friend then.

Well, a screaming new born all hours of the night will soon make them pay.

@woofmachine

As for fighting fire with fire, after months of suffering ,begging, ,reporting and complaining , we decided to retaliate after a 4 day party by borrowing DJ speakers and blasting music against the wall, WE got a visit from the noise people. The CF worked for the council!!!.

The nerve displayed here makes me so angry on your behalf!

@Prig

Unfortunately the people who would be able to pass a law which would be quite frankly life changing for many, are those who will never ever have to experience living in such accomodation for the duration of their lives.

"The House of Lords has held that tenants cannot generally invoke common law remedies against their landlords where premises have been let with inadequate sound insulation. The decision in London Borough of Southwark and Another v Mills and Others (House of Lords, 21 October 1999) acknowledges the plight of tenants living in multiple-occupied older premises where insulation is so poor that even ordinary sounds made by neighbours can be unbearable. But the House of Lords has clearly indicated that the economic implications of upgrading are such that any solution must come from the Government and Parliament."

In 1999 computer said no. Think what a difference it would have made if they'd said yes, given what the housing market has turned into since then (gold dust for landlords).

What @prig says.

There are lots of rules that landlords have to follow when letting a house or converting it into flats - the staircase has to be a minimum width, there have to be two closable doors between the loo and the kitchen, for example - but the most important thing, that of noise insulation being adequate, is ignored. We lived in flats where sound insulation was minimal, but in nearly all cases the neighbours tried to keep quiet. We were very lucky.

However it sounds like even with decent sound insulation, your neighbours would still be heard - and again I can't understand why that sort of behaviour isn't dealt with properly. It's not 'normal household noise' in your case.

I'm afraid the kids 5pm nap time would be my noisy bastard hour! Nice loud music and stick thumping into the ceiling. Pretty sure it could be an exercise regime. Why the hell should they sleep when you can't.

You say you have tried reporting them etc etc. Have you actually just tried to speak to them? And really get across just how much it is affecting you?

It's probably because they aren't allowed to sing /chant at church still due to Covid restrictions. Sounds horrid.

I'm afraid the kids 5pm nap time would be my noisy bastard hour!
Yes definitely put the music in blaring and go out for a hour do it every day until they notice.
You've got to fight fire with fire with these ignorant lot.
But seriously you really need to move as soon as you can think of your health .

Have you considered retro fit insulation, IE fit thick insulation and then plasterboard to your ceiling to cancel out noise, worth looking at.

Firstly I totally feel your pain, sleep deprivation is awful I'm going through it now with my inconsiderate horrible neighbour and I've screamed banged complained, he got evicted before lock down and I was told he was going by the 2nd Sept, well he had a van this morning and we were so happy we thought he'd gone, well the fucker has just turned up so who knows, anyway why don't you fight fire with fire eg play loud heavy metal every time they start if they make noise wait a bit and do same, you've tried to deal with it peacefully soooo!! ! ! I wish you all the luck in the world and hope its sorted before your baby is born.

Play hit me with yr rythem stick in the garden speakers blaring. Or vile rap music they might report you. Then explain to the police. They wont listen to reason you tried. Fight back

I’d be rapping on their door EVERY SINGLE TIME their noise goes past 11pm and before 7am. I would interrupt their prayer sessions if necessary. I would continue to be polite but add a lot of insistence that they are breaking the law, causing you stress, being unreasonable, etc etc.

I would also be doorstepping the council until they get so fed up with your visits (and tears) they actually send someone out to take action. If the council continues to lamely write letters that are being ignored, it might be worth a call to your friendly local police station to ask for their advice.

This family is completely out of order. They can pray 24/7 all they like but they aren’t being good Christians in their behaviour.

Been there & totally understand your situation. It really drags you down when it’s so relentless. YANBU but they are. Keep complaining & asking them to be more considerate. Sounds like they might eventually want a different home with more space for their kids - life sometimes has a funny way of ending a bad situation.

I’m a bit late to the party but wondered if they’ve ever received any ‘official correspondence’ about this? I had the same issue, often prayer groups were held in a house next to ours and for some reason every attendee felt the need to slam the door and gate when they arrived and left. I worked for the council at the time so out of desperation typed and posted a letter on headed paper that was worded very ambiguously saying that there had been complaints about noise and that there would be further action if this continued. I was shocked to find it actually worked!

Btw...on a side note, suggestions of calling ‘SS’ are utterly ridiculous. There would be absolutely no grounds for them to open a case based on noisy praying and kids being up late at night. As if they have the time or resources to even deal with that if they wanted to.

You have my sympathy OP...I can remember constantly being on edge waiting for the noise to start

Pull the 'offended' card: tell the council that their loud religious rituals are offensive to your own beliefs and that if they don't tell them to keep it down, you will assume they advocate said rituals and seek legal advice. Tell them you'll also go to the newspapers.

Wake them up in the middle of the fricken night! Play heavy metal when the chanting starts. Sounds as if they won't listen to reason so you have to be as extreme as them and they might get the message.

I am in the similar position as you but not pregnant but have an ASD child . my neighbours have four kids and honestly it is like living under clapham junction and the noise triggers my kid to have anxiety meltdowns no place where my child could have some quite time , not be able to concentrate on homework . I am not able to relax in my home on my days off . lockdown it was pretty bad . me and my kid had to listen to parents sounding off and swearing at each other on Christmas morning , the last straw for me was when their toilet leaked and trip my electric and I had no electric for two days , then it blown out my living room lights as the damped spread weeks later and then them filling up my bins with their rubbish , then they overfilled the bath again tripping my electric .
I have decided I am going to move next year but some one did give me some advice and it was to keep log of what I was hearing and score the noise level like 5 being the worse then report it to the landlord with my log . if moving is not option why not keep a log then hand it in . otherwise there soundproofing but that works out quite expensive. its awful I know but you going to have to work you way around it and don't let it fester . keep trying the landlord or council .

grifffendor, that’s horrible. I put up with years of deliberate noise and abuse from my neighbours, because I had an extension built. It was a wet room for my dying husband and what they did to us and put him through in the last stages of his life can only be described as torture. I have a daughter with SN and autism, so was trying to calm her amongst it all.

The only thing you can deal with easily is the bins. Get bin locks. They only open when the bin is tipped into the lorry.

Just reading your post and updates made me feel anxious, OP, so I can only imagine the horror of having to live through it.

Have you actually ever lost your shit with them though? Like bashed on their door down at 11pm and screamed at how much their noise is affecting you? Because it sounds like you've been really polite so far and sometimes in these situations you just need to fight fire with fire and totally scream blue murder. Cry, rage, do whatever you need to release the stress and make them understand just how upset you are. It might change things, it might not, but you will feel better afterwards!