To ask how many friends you have?

[thedaywewillremeber]

I was thinking today about it I’ve only got two. I occasionally chat to a few others but they aren’t friends. Has this changed as you got older? I used to a big group of friends till my mid 20’s

Good friends, just 1. However friends to socialise with, I could meet up for drinks/meal with another 4.

Ten but give of them live in other parts of the country now, so whilst we're in contact multiple times per week, I only see them in person a handful of times a year. I also have some work friends, acquaintances and partners of good friends who I am close to but only as a consequence of my friendship with their partner. DH probably has around half a dozen close friends, then a couple who live elsewhere, a few work/hobby friends. I think it's normal as you get older to not have the hoardes of friends you had in your twenties

About 50 I see on a regular basis. I have friends from childhood still and some I don’t see a lot because of distance/life as much but I will still see them when I can, do birthday cards etc.
I know I’m very lucky.

This has also made me think of when I went to the wedding of one of my bridesmaids. We grew up together and I'd consider her one of my two "best friends". During the photos she assembled "the girls" for a picture - her best friends. There were 8 of them and I wasn't included. I remember feeling pretty crushed by that. Sorry to derail the thread a bit OP!

About 15 close friends. These are people I socialise with as regularly as possible (some live at a distance) and could confide in. Of these, 5 are old school friends, 8 are colleagues (I’m a teacher so work in a very sociable workplace) and 2 are friends through hobbies/kids. On top of these, I have lots of cousins whom I’m also close to.

I do feel lucky to have lots of friends but I’ve also worked hard to sustain these friendships and feel that I need lots of people around me. DH is the opposite - has about 2 mates and is happy with that. We’re all different.

1. It really gets me down. The only people I chat to are DP and my mum.

I don't think I'm interesting enough for people to want to be friends with me. I don't drink which seems to be the only way my old friends socialise and I don't have any hobbies.

I'm hoping if my current pregnancy progresses healthily, then when they're born I'll meet some other mums and make a friend.

I've got 3 best friends who I speak to most days and another 8 good friends who I don't see as much as I'd like but would be there immediately if I needed them. All turned up to my last baby shower (apart from the boys!) and when I had problems with my husband a couple of years ago they all rallied round me. I also have about 10 "mum friends" who we do stuff with the kids together and ask for advice. Lots of acquaintances who I would be excited to bump into and have a little catch up with but would be very unlikely to call for a chat.

In my 20s I had maybe 50 good friends - we used to go on holidays and days/nights out in groups of 20-30, we spent lots of time together and chatted all day in group messages. But in the long run I've decided I'd much rather have a few close friends than millions that I cant always trust

Close friends - maybe 4 and probably another 5 or 6 I'd consider friends

@ShalomToYouJackie I'm sure you are interesting. I've not been able to drink for years (pregant-breastfeeding-pregnant again) and noone seems to think I've gone boring. If you join some baby groups you will definitely make mum friends and theyre the best kind when you have a newborn

10 friends - 4 of whom are close and 1 very best friend.
None from school. Known the others around 19 years.

Two. One from college, aged 16 (were both now in our 50’s) and one from when I was around age 30. Others have come and gone. I had a lovely friend who I lost contact with (my fault) which I regret but by and large, my sister is my best friend, as it were.

I have Aspergers. Late adult diagnosis. I’ve many “acquaintances” and none of them would guess, I think but those who know me well can see that I’m fine one to one, but get lost in a crowd. I can mask really well but as I’ve gotten older, can’t really be bothered. DH gets it so, I’m fine with my “small” life, socially 😊

Not as many as in my 20's! In my 30's now.

A mixture of people falling out, moving away. As for my 'last' 3 best friends. I socialised independently with each as they didn't know each other.

Knew all 3 for a minimum of 15 yrs. BF1 had an affair, used me as an excuse. I didn't know and when her husband found out, somehow it was my fault? Her family, including her parents stopped talking to me! To this day not sure how I made her have an affair that I didn't know about!!!
BF2 unfortunately was sectioned and a shadow of her former self, we only now keep in contact via social media.
BF3 completely ghosted me and blocked me from social media, and I have no idea why which still hurts.

I am wary now.

@Teal99

Zero close. One acquaintance. Saddo me.

Same as me, we can be saddos together 🙋🏼‍♀️

Probably about 4 I would call in the middle of the night to help me bury a body. Probably about another 5 I would call for a drink/meal

I have one best friend who I’m very close with but we live a couple of hours apart now. We talk most days. My best friend from school who lives on the other side of the world and I don’t talk to regularly, and a friend that I grew up with from childhood who I’m not that close to and speak to occasionally.

I’d love to have a small group of close friends who I see regularly but I think I’m too people fussy! If I don’t really connect with someone I find it hard to form a friendship.

I thought I had 3 good friends. Just had the worst 4 years of my life and not one was there for me. Not one. We swapped texts/calls occasionally but when push came to shove we were on our own. That said I’m still in touch with ‘friends’ from school but not in ‘they are there for me’ way.

I am now a fully paid up member of the Nil Poi Friends Club 😬 Clearly have vacancies to fill but I’m not sweating it to be honest. I’m friendly, honest, open and told I’m a generally nice person so I’m sure I’ll make some.

Actually my dog 🐶 is my friend. Knows when I’m sad, happy whatever. Always pleased to see me too 😬

Six proper friends. Two friends.from home, two from where I used to live and two from where I live now. They are the ones that I send birthday presents and cards to,.the ones that i go to in need, the ones that I want to talk to and be with. I've seen four of them since lockdown and been in regular contact with the other two. None of them are friends with each other.

Can't believe the amount of people who say zero and seem unhappy about it. That seems a real shame.

I have always invested in friendships - if I meet someone I like then I make the effort to be friends. I was single for most of my 20s so I guess I had the time and energy to build solid friendships.

I would say I'm always close friends with around 10-15 people, there's a core group who I've known for years then other people like work friends and friends of friends come and go.

I think real friendships don't need constant attention as everyone has busy lives and it's impossible to speak all the time. WhatsApp is great for checking in with each other and Zoom has been good to catch up with groups of people without leaving my front room.

None. No one likes me. No one has ever liked me.

Can't believe the amount of people who say zero and seem unhappy about it. That seems a real shame.

I thought that too. I said zero, but I am happy about it and it's by choice.

I used to have a good group of friends early 29s but then we all drifted and stopped speaking, I had a very best friend who got depressed and was really hard to be around even though I did try and support her so we have also drifted apart and I have another best friend that lives like 3 hours away so I don't see her either. I have another work friend who is early 20s and drops me the second she is back with her vile ex,so is still immature. I am early 30s now and I have never thought I needed friends but actually I sit here sometimes thinking I would love to go out but I actually have noone to go out with its really sad. I'm not sure if it's me and I am the common denominator but the friends I have not spoken to were because they done me slightly wrong so I end up cutting ties so maybe I shouldn't do that

Have about 5 or 6 good friends and a really nice friend who lives abroad .I think when you are younger you have more friends as you are growing up together ifyswim.2 or 3 good chums is better than 10 or 12 "fair weather" friends though!

None. Couple of acquaintances.
My DP doesn't even have acquaintances.

Loads. About 10 close friends, and loads of other people who I socialise with.

Wide I think sometimes you have to "Give " a lot to keep friends .My BF from School and I drifted apart .Made new chums but often have to call them (dont mind!) but this is what life is like people are busy and forget to call or whatever.