Or does DH just not care about risks....

[moonbebe]

Our daughter is 5 months old and born during lockdown.

Neither of our parents have held her.

My husband and I decided from the start we didn't want to take the risk, so people saw her from a distance.

Last month my husband returned to working from the office and has since developed a completely different attitude to the pandemic.

Whilst he's following the guidelines on social distancing, he keeps telling me it's 'not a scary place out there' and that I'm catastrophizing the risks.

He's now decided that it's time for us to allow our parents to hold and spend time "normally" with our daughter.

I however, don't!

I'm fed up of him telling me the risk to children is small!!
I just don't understand him.

I know numbers are low, but Covid is still there and I don't want to put out daughter at unnecessary risk for the sake of our parents wanting a cuddle.

We're in England and the guidance is still to social distance, even for babies, so if the risk was low to children they why not amend this (like Scotland)

My husband is 34 and I'm 33.
I have asthma (controlled) and inflammatory arthritis (not medicated with agreement of rheumatologist) and I'm
also concerned that if our daughter did catch it, that means I could, it worries me that I could be really ill and my biggest fear is been away from my daughter. 😔

I love our daughter so much and I just cannot tolerate the thought of absolutely anything happening to her.

Surely if I've got to make the decision to keep her safe, then allowing her grandparents to hold her (who all go to work every day and work around a lot more people than my husband does)
isn't a safe decision.

I don't know how me and DH are ever going to come to a decision on this because he thinks I'm being unreasonable and I think he is!!!

PND because she follows government guidance around 2m social distancing?! This thread is nuts.

OP I agree with the PP, this thread is nuts! So you follow all the guidelines around SD, go out responsibly in a pandemic and apparently your highly strung, have anxiety, need to see a GP. I responded earlier OP and said I didn't think this was the place to ask but even this is much more nuts than I expected!!

Many of the responses are about how awful it must be for the GPs, and how your DC must be missing something. This is not about how the GPs feel and your DC aren't missing out as you go out! I think you've been pretty restrained on here to have pages and pages of people saying 'your poor DC stuck inside for months, you have anxiety', I would have lost it by now!

Anyway good luck OP in what you decide!

It's really your choice.
Surely it's the choice of both parents, why should one have the final say? It's hardly surprising that some fathers become disinterested, maybe they soimply know their place in the hierarchy.
At some point we have to try and get back to as normal a life as possible, we can't live as troglodytes forever, there have always been dangers. I recall having to check under the car before every journey and crossing ny fingers when I turned on the ignition, the alternative was never to leave home.

I’m also with your husband sorry op. The risk to your daughter is so small as to be non existent.

How long are you planning to keep this up for?

YABVU and sound crazy.

PMD or something OP your not being normal even for these strange times. It's okay to ask for help.

PND

@moonbebe Do not let people make you feel shit for doing what you think is right for your baby.

You do not sound like you have PND, you sound like a new mum in challenging times with a lot of confusion trying to do best by her child.

We are still being cautious and doing it in small steps is the best way to go.

How much are your parents mixing with others, how serious are they taking it?

If they are taking it seriously and not acting as if this pandemic over, then maybe allow them some time outdoors having a cuddle, but it is for them you understand, your DD will be just as happy intersecting without actually being touched or hugged.

You do not need to do anything you are not comfortable with, you DC will be fine at 5 months just with mummy and daddy holding them , they don't need circles of people touching and holding them, they can interact without touching her. Allowing your parents in, is for them not your child.

It's not nice to throw PND around...

@Dillydallyingthrough

OP I agree with the PP, this thread is nuts! So you follow all the guidelines around SD, go out responsibly in a pandemic and apparently your highly strung, have anxiety, need to see a GP. I responded earlier OP and said I didn't think this was the place to ask but even this is much more nuts than I expected!!

Many of the responses are about how awful it must be for the GPs, and how your DC must be missing something. This is not about how the GPs feel and your DC aren't missing out as you go out! I think you've been pretty restrained on here to have pages and pages of people saying 'your poor DC stuck inside for months, you have anxiety', I would have lost it by now!

Anyway good luck OP in what you decide!

@Dillydallyingthrough

The thread is utterly bonkers! 🙄

@gypsywater

PND because she follows government guidance around 2m social distancing?! This thread is nuts.

Yep 🙄