AIBU to think teachers should not be teaching sex games to children?

[2fallsagain]

Article In today's Times about teaching resources for RSE from the proud trust.

www.thetimes.co.uk/article/government-gives-pupils-sex-advice-on-the-roll-of-a-dice-80hmsplws

In summary "The government has funded a tool kit written by the Proud Trust, an LGBT charity, which includes dice featuring words such as “anus”, “vulva”, “penis” and “hands and fingers”. Children are encouraged to throw the dice twice and talk about the sexual acts that can happen using the two body parts".

AIBU to think this is deeply inappropriate and any school using Proud Trust resources needs investigating? WTF is the government doing funding pornographic material for children?

This is all about money isn't it?

With gay marriage in law and equalities act etc etc most of the stuff they were agitating for have been done. Of course discrimination still exists and stuff like making refugees prove they are gay but the big legal stuff is done.

Where will they get money from? Stonewall went down the T route and is making a fortune training companies etc. The income from schools in training around T is also useful. This sex education piece seems to be another avenue of income.

Thing is it's not a specialist area for them. And their experience is in supporting LGB people (but in practice these groups mainly supported men).

That shows up in the materials which show a bias towards dick, a woeful lack of knowledge about female sexuality and bodies, and overlooks both the power dynamics and societal context of het sex for women and girls, and the dangers.

Would any of the people defending this actually want to have done it as a 13 year old? Do you think it would have helped you AT ALL?

I think upthread it mentions £100k to produce this. From the tampon tax. Which is insult to injury, quite frankly.

This pack might be ok with young adults in a small regular group about sexuality or something, for gay young men. They only need to swap out vulva for something else.

I wonder if that's where it came from.

It’s the same with the poor kids on the receiving end, a girl scared of saying the didn’t like anal sex just in case she wasn’t cool enough, woke enough or criticised for being homophobic.

Anything that gets thrown at posters here for ‘not being relaxed enough’ or ‘homophobic’ if they criticise the dice game, will get thrown at kids doing it, either by implication or afterwards by other kids.

@NiceGerbil I think that even young adults can be incredibly vulnerable. I worked with very vulnerable young adults, some from mental illness, others because of disability. They were particularly suggestible and some were targeted by abusive men. Some were young gay men. We had to work hard to encourage them to have boundaries, and to be able to say No to certain sexual acts, that they felt they should do to gain friends, or love.

This dice game is not appropriate for anyone.

Boundaries comes before anything.

@NiceGerbil

This is all about money isn't it?

With gay marriage in law and equalities act etc etc most of the stuff they were agitating for have been done. Of course discrimination still exists and stuff like making refugees prove they are gay but the big legal stuff is done.

Where will they get money from? Stonewall went down the T route and is making a fortune training companies etc. The income from schools in training around T is also useful. This sex education piece seems to be another avenue of income.

Thing is it's not a specialist area for them. And their experience is in supporting LGB people (but in practice these groups mainly supported men).

That shows up in the materials which show a bias towards dick, a woeful lack of knowledge about female sexuality and bodies, and overlooks both the power dynamics and societal context of het sex for women and girls, and the dangers.

Bingo.

@TwelvetyOClock

Would any of the people defending this actually want to have done it as a 13 year old? Do you think it would have helped you AT ALL?

I wonder that too. As many PP have said, if I had been forced into this situation at 13, I would have found it very distressing. There is a total disregard for children's sensitivities and possible experiences of abuse. This material has not been designed to help children gain knowledge or confidence at all. It is a frickin outrage that anyone is promoting this anywhere near children.

It is a great shame really, that much of the diversity agenda does seem to be bull dozing into children’s lives in a way that is dangerous. As greater acceptance of diversity is a goal most of us would support wholeheartedly. However I do hear more and more of children being forced to take on adult preferences and opinions about sexuality and gender choices. These are adult discussions, these should be no part of sex education at all.

It is not the same as awareness of diversity, which is a completely different thing.

And even in awareness of diversity, this has to be delivered to children expertly by professionals who are not pushing their agenda, or seeing a way to make money for their charity. Diversity charities should be seen as consultants for schools in any manner. They are not qualified to be in that position.

That has borne out even with the ‘diversity’ education parts of materials that I noted before said ‘Love has no age limit’ and referenced a very worrying book with a child. That this charity could even think of letting something out with Love has no age limit - to promote diversity - shows how utterly frightening it is to have ill equipped charities anywhere near kids.

The increase in our awareness of child safety, safeguarding and knowledge that they are particularly suggestible and vulnerable, is hard won. We must ensure that schools and our children get the very best for them. We must protect their right to grow and make decisions for themselves.

Nice

Douglas Murray calls this 'St.George in retirement syndrome.' Stonewall is a brand worn by agents of the state like the police. They are the establishment. As others have said, this attempt to conflate teaching about diversity with forcing children to discuss niche, violent sexual activities does nothing at all to help girls or boys, irrespective of their sexual orientation.

What Icecream just said. Absolutely agree.

I don’t think this will encourage acceptance of gay men, because it will give the bullies more verbal weapons to use against any young lads that are still coming to terms with their sexuality. I can just picture them taunting their gay classmates with, “do you stick your dick in XYZ, etc”. Not to mention the increased sexual harassment of female students, whose pleasure and rights are completely ignored throughout this horrible teaching material. I’ve not mentioned lesbians, because the men who created this material haven’t given even one mention of female pleasure.

How is getting children to describe sexual positions, some of which are perverse, not to mention dangerous, going to help the thousands of young girls that are sexually harassed, assaulted and even raped, every single week of school, throughout the UK and NI?

gay boys, not men

I don’t think this will encourage acceptance of gay men, because it will give the bullies more verbal weapons to use against any young lads that are still coming to terms with their sexuality. I can just picture them taunting their gay classmates with, “do you stick your dick in XYZ, etc”. Not to mention the increased sexual harassment of female students, whose pleasure and rights are completely ignored throughout this horrible teaching material. I’ve not mentioned lesbians, because the men who created this material haven’t given even one mention of female pleasure

I agree with you. Not only is this material totally inappropriate because of safeguarding, boundary and privacy issues, but as you highlight, it exposes students who are navigating their sexuality to bullying. Why didn't its author consider any of these issues? Who is the author? Why is that information missing?

@BovaryX

Nice

Douglas Murray calls this 'St.George in retirement syndrome.' Stonewall is a brand worn by agents of the state like the police. They are the establishment. As others have said, this attempt to conflate teaching about diversity with forcing children to discuss niche, violent sexual activities does nothing at all to help girls or boys, irrespective of their sexual orientation.

Absolutely.

Why didn't its author consider any of these issues? Who is the author? Why is that information missing?

If that person has been signposted to this thread, all I would say is we see you mate, stay the hell away from kids.

And until a single person’s name is attributed to it, the Proud Trust one it, they commissioned it, they assessed it as suitable and they released it. So they can stay the hell away too.

*own it

IceCream yes fair enough. You're right.

I was wracking my brain as to where it may have come from.

I wonder that too. As many PP have said, if I had been forced into this situation at 13, I would have found it very distressing. There is a total disregard for children's sensitivities and possible experiences of abuse. This material has not been designed to help children gain knowledge or confidence at all. It is a frickin outrage that anyone is promoting this anywhere near children.

Completely agree.

All that 'prude' stuff is used to pressure people, mainly women, into doing stuff they don't want to do.

This. It's a form of social coercion.

I think the lesson from this horror show of sex “education” is that parents, guardians, and school governors need to keep a really close eye on material that is used to resource and support teaching in sensitive areas such as relationships and sex education.

I’m not suggest the absolute blanket protests made by parents in Birmingham last year, but reasoned and respectful discussion.

Yes, teenagers need good education around relationships - which will include some sex education

But it needs to be knowledgeable about both sexes, and respectful of the wide range of maturity experience and belief in any school class room.

And it needs to focus on self-confidence, self-knowledge, respect for others, and boundaries.

I shudder to think about playing this game when I was 13 or 14. Just awful.

YANBU.