AIBU to think teachers should not be teaching sex games to children?

[2fallsagain]

Article In today's Times about teaching resources for RSE from the proud trust.

www.thetimes.co.uk/article/government-gives-pupils-sex-advice-on-the-roll-of-a-dice-80hmsplws

In summary "The government has funded a tool kit written by the Proud Trust, an LGBT charity, which includes dice featuring words such as “anus”, “vulva”, “penis” and “hands and fingers”. Children are encouraged to throw the dice twice and talk about the sexual acts that can happen using the two body parts".

AIBU to think this is deeply inappropriate and any school using Proud Trust resources needs investigating? WTF is the government doing funding pornographic material for children?

I am all for sex ed but dear G-d if I'd had to play this at school, I would have wanted to curl up and die.

@twoHopes

Some adult probably thought they were being down with the kids by using urban dictionary, not understanding that it is mostly jokes and trolling.

Haha I totally agree. This dice game feels like it was created by the "cool mum" in Mean Girls. "Hey girls, if you want to sunflower then that's totally cool, I'd just rather you do it in the house".

The 'sunflowering' description was on the Warwickshire Council sex ed site, not part of the dice game, I don't think.

And if it was made up and they didn't bother to check if it was a joke, then it's even more alarming. They're detailing an act that looks like it has the potential to cause a lot of pain, if not damage. To children.

That would just prove why they should step the hell away from 'educating' children on such things, if they're not capable of doing some basic research.

YABU. Kids as young as 13 will start having sex. Not all parents are comfortable talking about sex. I trust the teachers know what they are doing.

Kids as young as 11 are having sex because A) they want to and B) parents and schools haven't been teaching Sex Ed in a way kids can relate to EVER

Well tbh it a child was having sex at 11 I’d be phoning SS as clearly something terrible has happened

@Iamhappyasiam

YABU. Kids as young as 13 will start having sex. Not all parents are comfortable talking about sex. I trust the teachers know what they are doing.

I’m not sure if posters are utterly ignorant and dangerously unaware of what actually else comes with this game OR they are utter weirdos.

No one one should be talking to 13 year olds about group sex. If you think that’s ok - you need help

@Iamhappyasiam

YABU. Kids as young as 13 will start having sex. Not all parents are comfortable talking about sex. I trust the teachers know what they are doing.

I’d have known what I was doing, which would be binning this pernicious vileness. But not all teachers are in a position to do so. They may be told they have to use said resource. It’s really not something anyone - particularly parents - should feel complacent about.

@Iamhappyasiam

YABU. Kids as young as 13 will start having sex. Not all parents are comfortable talking about sex. I trust the teachers know what they are doing.

If teachers know that children are having sex, but quite happy with that, then they’re exactly the kind of teachers that shouldn’t be teaching this crap. Many of those children will not be having sex through choice, but will be manipulated and abused by older children, mostly males. That doesn’t make it right.

@NiceGerbil fantastic post summing up the issues nicely.

@borntobequiet the fact that there are teachers put there who teach this abomination despite their better instincts is precisely why the public by and large has little respect for the profession and why it deserves to have lost respect. Doing what is not underpinned by proper underpinning knowledge does not fall within the definition of being a professional.

kids will grasp the fundamentals of same sex relationships, which is LONG overdue in this country

Any girl wanting to find out about the sexual pleasures of lesbianism will be sorely disappointed by this game. No clitoris, no nipples, no breasts, no inner thighs, no vagina.

[quote OhTheRoses]@borntobequiet the fact that there are teachers put there who teach this abomination despite their better instincts is precisely why the public by and large has little respect for the profession and why it deserves to have lost respect. Doing what is not underpinned by proper underpinning knowledge does not fall within the definition of being a professional.[/quote]
Well thanks for that. That’s me told.

Iamhappyasiam
YABU. Kids as young as 13 will start having sex. Not all parents are comfortable talking about sex. I trust the teachers know what they are doing.

This comment is seriously disturbing. 13. Is. Not. Legal.

YANBU It is the liberal/left/MSM woke bs push... Teaching in state schools is becoming even more liberal & political than it ever was, then go onto uni etc and you understand the mindset of the youth! Once one matures in age you begin to understand the BS that you've been brainwashed with and adjust accordingly. Thankfully the country has resisted this in the elections so far but look at inner-city primary schools and it won't be long before we are back in the dark ages and a scary Socialist free for all, without hard work but just pure envy/evil and chaos on the streets! 10 x what the things are doing today!

Kids as young as 11 are having sex because A) they want to and B) parents and schools haven't been teaching Sex Ed in a way kids can relate to EVER

Surely you mean Kids as young as 11 are being raped because a) they are being or have been abused and/or b) they have been groomed

It’s not a left wing thing. This isn’t the old politics. Characterising it like this stops people thinking about it properly. If anything, it’s libertarian.
Identity politics is a new phenomenon, and this is one aspect of it.
Old style socialists - and old style conservatives - are equally appalled by this dereliction of decent behaviour.

What it is, is extraordinarily aggressive. So is the attitude pushing every detail of male fetishes onto any and every trapped female.

I teach a course at schools called ‘Speakeasy’ which is aimed at parents enable them to feel comfortable talking to their children about sex and relationships. One of the activities is a timeline aged 0 - 16+ the parents turn over a card with a word on it ‘kissing’ ‘hugging’ ‘penis’ ‘vagina’ ‘oral sex’ a whole plethora of words covering the mild to the explicit. As a group the parents place the word on the timeline at the age they would be happy talking to their children about that word. They start of putting all the explicit words at the 16+ end but as they put more mild words further down they realise that if they start talking about a mild word it could with children’s questions lead them down a more detailed path, they the start moving things down from 16+. Parents and teachers are a trusted source of this information once children are at secondary school their friends will be talking to them about this stuff ( but a lot of it will be misleading or out of context ) if you want your children to be equipped with the power of correct information you have to take responsibility for it. It is far from pornography ( that will come from your child’s friends and their phones) it is vital information your child needs to make informed decisions and value their own body and future.

This is a great idea, managed well as it will stop all the crappy speculative conversations that some in the “know” might share.
Also removing the taboo is essential and is proven to reduce STI rates, underage sex and unwanted pregnancy.
It will also empower young people to use correct language and encourage consent.

Brilliant. Yesss, let’s remove the taboo and empower our young people.

DaveProdrick Your comment doesn’t address any of the concerns on this thread about this game. It’s almost like you haven’t read the thread.

This is a perfect response, thank you for being so articulate

That is you told actually @borntobequiet. I have been politically active for all of my adult life, and there has been quite a lot of it as I am 60. Never, ever have I taken my politics to work because they have no place there. But golly I've challenged some leftie school teachers spouting gobshite that has nothing to do with teaching. Tends not to happen in the independent sector where one pays for the skills. The tendency of a vocation to feed personal opinion into developing minds is truly reprehensible. remembers the head teacher who got the girls to write in support of the teachers strike circa 2011/12 but who refused to publish a price setting out a different view. Despicable and not very intellectual imo. Fortunately we had enough money to remove dd from the ghastly and dictatorial environment that discouraged freedom of thought.

@ToftyAC

Most 13 year olds know about this anyway. I find this a very European approach to sex Ed, which is a much better idea. They know how not to be prudes and open and honest.

What is "the European" approach? All European countries have the same approach to sex education?

Anyway, the UK is actually in Europe.

13 is very young to have sex.

It will mainly be girls who are having 'consensual' sex at this age with older boys or men. That is not an equal power dynamic and one as old as the hills. A large minority of men fancy girls this age and a large part of that is that they are much easier to manipulate than older girls and women.

This will also apply to boys who are interested in experimenting with boys or men.

Also of course there will be out and out non consensual things going on which does not seem to be on the radar of this game.

I just realised as well. I thought putting this from age 13 was an odd choice. Secondary starts from a bit younger. Why not have packs that do eg year 7-9 and then year 10 up it something? I just realised that if you have sex with an under 13 child, in law it is supposed to be no defence, it's always a crime. While for 13 to 16 there is more leeway in terms of defence in court etc. Coincidence? School packs normally relate to year not age, surely?

The other issue is the way society sees esp girls who are sexually active young is really dodgy. They are often seen as sexually knowing. Leading poor adult men astray etc. This is the reason that Rotherham etc were ignored for so long- the girls were seen as active participants in relationships, or 'child prostitutes' again as if it was what they wanted and what can you do?

This pack seems to take the same approach.

Kids WILL have seen all sorts in porn, they WILL be sexually active young.... It's putting adult feelings and understanding onto what are young kids. 13 and up.

What they should be taught is surely.
These are the bits on boys and girls that many enjoy having touched, but not universal. When you are ready find out what you like.
Porn is a fantasy and often from a certain perspective. Lots of things shown skip any preparation -foreplay etc and are not reflective of real life sex. The acts nor the bodies.
Clitoris must be included and must show internal structure.
Coercion, saying no, manipulation/grooming.
Dangers of sharing pics.
Respect/ experiment/ no need to rush (although i doubt teens have changed on the last one!).
And that sort of thing.
No need to go from 0-100, years of being sexually active to find what you like.
STD, condoms, pregnancy etc.

I mean I'm sure there's more.

The women who say yikes on this thread, are many. Calling them all 'prudes' is a bit pathetic tbh. As a PP said, similar to boys calling girls frigid to provoke them into discarding boundaries. But we're not girls we're women and immune to that sort of behaviour.

I have no idea why so many women on the thread are cheerleading this.

Even the simple fact that most children would be mortified to think of and suggest ways to put the things on the dice together in front of their class is enough, surely?

I mean I wouldn't fancy doing this at work and we're all grown ups!

Also removing the taboo is essential and is proven to reduce STI rates, underage sex and unwanted pregnancy.

This is normally evidenced by looking at countries such as the Netherlands. However, what is rarely mentioned is the culture; it is not speaking about it that means these countries have lower rates of underage sex and unwanted pregnancies, it is cultural attitudes to sex which are actually fairly conservative.

@OhTheRoses

That is you told actually *@borntobequiet*. I have been politically active for all of my adult life, and there has been quite a lot of it as I am 60. Never, ever have I taken my politics to work because they have no place there. But golly I've challenged some leftie school teachers spouting gobshite that has nothing to do with teaching. Tends not to happen in the independent sector where one pays for the skills. The tendency of a vocation to feed personal opinion into developing minds is truly reprehensible. remembers the head teacher who got the girls to write in support of the teachers strike circa 2011/12 but who refused to publish a price setting out a different view. Despicable and not very intellectual imo. Fortunately we had enough money to remove dd from the ghastly and dictatorial environment that discouraged freedom of thought.

Gosh.