How many 'great' child free years did you get before becoming a parent?

[CheesyGhost]

I mean the years where you were thoroughly enjoying adult life, doing whatever you wanted (obviously within reason) with very few responsibilities. Be that travelling, having a great social life, being a cosy hermit with Netflix, focusing 100% on your career; whatever total freedom meant for you; how many years did you have before becoming parent. And what made you feel you were ready to give up those freedoms to have children?
I didn't like my university experience sadly and saw it as an extension of something to endure like school to reach a better side and it did work, but it means I count these 'great' years from after finishing university.

DH and I do want children but are enjoying life right now and want to feel we've made the most of it before we start our family. I'm not saying that having a family is not wonderful in itself; clearly it is and we do want that, I'm just very aware that it's a very different kind of wonderful and we need to be prepared to say goodbye to this part of our lives for now at least when we decide to start trying.

None - I got preg with my first at 21 and had him at 22. With hindsight I can’t believe how young I was! I hadn’t even really started to be an adult lol.

14, I was ready for children around 4 years before I had them but hadn't met my husband.

I had some great times pre children but ultimately always wanted them and so it wasn't a hard decision at all to give up some of those freedoms (and disposable income!).

Until I had my first DC at 32. Thing is, I didn’t know what I had until it was gone. Made the adjustment quite hard!

About 10 years. I had my first at 34 and had a lot of fun in my 20s and early 30s.

I had my first child at 30. I spent most of my 20s wanting children but circumstances didn't allow.

My husband and I graduated and started working in 2007 and had our son in 2018. The first couple of years were pretty lean but we started being able to afford nice holidays from 2010 when we got married. I'm going to say 8.

18. It was great but I was ready to move on

Zero.

Pregnant at 20 & 22.

12 years of free "adulting".
3 years of that with my husband.

Happy with it overall, but would have liked more time just the two of us. We thought it might take a while to conceive, but then got pregnant the first contraceptive-free month 🤦🏼‍♀️

I loved university and had a good job throughout. Did holidays, bought a flat, did pubs, marathons, weekend walks in the wilderness, got drunk, extra work courses etc, for around 7 years. I loved it. It was exhausting too and it’s nice now to have a slower pace. I could not have maintained it longer because I wanted a family life and got less and less from these things as time progressed. Most other people I know carried on child free life longer.

Loads as I had the first of my three children a month after I turned 39

Cuts both ways ime
I don’t feel I’m missing out on social activities, travel, spontaneous things as I had a fantastic exciting life full of fun, adventure and good times for almost twenty years after first graduating . I miss sleep though.

Also when they are bring naughty and I’m fed up with them I do sometimes wistfully look back on my life before.

Not that I would change them though. Bring a parent is the most exciting and fulfilling thing I will ever do.

Depends how old you are already????

Probably between the ages of 21-30 for me then encountered fertility problems by the age of 32 and completely infertile by 36.......

It's great you want to "enjoy life" but don't be one of "those" couples that prioritises that over having a family and then find in your late 30s early 40s that having kids isn't as easy as you thought it would be. IVF isn't guaranteed to give you children

I didn't enjoy uni either. I met DH three months after graduation and were together 9 years before DC, DS arrived just shy of our 4th wedding anniversary. I was 31 when he was born.

I had a great time in my 20s pursuing hobbies, travelling a lot and being a bit selfish. I do miss the time I had for myself but love being a Mum. I wouldn't have been ready earlier.

I went to uni at 18, had first baby at 31 so about 13. Bloody loved my carefree 20s.

• being not bring

Sorry, as for why we wanted to give up that type of freedom - we changed our minds on having children at Christmas 2016 when I was 32. I didn't want to wait until I was past 35 in case it took a few years, because our parents were all in their 60s and we didn't want them to miss their only grandchild.

Honestly we had been to most places on our travel list, had a big enough house, and had both achieved the careers we wanted. It was going to be a long 40 years to retirement.

Had my dd at 30 so about 12 years. It was the right age for me. I had enjoyed my 20s and achieved some personal goals, and felt very broody!

Probably about 5 years? Age 18-27 was mostly OK, I had some good times in life. But everything came together in my late twenties and my career choices started to (literally) pay off, and I went on some excellent holidays, found a nice house and really got my life in order and was loving everything. I didn’t see how children could fit into it and had no plans to have any, until I missed a period and found myself staring at a BFP one day

DS arrived earlier this year and life is still good, slightly different, but it doesn’t feel like I’ll never get to do any of the things I enjoyed in the past. Holidays seem a bit difficult in theory, but we had no plans to go away this year anyway so I’m happy to wait until travel issues settle down a bit before attempting that.

I met my DH when I was 18, we had our first child when I was 29, he was 31. We definitely had 11 good years before having our DD.
We partied, traveled, made careers, bought a house and although becoming parents at that moment in time wasn’t our plan we had planned on waiting a other couple of years it’s been the best thing to ever happen to us.
We have a home, stable careers, and we still travel we just take DD along with us now.
We took her to California on a 10 hour flight when she was 9 months old. She’s changed our lives in many ways but we’ve also tried to fit her into our existing life best we could

5 years. Married at 23 and first DC and 28. I guess we had done some travelling and got that out of our system, had secure jobs, bought a house and felt ready for them. Now DH and I are mid 40's, DC are late teens and I'm looking forward to some more child free years again!

I had my only child by choice a couple of months before turning 40. Was happier to risk not being able to have one than curtailing my life before that.

Hardly any which I sometimes regret! Saying that, I do wonder if we would have reached the stage where we were ready to give that freedom up. We weren’t desperate to have kids, we just had no imagination and assumed it was what had to happen once you got married 🙄

There are advantages to having them young though. It’s nice now the dc are grown up and we don’t have a massive generation gap, we travel together, go out to the pub, I go and see bands with my ds.

Swings and roundabouts!

About 11 - from 18 (loved university) to 29. I didn't have DS until 31 but the period trying to have him while having multiple miscarriages and then having a very anxious pregnancy really were not top fun times. Though by that logic I should also knock out a year or so for the worst of the depression I had in my mid-20s...

Having DC was definitely a decision made with the heart not the head but I have never regretted it - I know a lot of women do look back very wistfully on the time before their DC but I never wish I was still child-free. I had some really fun times in my 20s - had a blast living with friends, drinking too much, the odd unsuitable man, lots of spontaneity - but I really wouldn't want to still be living like that now.

15 years. First became a parent at 35. We travelled, developed our careers, made ourselves financially stable. Worked out perfectly for us. Mumsnet didn't like older parents but honestly, being financially stable before having children makes things a lot easier. And having life experience is really valuable too.

By the time I had mine at 34 I definitely felt ready to move on to the next stage of my life.