How many 'great' child free years did you get before becoming a parent?

[CheesyGhost]

I mean the years where you were thoroughly enjoying adult life, doing whatever you wanted (obviously within reason) with very few responsibilities. Be that travelling, having a great social life, being a cosy hermit with Netflix, focusing 100% on your career; whatever total freedom meant for you; how many years did you have before becoming parent. And what made you feel you were ready to give up those freedoms to have children?
I didn't like my university experience sadly and saw it as an extension of something to endure like school to reach a better side and it did work, but it means I count these 'great' years from after finishing university.

DH and I do want children but are enjoying life right now and want to feel we've made the most of it before we start our family. I'm not saying that having a family is not wonderful in itself; clearly it is and we do want that, I'm just very aware that it's a very different kind of wonderful and we need to be prepared to say goodbye to this part of our lives for now at least when we decide to start trying.

I am 50 this year amd have had no child free years as an adult. I had my 1st at 19 and my last at 40.
I have to say dh and I are kind of looking forward to it at some point if we're not too decrepit to enjoy it.

Met DH at 19. Married at 24. Babies at 25&26.
Now planning semi retirement and care free life for our mid-late 40s. So we didn't get it while young, but will hopefully get it later.

We got together when we were 18 and 19, rented houses, bought a house, loads of holidays, out most weekends and we had our first baby when i was 30 and partner was 31.

I'm pleased we did everything we did first, had a lot of fun but we were young enough to do it.

4.5 years. Graduated 2011 (had a miserable time at university so not counting that time), married 2013 and had DS 2016.

I am a massive homebody and an introvert so was never into travelling (beyond short city breaks) or clubbing etc. Love my life as a parent so much more although the first months were a shock and very hard.

My freedom years will be my 40s onwards and for me I much prefer that as as I get older I grow in confidence and am more sure of what I enjoy. I know that by the time I get there I will focus on the things that truly matter to me. Barring anything awful happening I will still be fit and active in my 40s and 50s and if I do get the urge to travel widely I will still be able to do so.

However I expect my time will be filled with long countryside walks, gardening, reading and short holidays in the UK and Europe. I have found my social life has improved since having DS and I hope that continues in the future. I also massively look forward to quality couple time with DH too but I'm happy with our family life for now.

Probably about 17! Went to uni at 18, met dh at 21, had first baby at 35.
We had an amazing child free time. Travelled a lot and enjoyed our careers. Now we have 3 kids and that’s amazing too.

We were on the fence about having kids, but at 34 decided we’d try because we didn’t want to regret not having them. Turns out that was the best decision we’ve ever made.

I’d say about 6! I was still desperate for a baby throughout though! 😊 We’ve done lots of holidays in the time we’ve been together and now look forward to taking baby with us on holiday!

None - I had my eldest children when i was 18 and 22. I’ve never once thought to myself that I did the wrong thing or had any regrets.

None really but my forties have been amazing so far - no more school or young kids to worry about, love spending time with adult children.

None. I met my DH at 17, fell pregnant at 20 and had my first DS just after I turned 21 then went on to have two more DS by the time i was 28.

At the time I thought I was ready and in hindsight I seemed in a hurry to 'grow up' but looking back I was a baby and as much as I love my kids I regret having them so young. I missed out on so much and have never been alone since 17 or know what life would be like as an adult without children.

I was with my partner 8 years before we got pregnant and 9 when our son came. I would say I had a lot of fun from being about 16.

We were very poor for first couple years then out careers took off and we went for fancy dinners, nice holidays and hotels etc.

I don't have any regrets and I'm happy the age im at.

Had first DC at 32 and had a lot of child free fun from 18 until then. I loved my uni years though the best child free years were when me & (now) DH got together which was when I was 26 so we had a fab 6 years of travelling, going out (meals, clubbing, gigs etc), seeing friends...
Our years since having DC have trumped all that though, it's very different but amazing!

21. I left home for uni at 17, met DH at 20, got married at 24 and had DD at 38. I've taken a long time to adjust.

None, really. Spent my twenties broke, stressed and lonely. Early thirties DH and I had a long distance relationship while we saved up for wedding and house deposit (so still broke). Then got pregnant soon after the wedding. You're only living the dream years that you describe if you have enough money as well as the freedom.

I was 27 with my first so not very young but way younger than my circle who are only starting now at 35+. We completed degrees and a post grad each and travelled around Europe a few summers and went to Central and south America and some parts of Asia pre kids.
It’s often assumed on here that people who have kids in their 20’s never did anything before and haven’t “lived”... We also got married pre kids. Then again we were late 20’s not early.
We’ve travelled a lot with kids too but obviously very different to before but also great (although not remotely relaxing) experiences!
I’m glad we are now 36 and have our baby-making days begin us, our youngest is three.
Also I’m really glad that we just went for it as it looks really hard for my friends who are trying to make that decision. One of my friends say they go back and forth all the time, they love their lives and don’t want it to change but want a family and they are both 36 so not that young to be still in the thinking part.
We never went through that, we wanted a family and wanted to have them before 33 and we got lucky which obviously plays a huge part too.
We are working on our house now so I guess a lot of people would want to renovate before kids but we hadn’t bought it as we were living abroad but I do see how a lot of people want to be settled and home owners before kids.
Each to their own but I’m glad we aren’t starting out late 30’s and my dh swap over a lot and are now back running and socializing a bit more and most importantly back sleeping again after years and years of sleep deprivation!!
Good luck op on whatever you decide

Loads. Had my first at 35 so plenty of time for partying, travelling, career building etc. I would have liked more carefree/child free time w DH - we married after

Had my first child at 32. I’m a teacher, qualified when I was 21 so that decade of child free holidays was fantastic. DH and I would travel at every opportunity. Also having children ‘later’ meant we could buy a house in a good schooling area and we plan to be here until our children leave home.

1. Age 21-22. I travelled and worked around asia. It was bliss. After that I was studying for my masters, I was broke, I was working two jobs and managing a long distance relationship. Once I was done with that I had heaps of debt to pay off (my country has no student loans) so me and my now DH just lived in a cheap and very cold flat paying off the debt, and then we got engaged so once the debt was gone we saved for a wedding which we paid 100% ourselves. I was 26 getting married and buying a house and 27 when I had my first kid. I am now 29 and due my second in november

Dont get me wrong, I chose to do all of this. I wasnt miserable. We still had dinners out and the odd weekend away. But it was hard at times. But now I have my kids and I do love being a mom, and I am a teacher so I have a good career. I guess I will 'enjoy' life again when they are in their 20s and I am in my 50s

About 12. I was very lucky to have loved my university experience, it was an incredible time for me. I then had a very bleak period of 2-3 years - terrible money worries, depression, poor job prospects, aimlessness. Then I went back to uni for a professional qualification, loved the experience, got a job I adore, and have been happy since working, travelling, etc etc.

I’m now pregnant with my first and it feels like the right time. I’m ready for this new chapter, and it feels like a fun new adventure rather than an end to old ones.

About 8 years.

I never really wanted children. Didn’t intend to get pregnant but by then it was the next thing that a lot of people our age were doing so we went along with it.

I love my children but actually I think I would have been happier in adult life without them. Having children has constrained so much of what I want to do and how I want to do it. I feel quite stuck in a ‘conventional’ life with a husband, a mortgage and children.

If there’s any chance that’s you too, don’t have them. If not, crack on.

Had my first at 34 and second at 36. DH and I had been together for a decade by then. Great times 😂
These are good times too, of course, just with much less sleep and fewer spontaneous social events!

Probably enjoyed a few bits of 21-26, then met dh and did lots of trips/travel/outdoors stuff/a few festivals 26-30 then got married and had dc all within three years.

Met DH at 20, married at 29 and pregnant at 30, so about ten years. Absolutely perfect. Had some amazing hols and when the DC are grown up in three or four years we'll be off again.

My husband and I were married for 5 years before deciding to have a baby. I'm expecting my first in a few weeks, aged 28. It was important to me to enjoy married life together before introducing a baby, and we've enjoying a lot of travelling, nights out, and general baby-free living. I wouldn't change it for anything. Also means we're comfortable - we own our house and cars and know exactly how the other works mentally, emotionally, financially... Can't wait for this next chapter!

It's not wonderful if you are just waiting for the next stage though, just really think about what you want to do, make some goals and plans and start to visualise life. But don't leave ttc too late.

Dh and I had been married 7 years when ds came along. But we were trying to conceive for 5 of those, IVF etc. Although they were difficult years emotionally, we did manage lots of free time, great holidays, disposable income.