@Beckixox hey Op, firstly sending you a huge hug.
I was married to a man like this.
Secret debts appeared all the time, I stuck it out for 6 years after I found out. The scale of debt was enormous. He had no remorse or intentions of fixing it. He had every kind of CCJ/credit mark/he was blacklisted from lenders and I knew nothing. I was stupid and naive and too young to know better than to have these type of discussions before marriage. Once I knew about his problem; our problem (as we were married) he turned into a monster.
His addiction turned out to be second hand cars, he had nice car taste but old banger money. Riddled with debts and kept it all hidden. He would just arrive home from a "weekend at a squash tournament" with a different car. In my case at least I could see the (albeit stupid and idiotic) source of his debt, I can't imagine how worried you must be not knowing the source or reason why.
Each car would turn out to be a mess and need to be sold or written off as he couldn't repair. He once turned up with a very old and tired Range Rover - that had a crack in the engine block and repairs would cost more than the car. I drove a 1ltr corsa for our entire relationship.
I tried everything, suggested counselling and debt charity, he refused to talk about it and I only knew how bad the deceit was when we came into some inheritance (finally a chance to fix it and start fresh) and an ex girlfriend of his from before me, placed a deed of Interest (long time ago and I may not have the correct term here) on the property, via a solicitor. She filed evidence that he owed her £12k and that he had been promising to pay her for years (during our marriage)
Anyway, the house sale was about to go through so he had no choice but to pay her to make it go away.
I knew then that I could never trust him. The web of lies went deeper and further than he could admit himself- let alone to me.
He then decided he wanted a baby, so I suggested we look through his money and establish what of £30k at the time salary was actually available for us to afford to live and childcare etc after paying rent and his creditors.
There was next to nothing left, at the time we lived off around £15 a week for food shop (no joke, I even supported his 3yo step son). I had a good job and benefits but I knew I couldn't support me, DDss, him, our animals and pay his spiralling repayments.
It still took me a few more years to leave him, the divorce was awful and he went after everything I had (pension basically). He was a parasite and still to this day I know he has unfathomable amounts of debt. He went on to have a second baby with a friend of mine..lord knows what kind of life they live but I wish them best and I rest at night knowing i did what was right for me. Just wish i did it sooner.
The advise you've been given is good, seek help from charities, full disclosure from him on where his money goes, do a credit check on both of you (set up monthly reports) so you know the full picture.
I admire your loyalty to him and your vows - you sound lovely - but right now he has lied to you and you need to protect yourself and your children from possible further damage and further deceit.
Try and think with your brain first and your heart second in this scenario. I know it must be heartbreaking.
Most importantly and lastly if your parents do bail you him you need to make sure a solicitor oversees this and prepares a deed of trust so that if he does do a runner they would would be able to take him to court for the money. This is what my ex did.
Sorry for the long post, i've never shared anything about this before!