Inheritance

[Familyshitshow]

Trying to keep this anonymous as possible for obvious reasons.

Darling Grandparent has left a shit show of a will and we’re not sure how to break it to the grandchildren:

Grandchild A: has got everything except some cash (the house/possessions/car/jewellery etc).
Grandchild B/C/D/E: has got the cash (not huge amounts) split between them.
Grandchild F: has been written out of the will (due to ‘personality differences’).
Grandchild G: nothing (but shouldn’t be too surprised due to behaviour somewhat recently but never that close).

Grandchild A knows they’ve inherited all and knew for a while but was a shock once the Will was written. Most of B/C/E knew it was coming that grandchild A would get all as they were the favoured.

Grandchild F has no idea that not only weren’t they particularly liked by their grandparent (silly life choices that the grand scheme of things aren’t a huge deal), that they need the funds more than all. Grandchild G will be very bitter but don’t really have a leg to stand on.

How on earth should the will be ‘read’ and should grandchild A split between all?

It should be read as it is and the wishes of the grandparent respected.

Will readings don't happen anymore in England, not sure about anywhere else. I'd write to the beneficiary grandchildren to state what they get and not mention what they don't or what anyone else inherits. The two who get nothing, you could write to so they know they won't inherit - I assume you're the executor? But ultimately if they are not named in the Will they aren't entitled to know anything anyway. It's their choice if they want to lodge a caveat at the District Probate Registry to stop Probate being granted if they feel they have a claim to the estate as dependants. Just as it is A's choice if they wish to do a Deed of Variation within two years of death to equal things up. But again, up to them.

(Sorry if things have changed if not looked at probate law in a few years).

It should be diced out exactly how the grandparent wished it to be.

What's the point in making a will if the beneficiaries are just going to divvy it up between them as THEY see fit rather than the deceased get to actually choose where THEIR money goes??

Dished not diced 🤦‍♀️

The wishes of the grandparents should be carried out as stipulated in the will.

Whether or not you agree with then is irrelevant.

What grandchild A decides to do with their inheritance is up to them and them alone. No pressure should be applied.

I'd find it an awkward sort of will, but there must have been family circumstances which have led up to it.

Are you an executor of the will? It is up to the executors to see that the wishes expressed in the will are carried out.

Whether you think F deserves it (or are F) is inconsequential- you/ they fell out with grandparent and grandparent had enough time to change will- so shouldn't be a surprise. Ultimately they have divided their possessions and they saw fit. If there is anything hugely sentimental in the house to a specific family member I'd hope A would allow them to have it if it wasn't juts a money grab, but it is what it is, and the choice of the deceased.

Uneven inheritances when there isn’t a hugely good reason (like a recipient giving up years of their life as a carer for example) are a pain. But you can’t do anything about it. Unless there are dependents who may have a claim, split it up as it is stated and point out to all grandchildren that it was their grand parents choice to do it that way and other people can’t be blamed. If grandchild A wants to make it an even split then they can chose to do so, but it isn’t up to other people to tell them they have to.

Poor F if their differences were over very minor things.

What does A think? If they’ve known for a while do they want to share their bequest?

Ultimately you (assuming you are the executor if telling the news is your job) just have to tell them what they’ve been left and dish it out accordingly. Legally Grandparent was fully entitled to leave their will split however they wanted, regardless of how hard it was.

I’ve seen this a couple of times (I got pretty much everything in my Nana’s will, but only because the others got theirs in cash some years before) - once the family dished it out and everyone just took their allocated share as that’s what granny wanted. On another they did a deed of variation and split equally as their Gran changed her will at the drop of a hat and the last one was very unfair.

I’d speak to A First and tell them the will.

Call the ones who've been left out and tell them personally. Don't have a reading!

Just tell them all so they can see what a shit person grandparent was.

The Will should be respected and it isn't up to you what grandchild A does with their inheritance. Leave that completely up to them.

The will stands as it was written. Whether A feels any obligation to help siblings/cousins is a completely different issue and comes down to A's own circumstances and views. It sucks to be F in particular, especially if they didn't know they weren't liked - unlike the implication G knew. If nothing else, hopefully this demonstrations to A thru G that in their own wills they should be more equal or at least honest up front.

You respect the will. The grandparent had their reasons for making it the way they did and whether you like it or not you have to respect it. Nobody is ‘entitled’ to anything.

why is it a shit show of a will? - it sounds quite clear from your description.

The deceased didn't say "I leave it to Familyshitshow to do what the hell she wants to with my estate' - so why are you even questioning this?
there is no grand will reading, I think they only happen in films.
Whoever is administering the estate lets the beneficiaries know what they are entitled to.
It would be polite to let those who might have expected to inherit but haven't know that.

why is it a shit show of a will? - it sounds quite clear from your description.

Shitshow doesn't normally mean unclear, more that it is going to be awkward for others. Here it seems to mean unkind, difficult for those left behind and bound to cause hurt feelings. Quite a legacy, really.

There is no requirement for a will to be respected - go look up cases in the chancery courts - rich people fighting over wills are a joy to behold (and much more insightful into the worst of human nature than criminal cases!).

A should do whatever they wish - including being fair (unlike the vile rather than darling grandparent!)

@rorosemary

Just tell them all so they can see what a shit person grandparent was.

What a dreadful thing to do. The grandparent, not the PP. Imagine using your will to mess with your GCs' relationships after you die and 'punish' one of them in particular. I know the MN wisdom is that the will writer can do what they want, but in RL, families ought to behave kindly, and with fairness.

This will punishes F and G but also A, because there will be resentment and ill feeling.

I'd tell them all, inform A (and B, C, D and E) about varying wills and how that works and hope the GC are better people than their GP.

It always amazes me that people do not know what the purpose of a Will is.

The person who owned property is now dead. They are physically unable to convey property as a gift to the person or persons to whom they wanted it to go. The Will is the mechanism through which they can convey that property after they have died.

It really is not rocket science.

@Manolin

It always amazes me that people do not know what the purpose of a Will is.

The person who owned property is now dead. They are physically unable to convey property as a gift to the person or persons to whom they wanted it to go. The Will is the mechanism through which they can convey that property after they have died.

It really is not rocket science.

Not a single poster has suggested they don't know what a will is, but do enjoy your pompous, and not remotely helpful to the OP's situation, attitude.

Grandparent made a decision which was expressed in a will and should be respected.Why cant they decide about how to distribute their assets?

Why on earth would grandchild A split their inheritance? Just do what the will says.

@Regretsandregrets

Grandparent made a decision which was expressed in a will and should be respected.Why cant they decide about how to distribute their assets?

They can.

And the beneficiary’s can decide how to distribute theirs.

Wills like this can create hurt for generations. So if A would prefer to prioritise their siblings/cousins, they should. They are also entitled to do what they wish with their money.

In this particular case the deceased sounds particularly spiteful and if A believes that favouritism and spitefulness have no place in a loving family, they may choose to vary the will. Or they may not.

Their grandparents have gifted them that choice, as their favourite.

They haven’t gifted that choice to the others.

That’s all a will ever really does. It gives the beneficiaries choices.

@lyralalala

Fair comment. I apologise. There is little advice to give the OP. I say this. Grandchild A should not be pressured into giving up their inheritance. Grandchild F could take solace in their difference. Sometimes its not a bad thing in the long run to be different from the crowd. There is little else I would do in the circumstances.