My one year caught a cold or something in nursery

[Alison421e]

Doing a settling in for my one year old last week and supposed to do next week too. I’m back to work very soon. Monday and Tuesday of last week were fab but on Wednesday another child came in for settling too and was visibly ill. This child was sneezing and coughing with thick green mucus coming out of nose which mum was constantly cleaning. This child took an interest in my little one and sneezed over him a couple of times, came very close to me and tried sitting on my lap which I obviously let happen as what else do you do! Mother was just sitting there not intervening. I could see snot dripping down it’s face. I asked mum if child okay and she replied “yes just teething”. This child also kept taking my little ones bottle and drank from it.

I’ve got 3 kids and it was obviously not teething it was a full blown cold! Woken up yesterday and both me and little one are ill. I’m fuming. I don’t know what if anything I should do like should I speak to nursery? Just for context I’m very quiet and reserved and not quick to anger so completely out of character for me. I’m annoyed now as I am going back to work and have no one to help settle my LO. Mil will have other 2 kids and DH working, I have no idea what to do.

LO seems a little better now. No cough just occasionally and less runny nose. What shall I do? Still take him in like this mother did as I have no option or speak to nursery but then I can’t take him in obviously as manager will say not too, but they obviously said nothing to this mother as she was in for rest of week.

Any advice? I’ve also seen no hand washing at all going on. Kids given snacks without washing hands. My eldest 2 never went nursery just straight to reception school. Any advice please?

If we stay in bed all day today I’m hoping we’ll be better. I’ve had de-humidifier running all night with vapour oil. I’m so bloody annoyed we were all so careful all these months not going anywhere. It’s a new job too so they not going to understand.

You should book yourself a Corona test. And if you're all good, send the child back to nursery.

Well yes as PP says, in the current circumstances I'd be booking a covid test to be on the safe side.

But that aside OP, I think you have to be realistic. If nurseries were in the habit of sending children home everytime they had a cold then they'd literally have no children there, ever. DS spent the first few months of his nursery life with back to back colds and whilst I did keep him home (as advised) when he was too unwell to be there, the rest of the time I sent him because otherwise I'd have lost my job I'd have been off so much. Then after a few months it all settled down and he rarely gets ill now. It's just one of those things 🤷🏼‍♀️

However, if you have genuine hygiene concerns about the nursery (like the lack of hand washing), then it's upto you to raise it, e.g. by asking them what their procedures are and even how they've strengthened them in the current circumstances. If their answer is at odds with what you observed then tell them that.

This will be the first of many many coughs and colds your child will catch at nursery. And yes, if they have a cold of course you send them in (otherwise they’d be empty most of the winter). My DS has had 3 (negative) Corona tests, he has to have one everytime he catches a cough from another child, otherwise I’d never be at work.

My DM who taught primary said she could always tell the kids who had been to nursery from those that hadn’t. Those who had been at home with mum spent most of the first year sick with various coughs and colds whilst those that had been at nursery were bullet proof.

But yes the hygiene there does sound a bit grim. At our nursery, no parents are allowed in at the moment (not sure how it’s working with settling in) but the children are taken straight to wash hands on arrival, after a walk, before and after eating etc.

Children should be washing hands before eating however they can't be not attending nursery or school because of a cold (unless said cold involves a temp/persistent cough, then obviously await negative test before attending)

I’d be angry too. In the current climate I don’t see how it’s possible for even a cold to spread if everybody’s following the correct procedures, though I guess loads of parents aren’t because they believe children don’t pass on Corona. Hmm. My son is about to start settling in too. His nursery have said they’re extremely strict about illness given the current circumstances and aren’t permitting children with colds or coughs to attend nursery. They should definitely be washing hands as well, not only before eating but at regular intervals throughout the day. I’d gently bring it up. They ought to have special Corona rules and practices in place.

Yabu. Kids are allowed in school with a cold. Some colds goes on for weeks and week.

'In the current climate I don’t see how it’s possible for even a cold to spread if everybody’s following the correct procedures'

So you're expecting nursery age children to socially distance?

Thank you. I just booked test for today. It lists symptoms as dry cough only but his is mucus type so I’m sure he doesn’t have coronavirus but should be tested.

My annoyance is that the rest of nursery kids have immunity built as they’ve been going in longer. They shouldn’t have got both of us to settle in same time - they should have staggered it especially as her kids had a cold. Shall I raise this or just leave it?

My Lo has been in a bubble for past 6 months. We’ve only seen MIL. We’ve not taken him anywhere that involved him mixing with people so his immunity I suppose is very low at moment

The settling in sounds a bit odd, with two parents in the room along with the other children. Like a PP, parents aren’t allowed over the threshold of my DCs nursery at the mo. And the other mum probably shouldn’t have brought a visibly unwell child to settle. But cold wise, it will be the first of many your DC will bring home over the winter. Babies and toddlers can’t socially distant. My youngest DC has been back at nursery about 6 weeks and is on his second cold

I think you’ve probably got grounds to sue

You don’t sound happy with the nursery setting tbh. I’d be looking about for another one. If you’re this unhappy on the settling in sessions, I doubt it would get better.

The only caveat I would have for that is if you feel that you can raise the issue/s (I would be going about the hand washing and the bottle sharing, kids are going to sneeze on each other I’m afraid), and that they will act on that.

I am very happy with nursery as I said Monday and Tuesday were fab. I was only there 2 hours so maybe handwashing is done regularly but I just didn’t see it. I’m annoyed with the fact we’re both ill now and 99% sure it was due to interactions with this child. DH and other kids are fine and only difference is me and LO went to nursery.

Your child caught a cold at nursery (maybe from a child with a snotty nose who sneezed) and you're annoyed?

I'm unsure if this is a joke?

Really, a Covid fest for a runny nose? I'm really quite on it with all the Covid and hygiene etc but I think that's dramatic. Runny nose is a cold! It's best they get some colds and their immune systems back up and running. It's not the end of the world, albeit gross AF

@burritofan LOL!!!!

It feels like end of world to me unfortunately as I haven’t worked for over 5 years so already have anxiety about going. On top of this settling in won’t be done so my youngest can’t go into nursery it looks like. MIL is taking eldest to school and looking after 2nd one do I cannot ask her to take my one year old too. I’m feeling very overwhelmed on what to do. I cannot ask for a week off as soon as I start a new job to settle my child in! This could have been avoided if the ill child hadn’t come in till symptoms were gone. It’s not normal times. Even on the nursery website it says DO NOT BRING CHILD IN IF COLD:FLU SYMPTOMS.

Like pp have said my ds spent the 1st year at nursery with a constant cold. Dd was the same but with sickness bugs. Ds hasn't been to nursery since March and has been well the whole time but I'm fully expecting him to be ill within a couple of days when he starts back in September.
The good news with dd was that by the time she started school her immune system meant that she was rarely ill, I'm hoping ds will be the same

So shall I ignore instructions in nursery website and take my LO in on Tuesday you think so I can start my job when I’m supposed to otherwise I can’t leave him in nursery without a settling in period.

Ah ok, so children with snotty noses cannot attend nursery.

Totally rational

Might give him today n tomorrow to rest and take Tuesday

If your other children have been to nursery you will know that at nursery they constantly catch a cold! Since all the other children have come back (my LO has been there throughout the whole Covid situation) my LO has had two colds in 4 weeks and had none throughout the pandemic! I know for a fact they wash her hands regularly and they don’t let parents in classrooms etc. but kids constantly sneeze with their mouths uncovered, fingers in mouth etc. If people kept children off nursery for colds there’d never be anyone in! Make sure it’s not covid and then be prepared for your next cold in around 2-3 weeks time!

@HeyBlaby have u even read my post? Obviously not just a bloody snooty nose:

1. coughing
2. sneezing
3. obvious high temperature as face was red and mother told me it’s teething - might not have written this one on OP

@Alison421e I apologise, I have seen you had put the child was coughing.

Thank you everyone can you please help me now with deciding:

1. send my LO in Monday to complete settling in
2. wait until Covid result is back - this will delay settling and means I will have to ask for time off in a brand new job. I’ve been sahm for 5 years so not a good start!
3. anything else I haven’t thought of

Final thoughts on speaking to nursery or not? Thanks