If you're one of those magical "put together" people...

[overweightcat]

How do you do it?

I mean people that seem to be on the ball with most parts of their life, on time 99% of the time, never forget stuff, organised, in shape, great hair that's usually down and very rarely thrown up in a bun, great skin, well suited clothes, clean house, home cooked meals 90% of the time even if you both work, young DCs who don't look like they've been dragged through a hedge backwards after 5 mins of arriving somewhere, always fairly relaxed and never too frazzled.

I know a few people / couples personally and I'm always really impressed with how they seem to have it sussed out.
Don't get me wrong I know people have issues and can go through stuff behind closed doors and some of the couples I know have gone through all sorts of hardships but they are all generally lovely and you can pop down to see them anytime and there won't be a difference between them in the comfort of their own house or in public IYKWIM?

What magic is this? Are you just on it 24/7? Or are you just very good at organisation?
Do you have tips for a wannabe like me?

I look like shit, but manage the organised stuff. Half way to perfection I guess

I have amazing hair. It’s thick and wavy and it looks like I’ve had a salon blow dry after 10 minutes with a Revlon blow dry brush thingy. There rest of the stuff I’m rubbish at, but I don’t care because my hair is so amazing.

This post is really helping me! Thank you

I knew a lovely lady with 3 children. Very organised. All the children spoke a second language and played an instrument. All meals were home cooked she didn't even buy a quick cake!
She worked part time, her house was absolutely immaculate. Her gardens were pristine. Her children were well behaved and had beautiful manners.

Then, all her hair fell out with the stress and we all realised the enormous strain she was under.

I on the other hand would rock up at school with spare non uniform permanently in my boot because I never knew when it was non uniform day......
I was never organised.

@planningaheadtoday but emergency mufti in the boot is an excellent idea! Forward thinking!

I haven't read the whole thread.

I do have a tidy house and home-cooked meals and never late and always organised. I mostly look presentable too.

I honestly think it's down to natural organisation/tidiness. I don't procrastinate. I have lots of lists. My mother is much the same.

Things like I have a permanent stash of gift wrap and birthday cards - I bulk buy things like this.

I use a paper diary and tend to book appts in advance. I put birthdays and school term dates etc in there at the start of the year. I also put reminders in eg cat wormer due, book eye test.

But I think it comes naturally to be me to be like this. I can't take any credit. I put things away not down. I clean the house to a loose schedule so that things get done at regular intervals (laundry every day, food shop on Mon, clean bathrooms on Tues, that sort of thing).

But - huge disclaimer - I work part-time not FT. And my children are not tiny, so they also have to do their chores.

If both of us were working FT I think it would come crashing down (or we'd just not have any family time at weekends).

I find being disorganised/mess stresses me, so I prioritise this stuff. I hate clutter so regularly take a bag to the charity shop.

What I’ve taken from this thread is that I need to sit down less!

Interesting how a number of people cite coping mechanisms due to their lack of organisation (emergency mufti being one) which would appear highly organised to a casual viewer! We are our own harshest critics...

I* don’t care because my hair is so amazing*

A hairdresser once told me "if your hair isn't right nothing is right"!

That was @SarahBellam quote but I had a bold fail. Obviously because my hair is a frizzy mess!

It's true about hair and now mine is one length and I've found the perfect frizz control product ( which has all taken me years to work out and deal with ) I'm a bit happier when it's washed and looking presentable with the odd foil colour and a trim every 7 weeks . My hair has been the bane of my life over the years though and I did have dreadful perms in the 80s and 90s which really were a mistake! Still have bad hair days , but it's a bit less these days. Wavy thick hair can be a pain.
(Can't use box colours without a reaction which I put down to the menopause and change in hormones! )
I'm more organized now the children are adults : was never that great when they were little and mostly used to wing it!
I do like a reasonably tidy home though.

@The80sweregreat what is the magical product?

Great thread. I am one of those frazzled people. Others say I’m dealing with loads but I constantly feel I’m chasing my tail and getting nowhere! It has improved recently (ADHD meds mean I’m less scatterbrained) but in some ways I’m just more aware of what I struggle with 😂

I recently drew a big mind map of all the things I need to keep track of. And I’m now on a mission to delegate as much as possible - mostly to automated things as we have no family support etc. Little things like using subscribe and save for things we run out of (IF it works out cheaper), using prescription delivery service, better routines and organisation of things that get lost a lot, using phone/Alexa reminders etc.

Pre lockdown I was getting quite good at being my “future friend” a la TOMM - sorting certain things like clothes and bags for the next day, having meds right by my bed so I didn’t forget etc. Lost my way a bit as I had nothing to get out of the house for but I’m trying to get back to it!

The hair product I'm using came part of a set in the M and S beauty bag (with other products) which I treated myself to this summer.
It is 'Percy and Reed volumising no oil oil'
I use a tiny bit on towel dried hair then blow dry. No idea how much it costs to buy separately but a tiny amount goes a long way and it doesnt make my hair feel oily.

I wouldn’t say I’m ‘in shape’ or particularly glam, I don’t care about that stuff. I dye and cut my own hair and do my own nails etc. However, I have worked full time my entire parenting career. I don’t have a show home due to having a large family with a lot of pets, however I could invite someone in without panicking. I put this down to a)working in administration for 20 years, and b)having a useless husband for 12 years, and c) having a child with SEN so life has to be planned out. My mental load is ginormous. I always have to be four steps ahead. I cook every night, we don’t miss appointments, I’m never late for work. I’m just always thinking of the next lot of things that need organising so nothing ever gets missed. I’m also a massive fan of The List. Nothing beats the satisfaction of crossing off a list!

Thanks @The80sweregreat I'll have a look for that. Hope springs eternal...

The one thing that really stands out for me from this thread is how early people get up!

I once had a job where I had to get up between 5.30-6.30 am every day, I felt sick and ill the entire time, even when I got enough sleep. I just can't function and not feel sick before 7.30, I don't know why.

I think understanding that it actually isn't a big deal for some people to be organized- and they do it quite naturally, helps- I am not this person, and can only force organization on myself through lists and so on, but it's not intrinsic, I can't remember where the list is and I frequently forget to look at my calendar and double-book, I'm trying to change this habit. But I will never become my best friend whose house and career and child are all terribly well organized, just because, and that's fine. We are not all the same. I do have nice hair though.

Love all the suggestions on this, it's been so helpful to see how everyone manages their time and organisation! I wake up early but still struggle with planning and organising things. The one thing I do well is to buy cards, presents and wrapping paper bits all in advance. Also have a stash of plain envelopes and stamps.

Did anyone else read this and make a ‘how to be organised list’?

Thank you, it’s really helpful. I’m not naturally organised but more a wanna be. I’m getting there.

There rest of the stuff I’m rubbish at, but I don’t care because my hair is so amazing.
^^

Quite!

@Yankathebear I'm planning to make a list but I haven't yet been organised enough to do it!

I think it's down to either lots of support, or the willingness to spend more time/money/effort on it than the rest of us. Also, some people just have a need to feel and look very in control and immaculate. Probably all down to their upbringing.

Sounds like an imaginary person to me! I've never met anyone like that. People can seem like that on the surface, but dig a bit and you'll find their struggles and flaws just like everyone else.

Everything goes in my calendar with reminder set the day before. Cleaning: I don't do a set 3hour blitz because I have the attention span of a gnat. I do bits as I go along so wipe surfaces or kitchen cupboards while kettle boils. Hoover one room in the ad break of a film or Corrie . Leave every room as I find it with a 2min whip round as I leave, for coffee cups,plates,books,cat toys etc. Then it gets automatic & doesn't feel like 'work'. Hair: i make the next appt at end of every appt & calenderise. Takes 2mins to straighten each morning.Daily makeup is just foundation,lip balm & mascara. Blusher & lippy only if at work. I'm naturally organised, I hate chaos because everything takes longer & is a hassle & I have no patience.

The key with your hair is having the right cut and colour, and knowing what products you need and suit your hair...it's trial and error really. For instance I know now that I need a clarifying shampoo,NO conditioner and my needed products are dry shampoo, hairspray and texturising spray. Anything more than that is a waste of my time.
Other tips are;
Go to bed at a decent time!!
Get up early and give yourself time to get ready for the day- mentally and physically
Clean AS YOU GO, I don't have to spend all Saturday cleaning because I do little and often as I'm going.
I get as much as I can sorted the night before.
I organise everything in my house-EVERYTHING has its place.
I get my eyelashes and eyebrows tinted and shaped every 6weeks- this saves me a lot of morning make up time!!
Make up- less is more but use good products that last on your face.
Clothing- classic pieces that last are best and when I buy a piece it must complement and go with at least 3 other items in my wardrobe, otherwise it's not worth it. My wardrobe is a capsule as that's what works best for me. I could get dressed with my eyes closed and it would all go together BUT the main key/secret to looking put together is actually ACCESSORIES- shoes and belts and bags that match/complement are always great.
For example- jeans and a cream jumper is lovely but nicer if you add a tan belt and tan boots and a nice bracelet or little necklaces.