Step son allergic to cat

[CatNappers]

DSS has developed an allergy to our cats (2). It's only a recent thing in the last year, he never seemed to have a problem before.

DH is determined that we are rehoming them. I don't want to.

His argument is that his son is suffering and he's not having it. Which I understand, however, my argument is that DSS is always letting them sleep on his bed!

I've said time and time again we need to keep the bedroom door closed. I've gone to buy night lights so we can close the door at night, I've said I'll wash the sheets more regularly (just do them after normal amount of time atm) and was going to go this weekend to buy a 'top sheet' which we could put over each morning and take off each night to keep the sheets underneath fresh.

However, neither DH or DSS ever remember to close the bedroom door and so every day when I go past after they've got up or DSS has been in his room, the cat goes on the bed and then DSS suffers.

I don't know what to do. It really doesn't sit right with me just getting rid of an animal we committed to having (and which I love and the kids do too) before we've actually made an effort to do something about it i.e. being vigilant with keeping the bedroom doors closed.

He's now suggested we get an insulated shed in the garden with a few cat beds, blankets etc... And see if the cats will sleep in there at night and not let them in the house anymore.

I don't want SS to be ill but at the same time I feel like no one is making any effort to help themselves and every suggestion I make is just shot down with 'we won't remember to do that' or 'it just won't work'. I feel like he just wants the easy way out which is to get rid of them.

I don't want to re-home them.

I developed an allergy to our cat after a couple of years or 18 month. I have to keep her out of my bedroom full stop and take a daily antihistamine. As well as keeping on top of the dusting and hoovering.

My friend developed a mild allergy and rubbed every cat she found on her face. It oddly helped and the allergy went. Never tried it though.

Bullshit bangdown:

@Tinyhumansurvivalist

allergies get worse.
Eh? Not usually Pet allergies don't carry the risk of anaphylaxis either.

My dd is allergic to certain types of dogs. Repeated exposure to them could cause an anaphylaxis reaction which could be fatal. Incredibly rare. So rare it's never happened, to be honest.

could be fatal Anaphylaxis IS fatal if it isn't treated. Always. I take it your DD has an epipen 24/7 and you set alerts everywhere she goes? Thought not.

@mnhq please confirm I'm not the same poster as the previous cat allergy thread. I agree it's odd that there has been a similar thread recently but it genuinely was not me.

@gamerchick I wouldn’t recommend it. My tortie would take your face off if you tried that.

The cat skin will be floating around the house doesn’t matter how many times she hovers or changes the bed. . I’m convinced this poster posted a couple of weeks ago and got her arse handed to her on a plate. Because she knew her dds had a allergy before she got them.

Expecting a child to take medication because an adult wants a pet is selfish and ridiculous.

[quote Wolfiefan]@gamerchick I wouldn’t recommend it. My tortie would take your face off if you tried that. [/quote]
I wasn't recommending it but it tickled me a bit when she told me. The picture of all those surprised cats

I can see the theory in it though.

Why can he not just take an antihistamine? It’s hardly “medication”. Tons of kids take antihistamines for allergies like hayfever.

I would make sure all avenues are exhausted before you rehome the cats. Or - if you really can’t, see if a friend can take them, family member? I would literally never rehome my cat unless not doing so would make me homeless but if I had to I would make sure he was going to a home I knew, rather than a rescue centre.

Allergies can crop up at any point I think. I never had hayfever before last summer and now I get it quite badly and have to take antihistamines every day. If, as OP says, she didn’t know DSS had allergies before she got the cats then I think it’s really only fair the family work together to try and find a solution.

Also it seems like your DSS would be upset if the cats got rehomed so this should be taken into consideration too.

I did not buy these cats after I knew about DSSs allergies. We have had them for a long time. We got them because the children asked for them ages ago, they aren't my cats from before my husband, I am not the same poster as this other thread people keep mentioning.

I care about my step son, his allergy is mild and I am trying (I am the only one who is actually) to help it before having to take the step of rehoming which my step son would also be heartbroken over.

I am not against the idea of rehoming I just wanted to try other options first, not just for me. I have allergies myself and I manage them fine by not sleeping in bed with cats and keeping the house dust free/taking AHs when the pollen count is up.

DSS is fine until he is in bed. He is not suffering all day long, it so very much confined to his bedding where the cats sleep. I am trying to minimise that to see if it helps but no one is making any effort to assist me with that.

If it comes to it I will re home I just want to know we've all done what we can first, which DSS would agree with if he understood how serious his dad was about getting rid of them.

DH has never really liked the cats, he thinks they are 'pointless' pets so it doesn't surprise me that the first opportunity to get rid of them he wants to take without doing anything else first.

@Supersimkin2

Bullshit bangdown:

@Tinyhumansurvivalist

allergies get worse.
Eh? Not usually Pet allergies don't carry the risk of anaphylaxis either.

My dd is allergic to certain types of dogs. Repeated exposure to them could cause an anaphylaxis reaction which could be fatal. Incredibly rare. So rare it's never happened, to be honest.

could be fatal Anaphylaxis IS fatal if it isn't treated. Always. I take it your DD has an epipen 24/7 and you set alerts everywhere she goes? Thought not.

Yes they do..and have for my dd who is under a specialist for thus and other allergies. Hope that helps you down off your high horse

[quote CatNappers]@mnhq please confirm I'm not the same poster as the previous cat allergy thread. I agree it's odd that there has been a similar thread recently but it genuinely was not me.[/quote]
This won't work, but if you report your own post then they will have a look at it and intervene if they need to.

Petal Cleanse is great stuff. I was allergic to my first lakie, and it really helped.

I'm allergice to cats too, but when I had cats of my own, I only reacted to other people's cats. I think I must have gradually become desensitised to my own.

Piriton and a spray like Beconase or Boots own-brand equivalent (providing their safe for U-18s) at night should really help.

You need to teach everyone to 'wet' dust before and during SS visits. Cats must be kept out of the bedroom, possible remove all carpets and curtains(if the cats like windowsills like mine do)
We have a cat free spare room- they know they aren't allowed in and will try every time the door is left open.

You need to have a serious talk with the whole family about this.
If they want the cats to stay then things need to change.
Can SS take antihistamine while with you?

I haven't read the full thread, but the rescue we got our cats from recommends petal cleanse that you put on the cats fur to help people that are having allergies to them. I can see you're trying to keep the cats out of DSS's room too and that would seem to be a good idea. If it does come to rehoming, go through a rescue who will do decent home checks. Good luck

www.amazon.co.uk/PetalCleanse-Small-Animal-Treatment-350ml/dp/B019IO93V0?tag=mumsnetforu03-21

This article also has some useful info on managing cat allergies www.cats.org.uk/oxford/feature-pages/living-with-cat-allergies

I'm allergic to cats. Nothing you are suggesting would make it possible to even come in your house.

I'm with your husband. Meds don't help me at all, I have to avoid cats and its getting worse.

You are doing all the right things op and it is a shame that your dh and dss aren't helping at all. Rehoming pets should be a last resort. It is a light allergy so if the cat was kept out of the room then it wouldn't be an issue. Can you get a device that makes the door close, ridiculous step to come to. Otherwise you could set the cats up in the kitchen or other suitable room at night.

My ex is allergic to cats which set off his asthma and other reactions depending on contact i.e scratches but he still insists on having a cat for a pet, he makes it work.

SS does come in our house fine. He remains fine until he gets in his bed.

@Disfordarkchocolate the child takes the cats in bed with him! He obviously not only can live there , but wants the cats with him!

Hi OP, you’ve said a number of time’s your Step sons allergies are mild. I think people need to
Start reading these threads.

I got my cat almost 4 years ago. I realised very soon I was allergic to her, wheezing, sneezing, itchy eyes, blocked nose the whole lot. I didn’t give her away because honestly I think that’s a shitty thing to do (this of course DOES NOT include more serious life threatening allergies).

I kept her And struggled a little bit took daily antihistamines and now 4 years on, my allergies have improved. I can’t rub my face in her fur and need to wash my hands after stroking her but allergies have improved Drastically. It’s like another person said on here, her friend had a mild cat allergy And would rub her face in cat fur and it’s a lot better.

Also similar to how drs used to say pregnant women should not eat peanuts while pregnant as it could encourage allergies /intolerances but now advice has changed and they are saying to eat them as it can potentially help the baby from developing allergies. Once again of course this DOES NOT mean people who have serious allergies.

I really don’t see why the cats should be rehomed if someone has a mild allergy. They need to be washing their hands and like you said close their bedroom door amongst other things to help themselves and you/partner can hoover regularly wash bed clothes as you have suggested.

Also The allergy may be as a result of dust mites and not the cats if hes only struggling in bed.

Give his bedroom a good dusting/ hoovering , Turn over his mattress and wash his curtains/ bedcovers pillows etc

• DSS will still happily let them sleep on his bed despite me saying until I'm blue in the face that he needs to stop doing that and remember to close his door so they can't get on the sheets.

He literally gets them under the covers with him and cuddles them some times!*

For the people at the back, hard of reading or just putting their own spin on the situation.

Dear god the drama llamas are out tonight!
The 11 year old youth has a mild allergy that doesn't cause keeling over, asthma or even shortness of breath!
Op give him an antihistamine and tell him to stop mauling the bloody cat if he doesn't want to be sneezy. I find ceterazine better than loretadine as it doesn't usually cause drowsiness, I've been taking it 41 years and I'm still here side effect may be grumpiness at hysterical people

I had a similar problem and the solution was an automatic door closer. It only cost £8.99. You screw one end to the wall and the other to the door and the door closes slowly but competely by itself.

Problem solved!

This is about the level of my allergy. I have a cat but fortunately she doesn't try to get under my covers.

Two things keep on top of it - I take an antihistamine if I get itchy eyes, maybe once or twice a month. The other thing that works well is Petal Cleanse - you wipe it on the cat and it reduces the cat dander. Worth a try?

Op, you still haven't said whether or not he has actually been tested for allergies. Has he?