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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be peeved that my kids refuse to be tested for Covid!

300 replies

sadpapercourtesan · 14/08/2020 11:45

We've been asked to be part of the testing programme as a family - we'd be tested every week for 5 weeks, then every month for 12 months. DH and I want to do it, particularly the antibody test as we'd like to know whether we've got immunity. Our boys (16 and nearly 18) refuse; DS1 doesn't fancy the nose swab and DS2 says he'd rather not know! So that's that Sad

Obviously it's their choice to make, but I'm peeved that DH and I won't get to participate now, as it has to be the whole family. Grrr.

OP posts:
pippistrelle · 14/08/2020 12:15

Yes, I'd be peeved too because it could offer you peace of mind as you go about your business. But teenagers often think they're immortal and to be fair, as far as Covid-19 is concerned, the chances of a less than positive outcome are tiny, tiny, tiny for them. They're also not noted, on the whole, for their altruism.

NailsNeedDoing · 14/08/2020 12:18

The swans are horrible, I don’t blame them! You can always pay for your own antibodies test.

hula008 · 14/08/2020 12:19

particularly the antibody test as we'd like to know whether we've got immunity.

The antibody test won't tell you if you have immunity, just whether you have antibodies.

VainAbigail · 14/08/2020 12:19

I wouldn’t even try and force this on my 12 and 14yr olds, let alone older kids. As much as it might be peace of mind, and I get why you’re peeved, I think you’re being a bit unreasonable.

Raindancer411 · 14/08/2020 12:20

I don't blame them, the test is horrible. Especially if you are easily sick or suffer nose bleeds easily

AllPlayedOut · 14/08/2020 12:20

YABVU. I don't blame them at all. The test is horrible.

BluebellForest836 · 14/08/2020 12:20

I don’t blame them.

Crazycakelady17 · 14/08/2020 12:22

I don’t blame them my 10 yo dd had the test a few weeks ago she hated the swab and was sick after the throat one as she gagged not envy

Pebblexox · 14/08/2020 12:23

Yabu. My one year had to have the test due to being hospitalised with symptoms and I would not put her through that test again unless she had symptoms.
I get your frustration but it's an awful test to have to do, especially at home by yourself. If they don't want it, then good for them.
Also the antibody test will not tell you if you're immune, just if you've had the virus. That doesn't automatically mean immunity to it.

Wondergirl100 · 14/08/2020 12:30

blimey total over exaggeration of the test - yes giving it to a 5 yr old was a joke but for an adult it's 10 seconds of discomfort and a 12 yr old is capable of understanding that.

Honestly I think it's very selfish of them.

EatsShootsAndRuns · 14/08/2020 12:33

The test is painful. I certainly wouldn't want to have it done again.

angstridden2 · 14/08/2020 12:35

Just been tested.it was fine, tickled a bit that’s all.

NailsNeedDoing · 14/08/2020 12:35

How is it selfish? They aren’t denying anyone anything. I disagree that it’s selfish of them, but even if it were, I think it’s ok to be selfish when it comes to having oversized cotton buds shoved down your throat and up your nose.

AllPlayedOut · 14/08/2020 12:36

Honestly I think it's very selfish of them.

I think it's selfish to expect your children to offer themselves up as lab rats.

I assume that you've taken part in clinical trials?

CrunchyCarrot · 14/08/2020 12:53

At 16 and 18 years old, they're old enough to make up their own minds. Shame that doesn't align with what you were hoping for, but it's all part of becoming independent adults.

TildaTurnip · 14/08/2020 12:55

We had a letter inviting our 5 year old to do this. No chance. He had to be tested after having a temperature and it was horrible.

Sunflowerlover20 · 14/08/2020 12:59

How can anyone say it’s selfish!

It’s THEIR body and if they don’t want to then it’s up to them! Angry

SmilingAloe · 14/08/2020 13:04

That is frustrating.
I do not understand people saying the test is bad. My whole family was tested last week. It doesn’t hurt at all, it tickles a bit up the nose and is momentarily uncomfortable at the back of the throat, that’s it. And it’s over in seconds.
My ds 9 and 11 were absolutely fine with it and would happily have it done again as necessary.

luckylavender · 14/08/2020 13:06

Antibody test doesn't prove immunity

katy1213 · 14/08/2020 13:08

They're old enough to make their own decision. If you want a test, you can pay for it.

AlwaysInMay · 14/08/2020 13:08

Is it definitely swab testing? I've had both swab and saliva tests and the saliva tests were much easier.

howlathebees · 14/08/2020 13:09

It’s their choice

AnneTwacky · 14/08/2020 13:09

I agree with Sunflower.

Their bodies = their right to withhold consent to be used in clinical trials. Not selfish of them at all.

AllPlayedOut · 14/08/2020 13:09

do not understand people saying the test is bad.

I could say I don't understand people saying that it isn't,. Everyone I know who has had it found it awful. It made them gag and some found it painful. Some people seem to be rougher than others but then we all experience things differently, You could take twenty people and give them the same procedure or experience and their opinion of that experience would be unique for every one.

FinnyStory · 14/08/2020 13:12

DS1 was invited to have a one off test as part if government research. I did suggest that as he'd benefited from the furlough scheme it was his civic duty to participate for the greater good but I didn't win.

His reluctance was because now he's gone back to work he's unpaid if he has to isolate and if blissfully unaware but asymptomatic he can continue to work. If asymptomatic with a positive test, he'd naturally, have to isolate. So there is actually a potential cost to participating.