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AIBU?

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Original poster

This obsession with blue eyes! Anyone else?

451 replies

Lelophants · 13/08/2020 10:44

Honestly, I know it's a minor thing but it's really starting to annoy me! 🤣

Dh and I both have hazel eyes. We are white but more olivey skin (not that it matters!) Ds is the spitting image of me as a baby and his eyes are still that changeable very dark blue/brown colour, but looks dark in most lights. He has basically the same eyes I did as a baby and most of the time they look hazel, but I guess they haven't quite set yet. Mine didn't set until 1. He is 9 months. (Other babies we know with blue eyed parents have proper blue eyes - ds has never looked very blue!) Also neither DH or myself are blue!!

Pil are both blue and hazel eyed and mil is the blue eyed one and is obsessed that our baby will have blue eyes! Every time she visits (maybe 6 or 7 times now) it's "his eyes look blue! Are they blue?" Then looks disappointed when we say no. I'm not kidding. Every time she comes in! I actually have an intake of breath now. She then makes the odd comment of "well they look blue to me." as if I'm making it up. Confused

I actually find it quite offensive. Dark eyes are attractive you know! Her son has them! And ds has my eyes!
She even made some comment about how her other son has blue eyes and how beautiful they are.

Anyone else have people like this? Blue eyes are no nicer than dark eyes. Hazel eyes are beautiful thank you very much!

OP posts:
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9
strawberryplanting · 13/08/2020 11:30

@ShinyMe

It's only because blue eyes are so rare.
Blue eyes aren't rare, at least not in the uk, 48% of people in the UK have blue eyes
Skyliner001 · 13/08/2020 11:30

@TheAquaticDuchess

It's only because blue eyes are so rare.

The ‘rareness’ of blue eyes depends on where you live. World wide, it’s about 8% of people. In the U.K., however, it’s about 48% of people, so not rare at all. Green eyes are the second most common in the U.K. at 30% (I think this figure includes hazel eyes), and brown eyes the rarest at 22%.

Yes, I have to say I was speaking globally.
TomNook · 13/08/2020 11:31

Green are way sexier

BlingLoving · 13/08/2020 11:32

My family all have blue eyes and they're generally a very bright gorgeous blue - we have all been stopped by random people to comment and my dad still gets comments on his eyes and he's in his 80s.

I have to admit, it was hard for me to accept that my children were very unlikely to have the family eyes and when they both came out with startling blue eyes, there was a brief period of hope that quickly faded. As it turns out, while all three of my dad's children have his eyes, not a single one of his grandchildren do. I do have 1 nephew with blue eyes, but they're much more similar to his dad's than my sister.

However, MY DC have beautiful eyes. DS' defy description in terms of colour. The closest way to describe them is as grey with hints of green and brown. DD has dark brown eyes that are just beautiful.

Just remind her that Van Morrison didn't sing about a blue=eyed girl....

FlamingoAndJohn · 13/08/2020 11:32

@Chanjer

Although blue eyes and black hair

oof

Hello! Blue eyes, pale as snow, very dark hair.
Downthegarden · 13/08/2020 11:34

@ShinyMe

It's only because blue eyes are so rare.
Blue is the most common colour in the UK
UntilYourNextHairBrainedScheme · 13/08/2020 11:37

Blue eyes aren't rate at all in the UK and Europe.

They're less common than brown globally but common as muck in Europe. Even globally it's about 8% of the population which is hardly rare!

Green and grey eyes are both rare.

She just wants to claim the baby for her "side" of the family. My mother is the same and seems unable to acknowledge her grandchildren have 4 grandparents - even though she's happily married to my father the grandchildren could only take after her, her siblings, her parents, her cousins, her great uncle...

TheLovleyChebbyMcGee · 13/08/2020 11:39

My MIL is a bit like this, always comparing my DS to her other son, ie, not my DH, buy my Dh's brother (aka The Golden Child)

Always going on about how much DS is like his DUncle. Yep, you've guessed it, DH and his DB are quite similar, but she just never says that. We're LC with DS uncle as he lives faraway and is generally a waster, not my words.

DS is just the spit of DH, I cant see any of him in me at all, inheritence is such a strange thing!

PyongyangKipperbang · 13/08/2020 11:39

I have one with ice blue eyes and dark dark brown hair. It is quite an unusual combination so I do like that she has it, especially as my grandmother had the same combo. All the others are either brown or green (like me).

There does seem to be an association with attractiveness with blue eyes, but I dont know why!

QueenofLouisiana · 13/08/2020 11:40

I’m blue-eyed, DH has gorgeous dark brown eyes. DS got DH’s eyes and they are beautiful.

AllTheWhoresOfMalta · 13/08/2020 11:41

Interesting! I thought that I was the only one with one of these bonkers relatives.

I have green eyes, as does my mum, and my dad has blue eyes. My sister has blue eyes too, so we are all in the blue eyed “family”. My husband has one blue eye and one brown eye (like David Bowie!) and when I was pregnant my elderly grandmother (also blue eyed) was obsessed with what colour our baby’s eyes would be. She kept going on about the potential brown eyed gene “muddying” the gene pool but was comforted by my husbands blonde hair and thought that might sway it (he has one blue eyed and one brown eyed parent). It was a tiny bit mad and verging on Hitler-style Aryan race nonsense.

In the end both our girls are blonde and DD1 has hazel eyes and DD2 has green eyes. Both very lovely colours, but my Granny has been put out by the fact that DD1s are verging a bit too close to brown for her liking, like she’s some thoroughbred cat rather than a human. I wouldn’t mind, but it’s not like my side of the family are some well-bred people with a proud lineage going back hundreds of years to aristocracy, if I was a cat I would absolutely be a moggie with all kinds of genetic anomalies in there. My Gran acts like she’s the Queen and my husband has dragged his commoner genes up the branches of the family tree 😂

YourObedientServant · 13/08/2020 11:41

My DS has pure black thick hair, very pale white skin and the biggest, bluest eyes I've ever seen with inch long eyelashes like brushes. I know I'm biased but he is honestly stunning. Wink

I don't really understand inherited eye colours much. I have bright green, DH grey, DS bright blue and DD dark brown...

thecatsthecats · 13/08/2020 11:43

There are beautiful and bland eyes of every colour. My eyes can vary between dishwater blue and a bright blue, and a cornflower blue according to what colour I've dyed my hair.

Come to think of it, I can't think of any animal species that have brown eyes.

(My favourite eye colour is gold, which you see in cats.)

lovesdaisy · 13/08/2020 11:44

is this just a MIL thing? Mine is the same, my son has really bright blue eyes and my 6 month old daughter has darker blue eyes and she literally mentions her eye colour everytime she sees her and has even said it’s shame you don’t have your brothers eye colour to her which made me feel a bit weird - I personally don’t care at all about their eye colour!

DullDullWeather · 13/08/2020 11:45

Don't think blue eyes are that rare

Green on the other hand . DD has green eyes (Me and her brothers have dark brown, her Dad has hazel) as does my Mum and my DDs other Granny . My Nan also had green.

vickibee · 13/08/2020 11:46

I have blue eyes and hadn't realised they were rare. I also have almost black hair so they look odd

thenightsky · 13/08/2020 11:47

DH and both DC have dark brown eyes. I'm the only pale blue eyed one. I think brown are much better looking and more photogenic. My eyes look eerily like a Malamute dog.

GisAFag · 13/08/2020 11:48

I habe Green, i love being one of only 2% of the worlds population. DS has grey, DD brown

IggyAce · 13/08/2020 11:48

She sounds annoying. I’ve got dark blue eyes and my dh has deep brown my ds has the same eyes as dh deep chocolate pools, absolutely stunning they are imo. Your dcs eyes sound similar to my dd and they took around 2 years to settle but hers still change depending on mood and she’s nearly 14! Hers are a hazel grey hint of blue.

Emeraldshamrock · 13/08/2020 11:53

I love deep brown eyes. Green is unusual. Both of mine have grey blue they change in shade slightly like DP's.
I have hazel brown.

HoppingPavlova · 13/08/2020 11:54

I don’t think it’s about the eye colour as such. She is just excited as she is looking/hoping for a bit of herself reflected in her grandchild which is normal. You seem a bit overly sensitive about it.

I have one that always causes excitement in our family. Both DH and I have blue eyes. Both of our families have only had blue eyes going back to our great grandparents as a definite and probably further. Not one brown eye whatsoever in either family for several generations. And we have one with brown eyes. For 20 odd years they have been a source of great excitement at any family get-together, ‘come here and bring those beautiful eyes with you’ etc. I don’t think that child is valued or lived any more than the others, it’s just a source of novelty which is understandable.

Emeraldshamrock · 13/08/2020 11:54

Don't think blue eyes are that rare
Me either.

Original poster
Lelophants · 13/08/2020 11:55

Haha glad it's not just me!

@HoppingPavlova she just won't stop going on it's getting a bit boring! 😂

OP posts:
Original poster
Lelophants · 13/08/2020 11:56

I once had a blue eyed friend say she was worried her kids wouldn't have blue eyes because her boyfriend was so dark and Iooled at her like Hmm
She then remembered I had dark eyes!

I do think blue eyes are lovely BTW. Just not at the expense of others!

OP posts:
dontgobaconmyheart · 13/08/2020 11:56

Ignore her OP, her internalised prejudices and desperate need for validation and inclusion are showing and neither reflect particularly well.