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Original poster

This obsession with blue eyes! Anyone else?

451 replies

Lelophants · 13/08/2020 10:44

Honestly, I know it's a minor thing but it's really starting to annoy me! 🤣

Dh and I both have hazel eyes. We are white but more olivey skin (not that it matters!) Ds is the spitting image of me as a baby and his eyes are still that changeable very dark blue/brown colour, but looks dark in most lights. He has basically the same eyes I did as a baby and most of the time they look hazel, but I guess they haven't quite set yet. Mine didn't set until 1. He is 9 months. (Other babies we know with blue eyed parents have proper blue eyes - ds has never looked very blue!) Also neither DH or myself are blue!!

Pil are both blue and hazel eyed and mil is the blue eyed one and is obsessed that our baby will have blue eyes! Every time she visits (maybe 6 or 7 times now) it's "his eyes look blue! Are they blue?" Then looks disappointed when we say no. I'm not kidding. Every time she comes in! I actually have an intake of breath now. She then makes the odd comment of "well they look blue to me." as if I'm making it up. Confused

I actually find it quite offensive. Dark eyes are attractive you know! Her son has them! And ds has my eyes!
She even made some comment about how her other son has blue eyes and how beautiful they are.

Anyone else have people like this? Blue eyes are no nicer than dark eyes. Hazel eyes are beautiful thank you very much!

OP posts:
Thread gallery
9
winniestone37 · 14/08/2020 22:30

She wants to feel connected to baby. You’ll have loads more things like this over the years so best to get a thick skin and just ignite it. Don’t even acknowledge it 👌🏼🤷‍♀️

nokidshere · 14/08/2020 22:44

I don't think it's at all unusual for people to want babies to have some of their own traits whichever side of the family they are on. My lovely, lovely MIL was always trying to see something of her son in our two, probably because they look a lot like me and my family. I certainly wasn't irritated by it. If it made her happy to think they looked at least a little bit like their dad what's the harm?

In my experience ALL grandparents look for traits that can be attributed to their side of the family. In laws can barely open their mouths in case they are seen to have an agenda, it's sad.

Angrywife · 14/08/2020 22:50

@Chanjer

Although blue eyes and black hair

oof

My husband has black hair & blue eyes. Freckles too 😍🥰
RangasNugget · 14/08/2020 23:21

I'm only new to loving blue eyes!
My son is mixed race ( white Aus/Fijian) with gorgeous brown eyes and very dark skin and he married a gorgeous Irish girl with blonde hair and blue eyes. Their Bubba, my most perfect grandbaby is white as can be with blonde hair and the darkest, deepest blue eyes you've ever seen. (I have hazel/green eyes ... Blue does run I'm both sides of the family but not that dark blue)

KarlKennedysDurianFruit · 14/08/2020 23:44

I was a bit obsessed with DS having blue eyes in that first year, I have blue/grey eyes and everyone in my family I am biologically related to on my mum's side and my dad's side have blue eyes in a variety of shades, so I suppose blue eyes equals family connection to me. Also he has DHs exact face, so I wanted a little something in there! He also got my curls and that makes me happy too.

Daftodil · 14/08/2020 23:46

What. On. Earth?! I genuinely did not know that eye colour preference was a thing. I don't think I could tell you what colour eyes some of my best friends have!

TrishTeres · 15/08/2020 07:17

Weirdly there was a question yesterday about Pil and hair comments. Makes me wonder if genuine people really do post these questions or if they are bait for responses. We may be blessed to be Pil ourselves one day. Let's hope our dils/sils magnanimous. Love does not easily "take offense"

sashh · 15/08/2020 07:29

Although blue eyes and black hair

oof

Oof? What do you mean?

Richard Armitage

Pandacub7 · 15/08/2020 07:55

Blue eyes are rare as they’re the less dominant strain. Brown are more common. Green is the rarest. Then again, my dad has blue, mum hazel and I have black eyes, which everyone seems fascinated by Grin

lilgreen · 15/08/2020 08:26

Most of my family have blue eyes. Never think of blue as rare.

Catwaving · 15/08/2020 08:29

Hazel are rare and really beautiful, don't know where the blue is better thing comes from.....green are really special too

Blue and brown are the most common I'd say

HandsOffMyRights · 15/08/2020 08:34

I have twins - one with blue and one with very dark brown, almost black eyes, like me. DH has grey/green
We have always had more comments regarding the blue eyes.

Franticbutterfly · 15/08/2020 09:55

@PuppyMonkey

Blue eyes and dark hair is definitely seen as an Irish thing I think. Had that all the life about my “Irish eyes.” Confused

I think if it’s really annoying you OP, the best thing to do is totally not react to it when she says it. Ignore, change the subject, move away so she can’t start a discussion about it. She might just get bored of mentioning it given a bit of time?

We all (DH, me, DC) have dark hair and blue eyes. We are from Irish backgrounds. I'd have been highly disappointed with any other colour because I love the blue.
Bluesheep8 · 15/08/2020 09:58

I'm half Irish, blue eyes and Black hair. My sister has red hair and blue eyes.

Caelano · 15/08/2020 10:08

I’ve never thought of blue eyes as ‘rare’ though of course globally, there aren’t as many as brown eyes. Having said that, dh has Scandinavian grandparents so blue eyes are pretty common in our family.
IMO hazel, green or true grey eyes are the really Beautiful unusual colours

ExtremelyBoldSquirrels · 15/08/2020 10:18

In my experience ALL grandparents look for traits that can be attributed to their side of the family

DS3’s eyes and many of his expressions look exactly like DH. Everyone in the hospital (he’s 12 days old) remarked that he looks just like his father. My mum commented on it too (when his eyes are open - she thinks he looks like DS1 as a baby when his eyes are closed, which is true).

But MIL? Nope. Total denial. He looks nothing like DH.

The weirdest thing is the she is generally obsessed with how much DH looks like her and how much DSD looks like them both. To the point of absurdity. But she seems absolutely against DS3 sharing any traits with his father.

I think that says more about my MIL than MILs in general.

sashh · 15/08/2020 10:46

What. On. Earth?! I genuinely did not know that eye colour preference was a thing. I don't think I could tell you what colour eyes some of my best friends have!

I have a game for you.

Count how many actors have green eyes. Once you start to notice it you will be surprised how many do.

And it's not just white actors.

But then I love eyes, I got talking to a woman in a pub a while back and said, "Oh your eyes are different colours! Sorry you already know that"

Apparently most people don't notice.

Middersweekly · 15/08/2020 12:56

My MIL insisted DH’s eyes were blue on a number of occasions even though they’re actually green/hazel like his Dads. Not sure why she insists they are blue?! I love DH’s Green eyes as not many people have them (something like 2%) he also has dark hair so they stand out. I have 4 DD’s and one has green eyes and the others have blue eyes the same as me.

Merryweather80 · 15/08/2020 13:00

Dd1 has almost aqua blue eyes very unusual colour blue. She gets a lot of people comment on how unusual and how pretty they are. She also has strawberry blonde hair. I have green eyes and ginger hair dh has browneyes brown hair. Here's the but that grates on my soul - people saying dd’s eyes and hair are a mix of mine and dh’s 😣 it's not possible! It's like genetics don't exist!!

FizzyGreenWater · 15/08/2020 13:30

DanniArthur your eyes just look a normal light blue-grey colour to me?!

Change17 · 15/08/2020 13:36

@FizzyGreenWater

DanniArthur your eyes just look a normal light blue-grey colour to me?!
Are you Deliberately trying to be unkind or are you just tactless?

FWIW danniarthur I think your eyes are absolutely beautiful and if it’s a feature of yours that you’re proud of and really like then that’s great. I don’t doubt I’d notice your eye colour were I having a conversation with you. They’re beautiful.

FizzyGreenWater · 15/08/2020 14:20

Change17, of course not!

Apologies, I thought this was a simple discussion and not a 'you're gorgeous hun!' thread Hmm - if it is, do feel free to ignore the below.

I guess it just shows how subjective are our descriptions of eye colour then. FWIW I just googled 'grey eyes' and got a load of images showing a range of colours including similar to the ones above, and then googled 'blue eyes' and pretty much got the same.

I suppose 'blue' through to 'grey' is just that continuum of the lighter (non-pigmented) eye.

DanniArthur · 15/08/2020 15:01

Thank you Change17 that's nice of you to say.
FizzyGreenWater there's no need to be obtuse. I often get compliments about my bright eyes IRL and certainly didnt post the photo to get compliments like you insinuate. I do think they are bright by comparison to my DP's eyes and posted merely in response to the unusual red hair/ blue eye comments. Obviously everyone is entitled to their own opinions but you did come across a bit rude there.

Bluesheep8 · 15/08/2020 16:09

I don't think fizzygreenwater was rude though. That eye colour is exactly what I'd expect to see on a thread about blue eyes. It's a photo of blue eyes.

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