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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To tell school they're just back from Spain

163 replies

malloo · 10/08/2020 21:35

In Scotland so schools start back this week. Family with DC in DS's class got back from Spain less than a week ago so should be isolating for 14 days but.... they are sending their kids back this week.

So, should I tell the school? They could be infected and therefore put others at risk. At best it would be inconvenient having to isolate and kids staying home from school again. Or is it none of my business? Not even sure what the school can do about it.

YABU - don't tell, sure they'll be fine
YANBU - tell school, they're being irresponsible

OP posts:
Sugartitties · 10/08/2020 23:17

thing is op, you can tell but what would that actually achieve. there will be children returning to school that will already have covid and other families will also have travelled abroad. you’re at nothing here really.

thepixelrevival · 10/08/2020 23:25

I'd tell the school. The chances are the children will let it slip when asked about summer or their tans but better to tell them I think.

ThinkWittyThoughts · 10/08/2020 23:26

Oh I don't know Sugartitties, perhaps the school could speak to these selfish parents and say child will be welcome back after the full quarantine period.

Or the school could 'bubble' this child away from any vulnerable children, or children living with a vulnerable person. Discretely, so as not to offend these selfish wankers, obviously.

Call the school and share your concerns.

ekidmxcl · 10/08/2020 23:29

I’d tell if it’s mainland Spain.

Canaries or Balearics I’d probably let it go.

Nighttimefreedom · 10/08/2020 23:37

I would definitely tell. Without a doubt.

northprincess · 10/08/2020 23:37

I never interfere with anything normally but yes tell. Who knows who they might be affecting and what the circumstances of those people might be. It's utterly selfish. Most of us have given up our holidays.

Pacif1cDogwood · 10/08/2020 23:45

Well, were just back from the Canaries and are quarantining which will prevent 4 DSs from starting school as planned.

We are quarantining because:

  • it's the right thing to do
  • it's not voluntary
  • everybody and their dog knows me and we no doubt would be grassed up if we did not stick to the rules! Grin

In a situation like this it does not actually matter how high the absolute risk for individuals might be (I do wish the government had decided different rules for the Spanish islands, but alas...), but that there is consistency.

Having said that, I don't think I'd tell on somebody else because

  • absolute risk is quite small depending on WHERE they came from
  • I'm not a grass
  • I am deeply uncomfortable with people policing each other

Btw, we've been home for 3 days, so far nobody has been in contact to check what we've been up to.

FrippEnos · 10/08/2020 23:48

Tell the school.

Railingsohno · 10/08/2020 23:50

Tell the school. As a teacher this seriously pisses me off!!!

PastMyBestBeforeDate · 11/08/2020 00:00

Tell school. I've been out of shielding for 10 days and my dc go back to school in 4 weeks. I'm really pissed off with people who can't follow restrictions for 14 days when my dc did it for 14 weeks.

FizzyGreenWater · 11/08/2020 00:07

Why don't you get a COVID test?

Italiangreyhound · 11/08/2020 00:19

Tell the school anonymously. It is your business because your kids are at the school. It's your kids that could be put at risk. they wanted a holiday, fine, they went to Spain, fine, the rules say whatever they say and they should stick to them.

Don't tell the family you dobbed them in. It's none of their business who dobbed them in, because they are in the wrong. IMHO.

Thanks
Therewillbetroubleahead · 11/08/2020 00:26

@Whatafustercluck

Yanbu.

But is quarantine voluntary? I was on a Facebook group last night as someone was asking about the situation in France and whether they should still go or not. A guy responded that isolation in Spain's case is 'voluntary'. If so, not sure what the school can do.

No, not voluntary. They randomly check up on people and you can be fined,
Pinktruffle · 11/08/2020 00:30

This happened in March in the school that I worked at, a child had been to the worse affected region in Italy and had just done back to school despite our school making an announcement that anyone who went to Italy would need to isolate for two weeks.
Luckily a friends parent 'anonymously' tipped us off and we were able to enforce a 2 weeks isolation from school.

We were very grateful the parent called us, please let the school know. Staffs nd students are being out needlessly at risk.

Emeraldshamrock · 11/08/2020 00:31

My neighbour & family arrived back from Spain Thursday I met her food shopping on Saturday with no mask, her and the family.

user1481840227 · 11/08/2020 00:32

@Starlightstarbright1

I can’t bear how everyone has become the police about other people since Covid.

So no I would leave them to it.

There's a difference between people who became the police about neighbours having people over or so on, or other people doing anything which is extremely unlikely to affect you or your child because you can simply keep away from them and stay safe at home.

......and children who should be self isolating being sent to school where the other students and teachers may be vulnerable and who don't now have the 'luxury' (for want of a better word) of being able to stay at home away from these people.

Italiangreyhound · 11/08/2020 00:38

If you know that someone is doing something that puts anyone, adults or children, in danger, you are not being the police to report it. You are being a concerned neighbour or friend to all the other people at the school who did not go to Spain but may be put at risk by the one family who did.

Spanishmama0114 · 11/08/2020 00:44

We got our letter from school today regarding the DCs starting back on Wednesday and I was surprised there was no mention of this.
I'd def be for telling the school then they can speak to the parents

howfarwevecome · 11/08/2020 00:45

Of course you should tell the school.

theyoniwayisnorthwards · 11/08/2020 01:03

I think they are being selfish but unless they were in a hotspot like Aragon I also don’t think you need to panic if they went to the Costa del sol or the islands.

I live in Spain and think the rationale for the quarantine is poorly thought out, Spain is enormous and while we do have a rise in cases where I am, the severe outbreaks that make up the headline numbers are limited to specific regions, at great distance from the main tourist destinations like the costa de sol and the islands.

Once they’d decided to open the airbridge it would have made much more sense to make the rules by region (as there is huge variation) rather than for the whole country. I agree that what this family are doing is wrong but I also think people like them were unfairly screwed over by a chaotic and opaque decision making. If I felt worried I’d probably approach and ask them to quarantine myself rather than tell on them.

theyoniwayisnorthwards · 11/08/2020 01:06

One more thought, Is testing not available there by now? Is it possible they got tested and plan to return to school if it’s negative?

ineedaholidaynow · 11/08/2020 01:08

2 weeks covers the incubation period, it’s not completely foolproof but better than just a week

user1481840227 · 11/08/2020 02:46

I wonder are they so keen to send the kids back to school because they want to get back to work themselves? therefore putting not only the students and teachers at risk, but all of their colleagues and other people they meet during their working days.

viques · 11/08/2020 05:48

@Sugartitties

i wouldn’t say anything. if they’ve taken precautions, mask etc then i cannot see what difference it would make. If the masks work then they work. My sister has recently tested positive, has worn a mask every time she stepped outside her front door and still got it.
Since your sister has no way of knowing where she picked up the virus she can't say it was despite wearing a mask. She could have touched something, had the virus entering her eye. it's attitudes like yours that are keeping the R rate just high enough for the infection to be circulating.

The point is that the family are choosing to defy government advice and decisions about isolating after their holiday. By doing so they have decided to risk other people becoming infected, class bubbles having to be closed , other people's lives disrupted. Selfish , twattish , anti social behaviour. Sometimes you have to bite the bullet and obey the rules because we live in a society where some rules are there for everyone's benefit. If someone drinks and drives without having an accident for example we don't say that proves drinking and driving is safe and everyone can therefore do it.

Stuckforthefourthtime · 11/08/2020 06:16

@theyoniwayisnorthwards but doesn't matter if they got a negative test, they could still be incubating it. The testing is for people who have had symptoms, and want to know if it's covid or a cold, not for those who have been to places with higher rates (or who have been exposed for some time to someone who has since tested positive).