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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think I've met 'the one' after 3 weeks?

161 replies

NorthernGal9 · 10/08/2020 19:18

I don't know if I necessarily believe in the idea of 'the one' but didn't know how else to phrase it.

Met just over three weeks ago in a pub. Talked all night til 6 in the morning. Seen each other every free minute since. I feel like we both just know.

I've had some utterly horrific experiences in the past and this is so so different. It's like my gut knew as soon as I saw him. He's incredible. I'm just so happy.

Anyone else experienced something this? I didn't even know it was possible to feel this way. It took me a year last time I was with someone to even feel about one-tenth of how I feel now. Eeeeek!

OP posts:

Bitchinkitchen · 10/08/2020 19:20

I have this literally every time i fall in love. Usually didn't last past 6 weeks. Though the last time it happened i married him and so far it's going pretty well.

Bubblesbubblesmybubbles · 10/08/2020 19:21

We had the same, hes still here 4 years later engaged with 2 DC

DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult · 10/08/2020 19:22

They are all in their best behaviour and out to impress in the first few months.

I would be ultra wary of love bombing too.

A year is about right to decide if he's possibly a keeper or not.

Enjoy the butterflies for now though, it's a great feeling.

TheFaerieQueene · 10/08/2020 19:22

Yes. Had this with my DH. Still together many years later and v happy. Sometimes you just know.

motherrunner · 10/08/2020 19:25

Prior to DH all my relationships I ‘fell into’, even married a boyfriend as we’d been together for 6 years and felt like ‘we should’ (& divorced in a year).

Met DH online. Went out for a meal and they had to kick us out of the bar (only drinking soft drinks). Been married 11 years and have 2 children. I knew. It was totally different.

Trust your gut!

Cardboard33 · 10/08/2020 19:27

I met my now husband online (common interests rather than online dating) in summer 2009 and knew I'd end up going out with him within a few weeks of talking. We met in the autumn and have been in a relationship ever since. As I was 21 and still at uni, I didn't think "he's the one" as I wasn't at that stage in life, but if I were older with marriage more on my radar then I might have done.

With my previous boyfriend, who was my first everything, I did not think that and felt we were inevitably going to break up as we were together as teenagers at uni and whilst we were great together we ultimately wanted different things in life. Still lasted 2.5 years though!

PicsInRed · 10/08/2020 19:27

Be careful he isn't lovebombing and mirroring you. If you "have so much in common!" 💕 ... are you quite sure he isn't just saying he likes the same thing and feels the same way about things as you? Are you sure you aren't basically falling in love with yourself?

He pushing to introduce the kids quick smart?

Do you have a secure job, your own house? How's his situation?

Don't get pregnant.

Feralkidsatthecampsite · 10/08/2020 19:28

I met dh on a Saturday night nearly 8 years ago.
Apart from a week in the maternity ward we have never had a night apart.
Married with a dc now..

MaMisled · 10/08/2020 19:28

How lovely. Embrace it. Eighteen years ago, DH and I met. We declared that we were in love after 2 weeks, before we had even kissed, let alone had sex. Both divorced recently, lots of kids between us. We moved fast but it just felt so right. We are very happy and our now grown up DC are really close, despite, looking back, being thrown together. Could we have known it would be ok or were we foolish but lucky?

hedgehoglurker · 10/08/2020 19:29

12 years married and 2 children later. The proposal was after 2 weeks and we married 4 months after meeting. Still blissfully happy. Hope it works out for you.

Frenchfancy · 10/08/2020 19:31

I knew. We got engaged after 14 days, married in 5 months. We have been married for 26years and I still know.

If you have no dc then what have you got to lose? If you have dc then that is a different story.

serenada · 10/08/2020 19:38

My parents got engaged after 3 months. Dad is nursing mum now as she has dementia and everyday he sings to her and talks about the time they met and the places they visited before we all came along. They always looked at each other as those they were seeing the other person for the first time and love had just hit.

56 years married now.

Wrenna · 10/08/2020 19:40

Dh and I knew right away, said I love you at three weeks and have been married 20 years.

CaptainCallisto · 10/08/2020 19:42

DH and I met at work in October. I knew by Christmas, though we didn't even start going out until early Feb (apparently driving everyone at work mad waiting for one of us to ask out the other!). We got engaged in March, married the following August, and will be celebrating our tenth wedding anniversary next week.

Be cautious, but sometimes you just know.

RunningNinja79 · 10/08/2020 19:44

Another quick one here. Got engaged after 3 weeks. Its our 16th wedding anniversary next week. Although we didn't get married for another year. Pretty much moved in together after a week too (I had my own place and he just stayed)

My parents met in a pub. 6 weeks later got engaged another 7 months after that they got married. It was their 45th wedding anniversary yesterday.

It does happen.

81Byerley · 10/08/2020 19:49

Yes, 16 years later still feel the same.

SteelyPanther · 10/08/2020 19:49

Don’t buy a wedding dress just yet !

Beachmummy23 · 10/08/2020 19:50

First date 17 January. knew I was going to marry him by Feb. 10 years married this year.

HowFastIsTooFast · 10/08/2020 19:52

I've had several serious / relatively long relationships in the past, including a marriage.

None of them were so much as a patch on my relationship with DP, he is undoubtedly the one for me. I've known since the weekend I met him and I'm more certain every day.

Zealois · 10/08/2020 19:52

I knew on our first date he was "the one" and he felt the same. I made the first few months really stressful on myself constantly worrying it would end, even though deep down I knew it was different to all the awful relationships I'd had. My advice would be just enjoy the feeling because those first few months getting to know each other are so much fun. 😊

Isbutteracarb · 10/08/2020 19:55

My parents got engaged after 3 weeks and have been happily married for over 35 years

VodselForDinner · 10/08/2020 19:56

I felt a click with my husband instantaneously and we’ve been together almost 20 years now.

However, I’d never let my guard down so early in a relationship. Keep your wits about you. Just think- if it’s this good after 6 weeks, how great is it going to be in 6 months or 6 years? Don’t rush anything and just enjoy your time together until you really figure out who he is.

gwenneh · 10/08/2020 19:56

Yes. Married him, and that was 15 years ago -- I still feel exactly the same.

ChrisPrattsFace · 10/08/2020 19:57

I moved in with DH after 3 weeks of meeting. 10.5 years later were married and have a baby, house and a good life together.
I still feel that way about him now.

Budapestpest · 10/08/2020 19:58

I’d be reasonably wary as you can’t really know someone after that short a time.
However there’s obviously a strong connection so good luck and I hope it works out!

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