The bloody British class system

[notth]

Nc for this.

I live in the UK but am not from here.

My DP and all his friends are very public school and old money and I really get the impression that they judge me and look down on me (not him, obviously).

Is it because I'm from Aus or because I don't fit into things or very clearly not as educated at them?!

I get this impression especially from the girls.

I've read on mn lots that properly posh people aren't snobby .... but it's not true is it?

My DP and all his friends are very public school and old money and I really get the impression that they judge me and look down on me (not him, obviously).

Can you give some examples?

Its 2020. Class doesn't exist, especially if you're an ethnic minority

Some of the most class obsessed snobs I've ever met are Indian/Asian business people. They openly admit it too.

@WorraLiberty

Assuming I won't have heard of certain things - places / brands / people. If they are talking about school, on more than one occasion there has been a pause, look to me and 'boarding school'.

It's just an impression I get, and not a subtle one.

I expect your being Australian may not be the cause, possibly just cliquey.

Paul Keating may have behaved unacceptably in putting his arm around the Queen to guide her whilst on a visit, but only he is blamed.

To be fair, the examples given could be because you are foreign and they imagine you aren't aware of some British names. I had never heard of Take That until I came here.

@boreda11 maybe I was being kind to say it's because of where I'm from - I'm pretty sure it's because my family don't have money and it's obvious.

Class is alive and well in U.K., but the most snooty are the parvenus🤔

Assuming I won't have heard of certain things - places / brands / people. If they are talking about school, on more than one occasion there has been a pause, look to me and 'boarding school'.

Are you sure the assumptions aren't simply because you're Australian?

I'm not sure what the problem is with them explaining they're talking about boarding school though?

But you would be the same if you were with a group of Australians. I guarantee it.

@lockitdown true.

Another example is for my 30th my DP bought me Cartier watch which to me is the best thing ever and one of the girls was like 'oh wow, I think I had one of those when I was 16'.

An aristocratic woman I knew had no money.. she said it isn’t about money but values and beliefs- Her family lost “ The Family Seat” in the early 1960’s - Crippling Death Duties!

I've found rich old money very up themselves. Think "Oh, I don't talk to the people who serve me" kind of attitude (yes, that was said to me once when I said good morning to someone in the posh town I worked in).

How old are you @notth ?

She may have meant a watch...who wears a watch these days?

You are different and they don't know what to make of you.

You are from forrin parts, so you will either be considered a novelty or with suspicion.
You won't have their mannerisms.

You are Aussie so are just like Kathy Lette and Germaine Greer but not Kylie.

It isn't the class system, it's a tribe thing.

Start buying clothes from the right shops and adopting their speech.

@lockitdown 31 and she meant and said the exact watch I was wearing.

My DP and all his friends are very public school and old money and I really get the impression that they judge me and look down on me (not him, obviously).

That's not my experience. My DH and a lot of his friends are very public school and old money, whereas I went to the shittiest comp in town.

I have never felt judged or looked down on by them.

I did occasionally have to educate some of them in what life is like for people who don't have their advantages - but I've also had to do that with friends who weren't from public school.

I didn't notice them all acting the same, dressing the same, or anything like that either.

I've known them all about 25 years now and they've always been there for me, even though I've lived a long way away from them for the last 13 years.

@lockitdown but maybe it was because wearing watches aren't 'in' - I didn't know that!

Assuming I won't have heard of certain things - places / brands / people. If they are talking about school, on more than one occasion there has been a pause, look to me and 'boarding school

OP. I know exactly how this was made, I can imagine I was there myself.

Ignore them :)

[quote notth]@lockitdown true.

Another example is for my 30th my DP bought me Cartier watch which to me is the best thing ever and one of the girls was like 'oh wow, I think I had one of those when I was 16'.

[/quote]
Again, unless that was a lie, what on earth is the problem.

Cartier watches are timeless (pardon the pun!) classics, so why wouldn't she mention that?

The more you're posting, the more I think this is about what you feel about you, not what they feel about you.

I think if you are foreign you sit somewhat outside the British class system as you can't easily be placed by accent or school. I wouldn't have a clue where the good private schools are.

As for old money not being snobs, well they certainly like to marry other people with money, rather than marrying someone poor and spreading it around a bit.

They sound like a bit of a twatty clique tbh. We had one of those at university on my course. One of them told me that he really liked me, but I couldn't be his girlfriend because I wasn't 'one of us'.

@WorraLiberty it's really not, I feel fine with who I am.

I might not be conveying tone but I know how I'm treated.

My dad used to have a newsagents shop in a very upper class village in the 70s and 80s.
Most people had their newspapers and magazines delivered, at that time.
Invariably, during times of transport disruption or bad weather, the newspapers/magazines would arrive too late to be delivered by the paperboys/girls.
It was very interesting to note that Lord ‘such and such’ would voluntarily pick up various piles of newspapers and offer to deliver them. Similarly the heiress to a vast fortune , who also lived in the village would do the same.
Many folk would phone up if their delivery was late . The upper class would say things like ‘ oh don’t worry, not a problem.’
The middle classes would phone and complain about shoddy service and threaten to cancel their orders.
Once I got to an age, I worked in dad’s shop during high days and holidays. I quickly learned who the snobs were, and they weren’t the upper classes.

'oh wow, I think I had one of those when I was 16'.
the bitch.

Ignore them - don't become yet another blonde stepford wife with a landrover and a labrador just to fit into their tiny braying circle.