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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Friend taking p*** or am I being over sensitive?

596 replies

democrazy · 04/08/2020 20:28

We own some land across the road from our house, invested in a small yurt and have a semi permanent type summer glamping set up, fire pit, pizza oven etc. Friend text me to ask if she can use the site to celebrate her birthday (it's a big one) with a few close friends (about 10-15), I mistook the message as inviting DH and I as well, which she replied saying she was embarrassed but really she just wanted her closest friends and I wouldn't be invited. This is fine as I wouldn't have considered myself in that circle - I'd say we're friends but not super close, but we are good friends with a number of the people who would be going. But I thought it a bit cheeky that she basically wants to use our extended garden to have a small party but not invite us. We've used the space for other friends and family celebrations, but we've always been part of them. I've said yes becuase I'd feel mean if
didn't, but equally feeling a little put out, though not sure if it's my embarassment at assuming I was invited or my feeling put out that they want to use the space without inviting us. P.s. I know this is a very first world issue and really not of great importance, just sense checking myself!

OP posts:
Therunecaster · 04/08/2020 21:40

Good for you. What a CF she is!

Collision · 04/08/2020 21:41

Well done OP.

The cheekiness and bare faced things people do on Mumsnet shocks me every day.

roxfox · 04/08/2020 21:41

Wow!!! Well done op. The woman is a total user

BadDucks · 04/08/2020 21:42

Ooh that's equivalent of the thumbs up emoji. Might as well be the middle finger. I think among mutual friends she will come out of this looking pretty bad.

MrsSpookyM · 04/08/2020 21:43

OP - keep an eye on your property on the day of the party.

The ultimate CF move for her would be to turn up on the day and have the party against your wishes hoping you won't intervene. Never forget what Mexican house thief has taught us.

DorisDances · 04/08/2020 21:43

That's the right outcome. Well done OP Star

caramelbun · 04/08/2020 21:43

Well done op. Your friend should be embarrassed for life about asking you this. But she’s gotten to 40 without realising you can’t hold a party in your friends garden and exclude them. So maybe not.

Somethingkindaoooo · 04/08/2020 21:45

Placemarking too...
Well done OP

MistyMinge2 · 04/08/2020 21:45

I'd have assumed I was invited too. I can't believe she had the cheek to ask and then say she didn't want you there. Extremely rude.

itsgettingweird · 04/08/2020 21:45

How long before she extends you the invite and tries again?!

Good response and good outcome.

steppemum · 04/08/2020 21:48

@Freixene

Massive CF Reply with ‘No problem, thanks for clarifying. I’m afraid in that case, it’s £300 to hire, as we can only lend our garden to to close friends and family. The cost will be needed for clean up and insurance costs as we can’t be there to monitor guests we don’t know, or see any damage caused’
this.

she is really taking the piss.
in these circumstances, if you want to use someones garden, of course you include them in the invitation!

LassoOfTruth · 04/08/2020 21:48

Wow. What a grade-A CF!!!
YADNBU. I look forward to seeing this come up on future 'tales of CFers' type threads - as hopefully you will get revenge by charging her and you'll be able to laugh about it in future. You deserve much better 'friends' than this horrible person!

Delphinium20 · 04/08/2020 21:49

OP - nicely done!!!

Jellybeansincognito · 04/08/2020 21:50

Wow what a CF.
Good on you op!

7yo7yo · 04/08/2020 21:50

Yaaayyy an op who doesn’t tolerate shit! Well done op!

chinam · 04/08/2020 21:50

Well done Op.

Splitsunrise · 04/08/2020 21:54

Well done OP!! What a cow. Though disappointing for the rest of us who were hoping for a bit more drama in her reply Grin

conduitoffortune · 04/08/2020 21:55

Ugh, I want to throw something at her and I don't even know her. Is she always like this?

PyongyangKipperbang · 04/08/2020 21:55

Still, nice to know thats another Xmas card you wont have to buy.

Strike that one off the "friends" list.

Prig · 04/08/2020 21:57

So glad you've rescinded the offer. What a cheek. Such bad manners.... such arrogance! Hope you remain cold towards this user. (But then I'm just an all or nothing kind of person.. and like it that way!).

Didkdt · 04/08/2020 21:59

The thing is she didn't care about your feelings why should you care about hers.

NorthernBirdAtHeart · 04/08/2020 22:01

What a CF!
Well done OP 👏

MadeForThis · 04/08/2020 22:02

Well done

RuggerHug · 04/08/2020 22:03

Glad you stood up to her!!

KitKat1985 · 04/08/2020 22:03

Good for you OP. That was massively fucking cheeky of her.