AIBU to think it’s not me who’s ‘odd’

[NotOdd]

Apparently (according to bf) I’m odd, out of touch and not like “most people” because I think Sunday roast lunch as a regular standard default family event is normal and that about now is the time to start firming up Christmas plans in terms of guests etc.

Bf says he knows no one who regularly has a Sunday roast lunch or anyone who thinks about Christmas “this early”. He thinks this is because I come from a “backward” part of the country 🙄

I am genuinely confused because literally everyone I know (bf and his family aside) would have a roast Sunday lunch (not set in stone, other things may happen instead ie days out, bbq in the summer etc) and everyone I know either has, or nearly has, their Christmas plans settled. When I say ‘everyone’ I mean my whole family, my EXH whole family (going by knowing them for 20 years) and all my friends.

AIBU for thinking it’s not me who’s the ‘odd’ one?

I also don't get why a roast is such a faff - once it's in the oven it needs no attention!

We don’t have a regular Sunday roast, I find it a bit odd to decide your menu dependent on the day of the week. We eat what we fancy when we fancy based also on what’s in the fridge.

And no we aren’t firming Up Xmas now either, it’s far too early. Will do that in a couple of months.

I’m also with your boyfriend but think his phrasing is odd. But no I don’t think your behaviour is the norm.

I never cook a roast dinner. I never cook a Xmas dinner either..we go out.
I think about Xmas in November, but only buy for 4 people. I don't get the huge Xmas is the best time of the year...is the rest of your year so dull? Why live for the 25th December?

We don’t have a roast of a Sunday and no we don’t make any plans re. Christmas until November/December. However the fact you do think like this would make me assume you come fr a large, sociable family and I’d think it was lovely.

I love a Sunday roast and cook one most weeks. However we don't eat it until about 5 pm or so. My family love it, but if the weather is great we may have a bbq instead. It's not set in stone and if we're out and about we don't mind missing it.
Thoughts of Christmas however... Way too early!

Why does everyone think roasts are hard work? You just chop a few carrots and broccoli to boil, peel a few potatoes.

All the meat and potatoes get shoved in the oven together and veg goes on 20 minutes before serving then instant gravy and frozen Yorkshires. It takes about ten minutes of prep and ten minutes to dish up, how is this hard?

We have ours in the evening so no need to 'waste' a day. It takes me way longer to cook a lasagne or pie etc.

I don't have the inclination or time to spend my Sundays slaving over a roast. I don't think many people bother any more.

Wrt to Christmas plans, I probably think about Christmas from October - although if I see a perfect present, I'll buy it at any time in the year & put it aside. We're childfree so less to plan and arrange. Would probably do it all from September if DC come along. My dp and I have actually mentioned this Christmas in passing already due to things happening in our families and our respective family set ups. For various reasons connected to this - plus still being quite new- we've both stated we'd like to go "home". It just sort of happened and was agreed upon.

Nothing weird about having a roast most sundays.
A lot of people grew up with Sunday roast. And a lot of people still have them.
As to starting to sort Christmas now again it depends on the family. If you have a large family with a lot of competition of who gets who then it makes sense to organise early so nothing wrong in issuing your invitations now even if by most standards it is still early.
But in any event your boyfriend is a knob for referring to any area as backwards so I wouldn’t be cooking him any Sunday roast or setting a place for him at my table come Christmas.

I used to have them growing up in the 90s and they were fine. My mum would change it to roast chicken and salad in summer and back to roast veg in winter. They are not the most exciting of meals. Would much prefer a Thai curry or a risotto. I think my fiance and I have them once in a blue moon when we take a notion for Yorkshire puddings. However we would never have it for lunch it would just be normal dinner time.

I also don't get why a roast is such a faff - once it's in the oven it needs no attention!

I disagree. Don’t you baste your meat? I find that a roast dinner comes with the expectation of lots of little extras, several types of vegetables, boiled or mashed potatoes plus roast potatoes, Yorkshire puddings, stuffing or apple sauce or mint jelly, gravy, a dessert etc etc. Then the meat has to be carved. It’s important that everything is served hot and serving up a roast dinner is a real pain if you don’t have the space to serve “family” style. It’s not the simplest of meals to prepare and if you have guests there’s a lot of expectation. A chicken, some boiled potatoes, peas, gravy and a yogurt for dessert isn’t going to cut it.

I have a roast every Sunday!! I love it!
And yes I'm planning Christmas right now.

It’s not what most people do, but just want to say that it doesn’t make you odd or backward. Every family has family traditions of their own and you should be proud of them.

As for the Sunday lunch, sorry but to me people who always have a ‘roast’ on Sunday, to me, have always been lower-class/‘chavvy’ (sorry to use that term)

You raging snob. What a shitty attitude.

@HuaShan

I also don't get why a roast is such a faff - once it's in the oven it needs no attention!

Agreed, they really aren’t difficult

I'm currently at the stage of planning Christmas gifts and I want to start making some decorations but tbh I'm still quite young and go to parents for Christmas day so no planning needed there.

Also while I don't have aa Sunday roast every week I completely understand that it's basically a British tradion in many households, I have very fond memories of roast dinners round my nans and it is something I would want to carry on with my future family.

I don't think either of you are odd though and your bf sounds a lil stuck up.

My family are in Ireland, so I already know I'm having Christmas Day with the in laws and going to my family on Boxing Day. Christmas stuff is usually starting to pop up in the shops by now (I know this as my birthday is around now and there's almost always Christmas stuff in the supermarket on my birthday!)

Shelves in Tesco are stripped bare of roasting meats and pre made gravy and Yorkshire puddings by 11am on a Sunday and getting a pub lunch booking on a Sunday is nigh on impossible round here so I'd say Sunday roasts are still very popular.

Your boyfriend sounds rude and patronising towards you

We had Sunday roast lunch at ours last week. Invited Mil, we probably do it 4 times a year and Mil does it a few times too.

Sunday lunch is a fixture here - either at my parents’ house or mine. I haven’t thought about Christmas at all, but we do the same thing every year - C. Day with my parents from lunchtime and ILs on B Day - so it doesn’t need thought!

Can’t remember the last time we had a Sunday roast and I will start planning Christmas in November, but only because both dc have xmas birthdays.

@NC10101

As for the Sunday lunch, sorry but to me people who always have a ‘roast’ on Sunday, to me, have always been lower-class/‘chavvy’ (sorry to use that term)*
*

Hahahahaha wtf!! I think your the oddest one on here judging people on when they have a roast. Looks like I'm a lower class chav!!

I have my roast every Sunday. Usually beef , pop it in the slow cooker and do the veg when I get back from my day out or whatever, I always have it on an evening. But if that makes me lower class then ok!

How on earth can you plan Christmas now? Restrictions about meeting up between different households are highly likely to be still in place and possibly stricter if we get a winter peak in cases and the NHS struggles to cope with it.

Only a little unreasonable. I’d have worked out roughly who was going where for Christmas by now usually, but we’re both from large families so it’s always a bit of a nightmare to get organised. And this year - is there any point in planning?! Anything could happen! I don’t know anyone who regularly has a Sunday lunch though. That would be a once or twice a year thing for special occasions - Easter definitely, Mother’s Day maybe.

It's a rare event for me to do a traditional Sunday dinner; my mum and dad always do, they cannot possibly deviate from their 40+ year meal routine! We're not a big meat eating house anyway- I don't eat any meat or fish, DH eats meat very occasionally, the older dc eat it but the youngest isn't keen- so there's not much point in a meal that centres around a hunk of flesh, and a load of roast potatoes and vegetables is lovely but not exactly something I feel a need to do on a weekly basis.

As for Xmas, I have thought about it, in the sense of panicking that I can't afford it and wondering whether there will be a vaccine by then as god knows that's the only way my mother will ever leave her house again.

No Christmas plans. I do tend to cook a slightly more special meal on Sunday evenings because Sundays are the only day when nobody is at work or school, and next Sunday it will be lavender and honey roast lamb, but it might also be a whole big fish, or a curry or a vegetarian tart or something else nice. Generally, Sunday and Wednesday are my days for stealing ideas from restaurant menus and cooking what I want rather than what the children are likely to eat without complaint.

@NameChange84

I also don't get why a roast is such a faff - once it's in the oven it needs no attention!

I disagree. Don’t you baste your meat? I find that a roast dinner comes with the expectation of lots of little extras, several types of vegetables, boiled or mashed potatoes plus roast potatoes, Yorkshire puddings, stuffing or apple sauce or mint jelly, gravy, a dessert etc etc. Then the meat has to be carved. It’s important that everything is served hot and serving up a roast dinner is a real pain if you don’t have the space to serve “family” style. It’s not the simplest of meals to prepare and if you have guests there’s a lot of expectation. A chicken, some boiled potatoes, peas, gravy and a yogurt for dessert isn’t going to cut it.

My goodness, no wonder people find it hard if that is what you are doing.

I do not baste my meat, it sits in the oven until done and is perfectly delicious. I do two types of veg and roast potatoes and that is it. Yorkshires take 20 minutes in the oven so can be done at the same time as veg. We never have dessert after as it is a big meal.

Jelly sits in a pot on the table and is just apple jelly made last year and I do not bother doing mint sauce etc, no need whatsoever.

I am, however, doing it for the three of us so do not have to plate up for lots of people.