AIBU to think it’s not me who’s ‘odd’

[NotOdd]

Apparently (according to bf) I’m odd, out of touch and not like “most people” because I think Sunday roast lunch as a regular standard default family event is normal and that about now is the time to start firming up Christmas plans in terms of guests etc.

Bf says he knows no one who regularly has a Sunday roast lunch or anyone who thinks about Christmas “this early”. He thinks this is because I come from a “backward” part of the country 🙄

I am genuinely confused because literally everyone I know (bf and his family aside) would have a roast Sunday lunch (not set in stone, other things may happen instead ie days out, bbq in the summer etc) and everyone I know either has, or nearly has, their Christmas plans settled. When I say ‘everyone’ I mean my whole family, my EXH whole family (going by knowing them for 20 years) and all my friends.

AIBU for thinking it’s not me who’s the ‘odd’ one?

SJK34 that's sad to read ! I don't blame you for not having them back.
The Christmas threads are always full of horrible guest stories etc. People are so ungrateful aren't they?
I normally start planning around mid November time or later but we don't make a big thing of Christmas or have anyone over so I'm lucky! Best way.

We rarely have a Sunday roast and no, we haven't started arranging Christmas yet! Sorry

I think anyone who has already organised Christmas which involves a number of households are very premature considering what has happened in the North of England

@ineedaholidaynow

I think anyone who has already organised Christmas which involves a number of households are very premature considering what has happened in the North of England

People can change plans . Better to make plans with the assumption that they could change than just sit around in limbo not planning anything for the foreseeable.

@Drivingdownthe101 I’m thinking of people who have already spent money on things that might not be refundable or may take ages to get a refund.

He is backward , Sunday lunch is just a chance to get family friends around for a laid back get together with out rushing , have you not told him that his family are a bit or odd for never doing it , or maybe no one likes them and would rather go hungry than have their company for an hour

*ineedaholidaynow

@Drivingdownthe101 I’m thinking of people who have already spent money on things that might not be refundable or may take ages to get a refund.*

We deliberately booked on Amex as they are fab at returning money quickly and without a fuss.

Sunday roast dinners definately yes, far too early to be thinking of Christmas.....
Does your boyfriend come from an unfriendly / disconnected family? Sunday roast dinners are a good family event bringing people together , all sitting around a table chatting! 😊

We started having regular Sunday roasts as a way to differentiate the days during lockdown - anything to give the week structure - and now we love it! I like to plan Christmas early but that’s because I bloody love Christmas and I like to look forward to it all year ... but I have always assumed I am the odd one there and no one else plans next Christmas in January...

@Aroundtheroaringcandle

We started having regular Sunday roasts as a way to differentiate the days during lockdown - anything to give the week structure - and now we love it! I like to plan Christmas early but that’s because I bloody love Christmas and I like to look forward to it all year ... but I have always assumed I am the odd one there and no one else plans next Christmas in January...

You need to venture onto the Christmas board. Some of us are there all year! 🎅🏻🎄😁

Sunday Roast all year round, whatever the weather. Usually something using left over meat on Monday (although more likely special fried rice than cottage pie these days!)

With you on Sunday lunch. And it really isn't such a chore, especially if everyone mucks in.

Christmas-not a chance of any plans before early November. Those who plan that far ahead, to me, seem anxious to get the invitations out early so someone else doesn't swipe their guests first.
Or not very busy.

I think it’s quite odd to plan an entire day of the weekend, every weekend, around cooking your lunch, yes

It's the highlight of my DH's week. Red wine in hand, he does the whole thing singlehandedly. But then, we're rural...

@ineedaholidaynow - I've always found it easier to book things in diaries early then cancel, rather than to wait until the last minute if it involves various people and expect them to be free at the same time.

Bit like I always put a bigger turkey than I really need in my 'holding' Ocado order in October, as the smaller ones are usually easier to get at the last minute if you cancel the big one reserved. Have learned from previous years, it's much easier to go smaller from big plans than to scale up to big plans from small/nothing.

However, this year it'll be just me, DH and the 2 DCs on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day - I really don't want that to change ! unless I convince DH we should try skiing over Christmas week and opt out completely

When you say Sunday lunch is a family event, does that mean you spend every Sunday with your family? Is your bf required to go along with that or forego seeing you?

i think it’s quite odd to plan an entire day of the weekend, every weekend, around cooking your lunch, yes

I think it's quite odd to assume that having a simple roast meal means having to plan your day around it, whether or not on a weekly basis, assuming you are going to eat something at some point in the day anyway. We often have a roast meal early or late on Sunday night if we have been out, or on Monday eve if we are running late. We do plan a bit more sometimes if we invite friends to join us (in normal pre-Covid times) , but that usually is a pretty spontaneous decision too. We buy the ingreds and then just cook them when it suits.

We have sunday dinner in our house every Sunday. It doesn't take that long to cook, but I don't always roast the potatoes, and chuck chicken in the oven instead of a joint of beef, so it doesn't take as long. I usually cook up some mixed veg and make yorkie puds in a yorkie pud tray, and use gravy granules instead of making 'real' gravy, but it all works well and everyone enjoys it. I'd agree that some weeks you might want to be spontaneous, and do things a bit differently, nothing has to be set in stone, but I think he is being a bit weird in how rude he has been about it. Also saying that you come from a 'backward' part of the country is a fairly horrible thing to say to anyone, let alone his own partner. Does he put you down in other ways too?

He thinks this is because I come from a “backward” part of the country
LTB that is an utterly shit attitude

I am with the bf unless you live in NI where Sunday lunch is still a thing Yabu as regards Christmas you posted in JULY never mind what Covid may do to plans this year it's too early any year

I'm in the middle.
Sunday roast. I like to do but prefer to go to inlaws.. If not a Sunday we have a different day when more time. Ours was yesterday.

Xmas.. I buy through the year. In fact I did a huge online order earlier.
Then when I have a few gifts I wrap. Write down and put in loft.

For Xmas day plans. I generally start thinking about it now. But never confirm until Dec. I know this Yr well be at home. But depends on how my mood takes me as to who I invite.. ( often family fall outs between others and I hate drama)

It's the highlight of my DH's week. Red wine in hand, he does the whole thing singlehandedly. But then, we're rural...

Sounds wonderful.

We're in Wales (so potentially "backwards" ) and roasts are completely normal. Not religiously every Sunday necessarily for my generation, but I'd guarantee on any given Sunday I know multiple people cooking one or eating one in the pub. And it's perfectly normal to join a roast, usually a parents if passing on a Sunday.

We're vegetarian and I cover everything in mint sauce, so probably considered backwards amongst die hard roast dinner fans

i do a sunday roast for the family most weeeks, its been a bit hit and miss with covid obviously and now we're decorating so no access to the kitchen this week, but i do regularly cook family meals and invite them round under normal circumstances, sometimes even a couple times week

We regularly have a roast on a Sunday! More in winter than summer. But even in summer I might do a roast chicken but with rice and salad.
I too think about Christmas from around now. I need to budget and start looking out for present ideas. If your ‘odd’ then so am I ...!

I used to live in London so roasts weren't so popular. Once I moved to the midlands I then realised roasts were alive and well alongside carveries being v popular. Personally not into it whatsoever. Too traditional for me.