AIBU to think it’s not me who’s ‘odd’

[NotOdd]

Apparently (according to bf) I’m odd, out of touch and not like “most people” because I think Sunday roast lunch as a regular standard default family event is normal and that about now is the time to start firming up Christmas plans in terms of guests etc.

Bf says he knows no one who regularly has a Sunday roast lunch or anyone who thinks about Christmas “this early”. He thinks this is because I come from a “backward” part of the country 🙄

I am genuinely confused because literally everyone I know (bf and his family aside) would have a roast Sunday lunch (not set in stone, other things may happen instead ie days out, bbq in the summer etc) and everyone I know either has, or nearly has, their Christmas plans settled. When I say ‘everyone’ I mean my whole family, my EXH whole family (going by knowing them for 20 years) and all my friends.

AIBU for thinking it’s not me who’s the ‘odd’ one?

We have a Sunday roast most Sunday’s, I’ve ordered my first Xmas presents today and am starting to organise where we will be on Xmas day! You are totally not odd!

I'd love a roast every Sunday but it's me who would have to cook it-single mum and I just cannot be bothered. I already know Christmas plans, very small family, but when ex was around xmas plans were not usually discussed until about October time I think. You're not odd though. Your bff sounds rude.

We have a sunday roast most sundays, pre covid we would have guests. Now its summer and because of covid I pick the coolest, wettest day of the week to do a roast. Which according to our forecast is tomorrow so we are having beef.

I dont think either of you are odd just different ends of a spectrum. I can only sort out one thing at once, my oldest's birthday is end of august, then the kids go back to school, by mid sept I'm ready to start my christmas planning.

Sunday roasts are the best dinner of the week haha! I love to have a roast on a Sunday it’s something my family have always done
Christmas I’m also very organised I’ll have the kids presents and all the families sorted and finished by the end of September as for me going to the shops after is a no go can’t cope with the madness, we’ve also organised whose doing what and going where this Christmas already but I like to be organised plus I have my nan coming for Christmas this year and we live 300 miles away so kinda need to be prepared

Sunday roasts happen in some form most weekends here - YANBU

Christmas planning starts at October half term. YABU unless there's lots of people from all 4 corners of the globe attending and things like planes and hotels need booking

I do love a roast but I probably have one three times a year - definitely not every Sunday. I’m more bothered about Christmas chat in July, though! I don’t buy gifts until at least November and we’ll decide what to have for Christmas dinner (we have a different meat every year) about two weeks before the day

I love my Sunday lunch!! We go to my Mam’s usually for it, but over lockdown, we took turns making takeout for the other and will likely carry on this way hit eating with each other (her and hubby, me my hubby and our 3 kids). It’s not a case of spending all day on it, it really doesn’t take long but it’s my favourite meal of the week.
Our Christmas has been the same set up forever, so yes we know our plans already

*but eating together

We go out for Sunday lunch fairly often in winter (if there’s nothing better to do). Almost never cook it at home, far too much faff.
Don’t think about Christmas until I have to and is largely dictated by what we’re doing (ie. if we’re going away, that has to be booked in advance).

I'm not fussed about Sunday roasts but it's not odd to have them regularly.

If you have a complex family, it's reasonable to get a measure of people's intentions early on. Christmas Dinner in restaurants can often be booked up by October, especially for larger groups.
Visiting in the same town, setting times and who's bringing what is a tad premature at this point though

If you give handmade Christmas presents you’ll know the phrase “Christmas in July”. It’s when all the Christmas crafting materials come on sale, so some people obviously do start planning around now.

But a roast every Sunday? Even in Summer? Not for me.

We love a Sunday roast dinner! It's fairly standard here. Christmas isn't even thought about until December

Come august I start feeling uneasy as I know my mother will be wanting us to travel to hers snd want to plan this, invite others etc. Every year I evade questions and feel bad as I just want to stay home and have a quiet 4 some - not the formality and many cousins event she loved and slaves for . Our best one was when j was hugely pregnant and bought everything in packets from m&s - it was lush! So low key..

Sunday dinner odd time everyone enjoys it but I do find it a lot of work. With small children now i would prefer to go to pub and let them cook.

I don't think either of you are odd. Neither way is right or wrong. Depends on your background and what your bought up with.

I was bought up with the Sunday roast. So we're my adult youngsters. Over the years its changed to as and when, like most people I know. I cant pinpoint when it happened. It just did

As for Christmas I think it depends on circumstances. I shop all round for Christmas starting in January with the sales for Christmas cards, paper etc. I also buy the usual stocking filler's during the year. Then the main presents around Sept/Oct.

I have November/December off to enjoy the various events. Cards are written in October ready to go on Dec 1st.

I have a large family and grandchildren so its a routine I have built over 35 years as that was when my eldest was born

Neither of you are odd. Just different lifestyles. It doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things. Nothing to do with where you live either.

YANBU:
I grew up & loved Sunday roast but I think society has changed and people do more at weekends and it is not set in stone so to speak!

YABU:
It is miles off for Christmas plans to be settled... No-one I know, friends, family decide this early... A couple of months before at the earliest to begin to sort!

I think you may have control issues that need some work!

Personally I hate the idea of the default position being that you’ll either host family or visit family every single Sunday without fail for lunch/dinner. However I do have friends that do it.

@Bumble84 I must admit I would find that stifling, don't people do other things on a Sunday, or just want to chill at home?

Also the people who say they go to their Mum's, for example, every Sunday and their siblings do too, what about the in-laws, don't they get a look in too?

Can't remember the last time we had a Sunday lunch. We are always too busy to make roasts. And Christmas planning surely only starts in December! It's July!!!!

We almost always have a Sunday roast. It’s wonderful and definitely not dying out any time soon at ours. All my brothers and sisters do the same. That’s not odd at all, but Christmas..?!?!?!

Bizarre.
Don't have a meal at all on Sundays as I work.
Just a few snacks. It's my busiest working day.
and Christmas!?!! Get away!

I take turns with my daughter making Sunday lunch. During the summer we don't usually have a roast, but autumn and winter I always make a roast. We don't eat until 6 ish though which allows free time to get out for a few hours. The meat goes in the oven on a timer, and I prepare the veg before I go out.
I look forward to our grown children, and our grand children getting together for Sunday lunch. It's something we've always done.

Christmas is the same. We went to our daughters for dinner last year, so this year it'll be my turn to host.

I always (90 %) of the time do a Sunday roast. Sometimes it's basic and I use a couple of convenience foods, other times I go all out with all the trimmings. I was brought up with both grandparents always doing Sunday roast and my mum. For me, it takes the bother out of deciding what to have that day and I make sure everyone sits to the table for it. I thought everyone did it! Until my dp said he really likes it that I still 'make the effort' to do that for the family. Sometimes he says 'you don't have to bother' but for me it's no more bother than cooking any other meal, and I enjoy it .

I've 'thought' about Christmas but haven't done anything yet. Got 2 dcs birthdays in August so that's always expensive. Every year though I say I should start earlier and buy stuff throughout the year to spread the cost and the stress. I've got a really big family and 3 dcs, so even keeping things to a minimum, it still takes up a lot of time and money. If I only had a couple of people to buy for, I wouldn't be thinking about it now. Depends on your family dynamic I suppose.

I know a lot of people who have a roast every Sunday. If you enjoy it then go for it. We don't as I get bored of it.
Also your bf isn't coming across very well. Is he always this nasty?