AIBU to think it’s not me who’s ‘odd’

[NotOdd]

Apparently (according to bf) I’m odd, out of touch and not like “most people” because I think Sunday roast lunch as a regular standard default family event is normal and that about now is the time to start firming up Christmas plans in terms of guests etc.

Bf says he knows no one who regularly has a Sunday roast lunch or anyone who thinks about Christmas “this early”. He thinks this is because I come from a “backward” part of the country 🙄

I am genuinely confused because literally everyone I know (bf and his family aside) would have a roast Sunday lunch (not set in stone, other things may happen instead ie days out, bbq in the summer etc) and everyone I know either has, or nearly has, their Christmas plans settled. When I say ‘everyone’ I mean my whole family, my EXH whole family (going by knowing them for 20 years) and all my friends.

AIBU for thinking it’s not me who’s the ‘odd’ one?

We have a roast maybe once a month. As for Christmas, YABU, I don’t think anyone is thinking that far ahead at the moment.

We have a roast on Sunday every few weeks. Usually if we have had a busy Saturday so are having a Sunday relaxing at home. DH does the roast easily, unlike me who is more of a one pot cook!

We decided to go away for Christmas this year with my DM, step dad, and Dsis so have booked a house for us - which we’ve not done before. Once the house was booked (to make sure we got availability) haven’t given it another thought

I cook a roast almost every Sunday. We always had one as a child and I enjoy it. I hadn't really thought about Christmas but my sister in law asked what our plans were the other day. She wants to spend it with her family so I think was just checking that we would see MIL and she wouldn't be alone. We'll sleep here at home so the kids can wake up here and have presents then we'll go to inlaws after breakfast.

We will often have a Sunday roast. And normally we would be discussing what day to hold the extended family Christmas day. Because several of us do shift work it takes a bit of organising to all get the same day off.

You'd be considered normal in my family! We are variously based in London, Kent, East Anglia, East Mids and the North East.

Your bf would be considered rude in my family for referring to areas/customs as backwards!

Growing up in the 80s and 90s most Sundays involved a roast at home or at one or the other of my grandparents' homes! My PILs still cook one every Sunday even though they're on their own now. We havw one a handful of times a year and usually at dinnertime rather than lunch as it interferes less with the day.

I don't think roasts are a huge faff but they have to be nice - I can't bear a bland, boring roast.

We do tend to plan Christmas in advance which I think is a bit more normal if you have lots of relatives to consider. DH is one of four and my PILs live at the other end of the country and they always want to start planning who is going to stay with them and when as they like to host Christmas. I don't like being forced into making a decision about it early though!

Skimmed the thread - I think that timing of Christmas plans is largely dependent on whether your family is spread out regionally. We have no family within a 2 hour radius and they are all in different places so we start thinking about the plans in June (sometimes this is very minor).

As for Sunday roast, I can't remember the last time we had one but then I didn't grow up here! DH did grow up here (in Yorkshire, in fact!) but isn't fussed. So I guess that one varies - unusual to have one every Sunday, but not insanely so.

We kind of a have Christmas plans permanently sorted cause it is pretty much the same every year. However it is not discussed until mid December.

I'm not British and most people i know in Britain are not British so weekly Sunday roast is not a thing. However the few Brits I do know has Sunday roast in a pub once a month.

When I first got together with now DH he didn’t really like roasts but would eat one if I cooked one (Sunday roasts were traditional when we were children). But over the years he has completely changed and we tend to have one most Sundays now unless the weather is hot, and he is the one who always cooks them. We always have them in the evening though so we have time to do things in the day.

Christmas would never be planned this early but we are a small family. However, I have thought about it as for the last 2 years we have had DM and MIL with us, as both of them are on their own now due to bereavement. DM lives locally but
MIL lives the other side of the country. DM currently shielding. So I am not sure how we can have them both in the same house, as although Boris says everything will be fine by Christmas I’m sure it won’t. But I don’t like the idea of either of them being alone. BIL may be able to have MIL but he sometimes has to work over Christmas.

How are people making plans so early on for large family Christmas gatherings when there is a possibility that those sort of gatherings won’t be allowed still?

We don't do regular Sunday roast - probably once every 6 weeks but I know people who do.

We always do the same at Christmas- in laws come to ours - so no need to plan that. I think its probably slightly to early to organise xmas as I start in September usually so I suppose its only a month or so early.

Sunday roast- yes.
Christmas- no. Christmas is for December. I do start buying presents in November, though.

We have Sunday roasts most weeks. Most of my friends and family do too (other than when something else is going on like a BBQ).

Christmas- we generally have it planned early. Usually not long after we make loose arrangements for the following year and then confirm and finalise plans around September/October.

Sunday roast - no. It’s very rare for us to have a roast. My PIL do have one most weeks. I never had them growing up or as an adult. Roasts are rare, we are In Scotland though and I think it’s more of an English thing. We always had a proper Sunday dinner but it was more stuff like cottage pie and not a roast.

I don't make plans for christmas this early but if I see anything for christmas dinner or christmas gifts cheap I do get them early, I hate shopping in December, too busy and too many queues and I can't stand for long anyway and need to do it without kids, plus being on a tight budget makes it easier. Sunday lunch we have every week but a traditional sunday lunch probably once each month, would do it more regular but can't because of budget, we usually have vegetarian meals instead because it's cheaper to make. But now I don't think your odd we all do things the way thats best for our families. ;)

@NotOdd I gave up on Sunday roasts when I realised I was spending the whole of Sunday in the kitchen/a roast isn't necessarily healthy for humans or the planet/it's dull, and when looking after sick relatives/studying/having to do extra work at home took over. We cook something "nice" for Sunday but rarely a roast. You're not "odd", but maybe a bit afraid to try something different. Christmas planned? Are you on glue? It's July. We're in a global pandemic BTW 🙄

We absolutely had Sunday roast every week when I was growing up. But this was in the eighties and nineties in NW England. Perhaps things have changed now.

We like to have a roast most Sundays but the kids are not over keen. We usually have it in the evening though otherwise it takes up the whole time anywhere is open.

I anticipate being asked about Christmas in about October.

[quote CallmeBadJanet]@NotOdd I gave up on Sunday roasts when I realised I was spending the whole of Sunday in the kitchen/a roast isn't necessarily healthy for humans or the planet/it's dull, and when looking after sick relatives/studying/having to do extra work at home took over. We cook something "nice" for Sunday but rarely a roast. You're not "odd", but maybe a bit afraid to try something different. Christmas planned? Are you on glue? It's July. We're in a global pandemic BTW 🙄[/quote]
I think a good roast dinner is far from dull! It smells gorgeous and tastes lovely as long as it is all properly cooked and seasoned, and gravy made well with the meat juices. A roast is actually quite easy to do too, it is only the veg peeling etc which takes time (my husband absolutely loved doing veg!); however it's possible to buy ready prepared vegetables.

Most people have dishwashers nowadays too which makes life easier.

Yum! I could polish off roast and Yorkshires right now.

We have Sunday din dins twice a month but I normally do it at tea time 5.30/6pm when everyone is in & my DD works Sundays too so I like to fresh for her & my GD to eat. Other times we have salad for pie & mash.

I know a lot of people that love a Sunday roast, it's a weekly tradition for them. I don't do it personally but I don't get the backwards bit?!

Thinking of Xmas before summer has even finished though is too soon for me especially in current climate, no one knows what's going to be happening with social distancing etc but I think its nice to look forward to things so why not!

Your not odd. I have a Sunday roast every week... As does my family and nearly everyone I know. I'm pretty sure in the 'old days' when your grandparents were around it was pretty standard Sunday roast on Sundays and fish on Fridays?

Most companies start advertising their Christmas party packages in July... And most work places start booking and reserving this far in advance so 🤷‍♀️

I start buying for Christmas as early as May... And definitely by July. I've already got loads of stuff for my kid. I've already booked disneyland trip for us at Christmas and a legoland santa sleepover.... And I've even looked up dates for Christmas at centre parcs for Dec 2021....because I like to book and spread the cost out.... Its not affordable for me to just book last minute, it's not being organised and it usually costs more.

We do a Sunday lunch of sorts most weeks, buts it’s not always a roast dinner, sometimes it’s a cottage pie, stew, bangers and mash, toad in the hole etc. It’s not weird if you do or don’t, I think it’s just a habit of old that Hasn’t died out for some:

No Christmas plans here yet though!

I have a Sunday roast pretty much every Sunday, unless it's boiling hot outside. Saves me thinking of something to cook! Can't bear to think about Christmas much before November however. But I know friends who start to look forward to it on the 21st June when the days start to get shorter!

I've already started planning xmas. We're having it at mine and I actually bought my first present today

I'm from the north too, if that's the backwards area! We have a roast on Sunday for the usual early evening meal maybe once in about 4 weeks in autumn and winter. But never as a habit and never for lunch. (And it's a vegetarian roast with all the trimmings as we don't eat meat.) This because my husband likes a roast with lots of spuds and gravy. But I thought we were unusual - nobody I know eats roasts at all, or def not on a regular basis. We much more often have pasta or curry or pizza with veg or salad on Sundays.