To worry when 10yr DD went for an early run alone

[BelleBoyd]

My DD woke me early this morning saying she was going for a run and left. She kept to our road and was back in half hour. Is this ok? Just seems unusual behaviour? She hasn’t done this before and doesn’t run usually as a sport.

How's her relationship with food and body image? Perhaps she was trying to increase her exercise?

When I was 11 and all through my teens, I often woke very early and would get up before anyone was awake to go for a walk miles along the river bank , alone, very rarely seeing anyone else. I loved the isolation, privacy, the morning dew, smells, bird song; it was a very special time and I still remember.

   The path to independence and self confidence  starts from   handholding and   small steps ,  then bigger steps, letting go their hand, letting them out of sight, etc.  The best preparation is   establishing  mutual trust in her  common sense.

Still fast asleep at 7.30am OP, really? That’s late for most people on a weekday.

Eh? When my children were in primary they had to be there at 9. We got up at 8.15 - breakfast, wash, teeth, dressed, ten minutes walk to school. Packed lunch and bags packed the night before.

MN really is another world at times.

You said she has anxiety and normally does loads of sports.my da used to go to the park when he was 11/12 and goon the swings- he said it helped his mind calm itself as he focused on doing that.She was sensible as in she told you and also kept to your road.maybe she wanted to try it as a way of calming herself.I would find out what the sudden urge was to do it and if it’s that then maybe find a way to help her with the running. I live rurally - lots of kids are doing far more things around the village by themselves- riding-running etc even ones as young as your dc

Mine does this all the time. Gets into his head he needs to stay fit and takes off. Good for her, taking control of her health.

@Raimona

What makes 7:30 a.m. any more dangerous than 11a.m.? There are more people around at 11am. More witnesses if you’re attacked. More people around to intervene. Most attacks happen in isolated places at night or in the early morning when nobody is around.

What about when you have to go to work?
I go in my own car. Prior to having a car, when I used to get the bus it was more like 8am and other people were around. If I had to go out particularly early I carried a pepper spray. Also OP didn’t say what time her DD went out, it could have been 6am or something.

From pepper spray I guess you;re not in UK.

For the sake of this thread it would be very instructive to know which country a woman doesn't feel safe to be alone in a wood, on a quiet path, in early morning etc.

I am a small woman in UK; all my life I have often walked alone in woods, quiet paths, lonely places, city streets , early in the morning, late at night and I have never, ever been attacked, stalked, threatened etc.
I don't even know any woman who has ever been attacked, threatened etc by a stranger while she was out alone.

For the sake of this thread it would be very instructive to know which country a woman doesn't feel safe to be alone in a wood, on a quiet path, in early morning etc.

There was a thread a while ago, asking if people would be OK going for a walk alone, in daylight, in isolated countryside. A huge number of replies were from women in the UK, who said they wouldn't be comfortable doing that. I was really shocked (and sad) that so many women are limiting their lives in this way. I can imagine if you've had a bad experience, then you'd be nervous, but to routinely think you weren't safe?
I just feel so sad for the women who live their lives like this.

I go out walking in the woods about 7.15 am most mornings and I sometimes feel a bit uncomfortable and nervous! But then I watch far too many scary movies so I have an over active mind!

I don't even know any woman who has ever been attacked, threatened etc by a stranger while she was out alone

Lucky you

I've lived in all sorts of locations (in England) ranging from London to rural Cumbria. I've always happily walked around unaccompanied at all hours of the day. The women I know who have been assaulted have suffered that at the hands of people they know or met socially, not by strangers on the street or out on a walk. I know it happens, but it is not a common occurrence. Driving a car is a far greater risk to life and limb.

I tend to go to places that are not too isolated, but that is not just because I can feel slightly uncomfortable but also because I am quite clumsy and can trip over the smallest thing and am quite good at getting lost!

I was also followed once walking home from the bus stop when I was at college. I lived in a village and the bus stop was in another village. The quickest route home was down a lane and then across 2 fields. The other way was on a main road. I was dithering about deciding which route to take and the man was following whichever way I went, it was quite scary.

That old trope about women only ever being assaulted in their own homes by someone they already know is still doing the rounds, I see.

ILikeGin Those were exactly my thoughts. The notion of someone wanting to exercise because they enjoy it seems alien to some people on here. As if exercise is something no-one ever wants to do and so they must surely be lying to cover something up! 😆

I said upthread it sounded like the sort of impulsive thing which would have popped into my mind at that age, and as though she feels in need of more exercise, but to not let her get out of sight next time. But thinking about it i'd also say that if you feel anything a bit off about itthen i'd listen to your intuition and work out where your feeling has come from, you may be sensing that there is something more behind it that she'd want to talk about - only you know your feelings about this.

Rhine
Still fast asleep at 7.30am OP, really? That’s late for most people on a weekday.

No it Is not late

That old trope about women only ever being assaulted in their own homes by someone they already know is still doing the rounds, I see.

Nobody said 'only ever'. According to the rapecrisis.org.uk website, approximately 90% of women who are raped knew their attacker prior to the assault.

That doesn't render quiet places at off peak times safe.

This thread is utterly insane. And why am I singled out as “there’s always one?!” Weirdo! Thankfully there are still a minority of non neurotic Daily Mail readers on this site.

@Rhine

Still fast asleep at 7.30am OP, really? That’s late for most people on a weekday.

Seems a pretty lame excuse for not getting up to see what she was doing.

Just because it's late for most people doesn't mean it's late or unusual for the OP. What an unhelpful comment.

I sleep in some weekday mornings until 8.30 am or sometimes even 9.30 am because I can and I want to. And that's with a 6 year old.

My 11 yr old often goes for a run, usually for about 45 mins, has his phone and knows the route well. We are in a rural areas though.

Bateshotel So what age will your children be before they are allowed out without you?

So they aren’t allowed out on their own but they can walk to school??

It’s like putting your kids under house arrest. My girls (11 and 14) would be climbing the walls under that regime 🙄 as would I. Happy memories of bike rides and trips to town with pals from 11 onwards.