To tell people that my twins are five?

[lukasiak]

Even though they technically don't turn five until November?

Dh is in a right hump about it. He thinks by me telling everybody that they are already five that it makes people place age inappropriate expectations on them. I think it's all just semantics, and those who actually need to know their real age know it. It's a bad habit I picked up from my mother, and my older children have survived me rounding their age up once their birthdays drew close with out being labelled as having additional needs, as seems to be DH's primary concern.

Is it really that big of a deal?

OP you sound stranger and stranger.

Your twins are nowhere near 5.

In fact, by telling people they're five right now, you're placing them in the school year above (unless you're in Scotland).

WEIRD. really weird!

Why not just round up to the nearest ten?

I'm imagining you as one of those people who says, "Oh, we always do that!" as if it somehow explains every bonkers, nonsensical habit.

Ds16 decides at 13 that he wanted to attend a specialist sports academy on the opposite side of the world that would cost me almost £50k a year? You best believe that I made it happen. On the flip side, Dd13 decides that she would rather attend the local high school rather than the private school I had picked out for her?

'Almost £50k' - is that actually £2.5k pa in your speak?

I think the above examples might be a bit off piste for some folks too, although nothing on the scale of continually LYING about your kids ages for no reason.

Can imagine being invited to their birthday party -

Me: How old are the twins?
OP: 5
Me: OK Great

Turns up with a Happy 6th Birthday card, a big 6 balloon, and presents aimed at ages 6+

Why would you not just say their actual age? Any way you cut it their age starts with a 4. Whether that’s 4 and a half or 4 and 10 months it doesn’t matter. They’re still not 5. Would you have told everyone that they were 1 when they were only 6months? Thought not

To say “they’ll be five next birthday” - fine. Loads of people do that, although it’s a little soon to be doing it now for November, IMO.

“They’re five on Friday” immediately before the birthday - fine.

“They’re five”, when they’re not.... no.

Sorry but that’s properly weord

@Butchyrestingface

Ds16 decides at 13 that he wanted to attend a specialist sports academy on the opposite side of the world that would cost me almost £50k a year? You best believe that I made it happen. On the flip side, Dd13 decides that she would rather attend the local high school rather than the private school I had picked out for her?

'Almost £50k' - is that actually £2.5k pa in your speak?

I think the above examples might be a bit off piste for some folks too, although nothing on the scale of continually LYING about your kids ages for no reason.

I walked right into that one

I'm not lying; to me they are 5, but I'm willing to admit Ibu and make an effort to change.

Quick quiz, @lukasiak.

1. How do you feel about screaming in response to all the beautiful sights in the Sistine Chapel?

1. Do you entertain your guests on the driveway because you don't want them in the house?

1. Do you offer lifts to your broken-shouldered neighbour's shopping bags but expect the neighbour herself to actually walk home?

1. Do you think that it's unforgivably intrusive for people to go round to pick up mail from their neighbours?

*Asking for a friend.

I'm not lying; to me they are 5, but I'm willing to admit Ibu and make an effort to change

I'm happy to hear you intend on changing, hopefully that's the case for all your children but I honesty don't see how it's not lying .

Why? Confused.

They are 4.... when someone asks how old they are you say 4...

I'm so confused... my birthday is in 5 days... i'm still the age I am until 5 days time.

I have 2 October babies, they are both the age that they are, and I will not say their new age, until there birthday.

I don't understand the benefit to saying they are an age they are not? even if they are close to it... what's the purpose?

to me they are 5

But they’re not 5. You can’t just make up the rules on time passage

I'm not lying; to me they are 5, but I'm willing to admit Ibu and make an effort to change

How can be 5 "to you" when you know you know they are 4?

Do you not understand how age WORKS?

"Well, officer, yes I did bludgeon that tail gaiter over the head with my trusty shovel but TO ME, he's totally uninjured so can I just go on my way?"

I'm with your DH entirely on this one, especially younger children, and multiples at that as they tend to be premature as it is.

The age expectations of people will be greater. Especially 5 year olds who people will automatically assume have acquired school manners and skills to some degree.

And November is a long way away still to be thinking their birthday counts now ... it really doesn't.

I'm not lying; to me they are 5

They are unarguably, factually, four years old.

If you have some problems distinguishing fact from fiction then you need some sort of psychological assessment. It’s terrifying that you don’t even know when you are lying. Not to mention all the other weird shit about your parenting.

Seriously, you need help.

What? They're not even CLOSE to 5! That's really, really weird.

At that age, 4 months can make a huge difference! Plus, if you were to tell someone a child was 5 right now, they'd assume the child was about to go up into Year 1... When actually your twins haven't yet started Reception. That's not fair on them. Your DH is absolutely right.

I have twins as well. They are 3 and a half. Their birthday is in mid-January. I tell people they are 3 and a half.

If you have some problems distinguishing fact from fiction then you need some sort of psychological assessment. It’s terrifying that you don’t even know when you are lying.

Tbf, I'm only 27 years old. Even though my birth certificate says I was born in 1978.

Maybe I should join the OP on the couch for that evaluation.

I think everyone is being a bit harsh to the OP.
I don't agree with her, but if that's how she has been brought up than is it any surprise why the OP thinks its the normal approach to saying dc ages.
If you decide to change your approach ( and I suggest you do otherwise ppl will get different ages depending if they ask you or your DH) than add the word 'nearly' or 'just over' I think it will be easier to make the transition.

@Butchyrestingface

Quick quiz, *@lukasiak*.

1. How do you feel about screaming in response to all the beautiful sights in the Sistine Chapel?

1. Do you entertain your guests on the driveway because you don't want them in the house?

1. Do you offer lifts to your broken-shouldered neighbour's shopping bags but expect the neighbour herself to actually walk home?

1. Do you think that it's unforgivably intrusive for people to go round to pick up mail from their neighbours?

*Asking for a friend.

1. It's the only appropriate reaction. If the other guests and my partner can't appreciate the outpouring of emotion, they're not cultured enough to be there.

1. Doesn't everybody? Their husband's could be work men. Am I supposed to just risk letting somebody of that class use my prestine family safe toilet?

1. Every Thursday morning. I even have a key for safe delievery. Burrowed it from under the compost bin.

1. 999 is my most phoned number for this exact reason.

I'm not lying; to me they are 5

That is very odd. Must be very frustrating for those around you to hear lying said as a factual statement.

Seriously weird and why are you trying to make them older than they are. They are not 5! My daughter is 6 in the autumn but I am holding on to her being 5 as long as possible

Until the day you turn 5 you're 4!

Who are all these people asking their age! How weird. And tbh at their age my son would have piped up with "Mummy, Im four not five" anyway!!

I agree with your dh. My son is 3 in less than a week. If anyone asks how old he is I say 2, 3 at the end of July or nearly 3.