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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think most women keep hair long to be attractive to the opposite sex?

999 replies

Ilovegreentomatoes · 19/07/2020 22:33

It's always been said men prefer long hair it looks more feminine etc.
I know many women hate having their hair short and are devastated if their hairdresser cuts of more than an inch.What is the obsession with long hair? I have fine hair and cut it short because long hair looks crap on me but I'm definitely in the minority. Even women who look better with short hair because of their hair texture insist on keeping it long. Do you think that's because we are subconsciously taught mainly by men that long hair is more attractive. Plus all teen girls have that uniform ultra long hair there is no diversity. And no I'm not jealous because I have short hair!(well very short bob to be fair.)

OP posts:
Thread gallery
24
squeekums · 21/07/2020 00:10

@Phoebesgift

Do all the women with long hair not colour or highlight their hair? I have long hair too but have expensive and time consuming colour maintenance.
I home dye, much cheaper, buy all the stuff online, cheaper again. I trim own hair after a butcher job from a hairdresser that left my hair above my shoulders as a kid, scarred me for life
squeekums · 21/07/2020 00:14

@ComeOnBabyPopMyBubble your colour is amazing, love it!

NoMoreMrNiceGaius · 21/07/2020 00:15

A lot of women keep their hair long because even though in a lot of ways it's more maintenance, it's also a lot easier to style. If you have thick/frizzy/a ton of hair, it's very hard to get it looking nice without heat-styling it.

AmericanAdventure · 21/07/2020 00:51

Long hair here because.... It's easy. I wash, leave it to dry naturally and can tie it back quickly. It's versatile. It's cheap, I don't need to spend £40-60 every six weeks maintaining a short 'style'. It keeps my neck warm. I can pretend I have a moustache. I tickle my kids with it. I use it to floss my teeth in desperate situations. I think I'd probably look better with a proper hair do but I don't really care.

MulticolourMophead · 21/07/2020 01:43

Long hair on anyone over 40 looks awful. Shoulder length at most. Also women who still hang onto extra long hair look ridiculous.

What a load of bollocks. One of the most glamourous looking women I've seen recently is over 60 and has waist length white hair. Gorgeous.

nanny2012nanny · 21/07/2020 01:57

Your going to the wrong hairdresser!
Short hair can and does look amazing.
Much less hassle / time to dry. Wax and dry shampoo become your friends

Shmurf · 21/07/2020 02:25

What a load of bollocks. One of the most glamourous looking women I've seen recently is over 60 and has waist length white hair. Gorgeous.

Agreed. Short hair makes a lot of women look like man haters IMO.

eaglejulesk · 21/07/2020 02:50

Knob off with the ageism.

So, let me get this right. People aren't allowed to say things such as older people shouldn't have long hair, but others are at liberty to talk about "Karen" or "Speak to the Manager" (incidentally, I have never heard such a rubbish thing) haircuts? Good old MN double standards again.

ChangeThePassword · 21/07/2020 05:10

Short hair makes a lot of women look like man haters IMO

Omg, that's hilarious!

So some people think short hair makes women look like men, and now we've got this too! What does a man hater look like? A man? 😂

ChangeThePassword · 21/07/2020 05:17

Do all the women with long hair not colour or highlight their hair? I have long hair too but have expensive and time consuming colour maintenance

You've answered your own question. Some women with long hair colour their hair.

Personally, as someone that has long hair because I can't be bothered to get it cut regularly, I am happy to let the world see my grey hair coming through. For me, it would be a waste of time and money, and would look way worse than the grey as it grew out for way too long before I did anything about it.

Galvantula · 21/07/2020 05:18

YABU

I keep it long because I hate getting it cut.

I don't give a monkeys what men think. DH does actually like it really long, but I still get a load chopped off when it bothers me, because I don't like it long.

If I could figure out a way to be low maintenance, I'd totally consider a short cut. I'd need to be brave enough to deal with the inevitable wtf comments though by the sounds of it.

As it is I keep it long enough to tie back out the way.

Nightbirdcackle · 21/07/2020 05:32

I would have my hair cut short if it suited me, which it doesn't. I'd love to have a short bob like the OP but my face is way too chubby! It's not about attracting men, I just prefer how I look with long hair.

I think it's a fashion thing as well? There seemed to be far more women and girls with short crops when I was young. It's been years since I saw a girl under 16 with short hair now.

eaglejulesk · 21/07/2020 08:18

Short hair makes a lot of women look like man haters IMO

What utter crap!

Lweji · 21/07/2020 08:24

Speaking about the Karen haircut is like talking about the Rachel haircut. Or the Golden Girls haircuts. It's a reference.
(And I think the meme itself is misogynistic crap)

Saying older women shouldn't have hair one way or another, just for reaching a magic age is simply bullshit and ageism.

Gatr · 21/07/2020 08:28

My wife prefers my (female) hair long. We arent all trying to attract men!

I prefer long hair because

  1. i look like my mum with short hair
  2. my hair is a bit unruly when short
  3. i like to have options in terms of styling, i like having the option for changing it up eg plaits, buns and fringes. 4)im indecisive (see above) and hate the process of growing short hair out. I like short hair but its so much work when you need to grow out parts for a different style, even if its just a different style of short hair. I hate the inbetween stage. 5)its less work at times. For me short hair required many more hairdresser tips, a few weeks of growth really made a massive difference and needed much more deliberate styling/ faffing in the mirror.
thecatsarecrazy · 21/07/2020 08:33

I don't have a very feminine face so I would look like a man with short hair. Some ladies look very nice with a pixi cut or similar. Wouldn't suit me at all

BigKnickers87 · 21/07/2020 08:38

I hate my hair short. It doesn’t suit me and there’s nothing practical I can do with it. Nothing to do with what any men might think!!!

bettybr2020 · 21/07/2020 08:41

I have a rounder face and that's why I keep my hair longer. I have had it shorter recently and add extensions for volume as I feel longer hair makes you feel more confident

Sweetmotherofallthatisholyabov · 21/07/2020 08:44

I probably prefer my hair shorter and think it looks well, but when it's that short I can't tie it up and I need to blow dry it and straighten it or it looks ridiculous and I can't be bothered so long for me.

Thateverlastingyes77 · 21/07/2020 08:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LolaSmiles · 21/07/2020 08:45

I've had it several lengths and I like it long. Being able to tie it up is so much easier than having to style short hair every day.

I wouldn't like it if my hairdresser got the length wrong. When I had mid length hair a former hairdresser kept cutting it an inch too short and the result was it sat between my collar bone and shoulder and flicked out overnight meaning I had to style it all every morning instead of being able to brush and go. If I'm paying for a haircut then I want it to work for me.

Looking attractive to men doesn't come into it.

MotherMorph · 21/07/2020 08:47

My DM had really curly hair, we always wanted her to grow it long when we were kids but when she was older she did and it just seemed to grow outwards instead of long, which wasnt flattering at all.

SerenDippitty · 21/07/2020 09:22

This “I would look like a man with short hair” is curious. I have never met a short haired woman and not been sure whether she was a woman or not. There is more to looking manly than your hair length.

pencilfulloflead92 · 21/07/2020 09:26

I keep my hair long because Iike how it looks, it suits me. Not because of what a man may or may not think

chubbyhotchoc · 21/07/2020 09:29

Why do women so vehemently deny they're bothered about what the opposite sex thinks of their appearance as though it's some sign of weakness or something to be of ashamed of? It's such a non issue