Is being a short man equivalent to a women who is overweight?

[DreamChaser23]

i had this discussion with someone and I feel there is some truth in it.

Men who are overweight get away a lot more than women who are overweight I.e. relationships aren't as negatively affected compared to women.

And short women in height don't suffer as much as short men. Just look at how the media made people believe that most ideal men are meant to be tall over 6 feet. When in reality the average height of men is around 5 foot 9 IN the US and 5 foot 10 UK.

Being a short man and a women who is overweight does make it harder when it comes to relationships

No. Being a moderately overweight woman is almost the norm. And women would be just as likely to find a heavily overweight man as unattractive as a short man.

Imo the real inequality lies in the fact that women (particularly ones in the public eye) are generally judged on their appearance (not just weight - also the way they dress, their make-up etc) far more than men are, even when an attractive appearance is irrelevantto their job (e.g. politician). If anything, compared with the judgment about levels of fashion and personal grooming, weight is far more equally judged in both sexes.

@MoistMolly

Personality wise, short men generally = "Karen"

This is the sort of weird generalisation that people make about short men quite happily.

Or the whinge on about short man syndrome.

Thing is, there are loads of short men who are totally lovely. And some who are dicks. Just like average height men. Or tall men.

Imagine if someone posted on MN ‘personality wise, overweight women = easy stereotype currently popular on Twitter’.

Short men are pitied.

Fat women are despised.

I agree with this. It doesn’t affect most of us who are married / in long term relationships but when you’re single appearance is currency and a tall man is more valued than a short man in the same way a slim woman is viewed as objectively more desirable than a larger one. Completely shallow but the dating world is!

Possibly in relationships, but not in "life in general" . Short is viewed as something a person can't help being, so a short man might get jokes or comments, but they won't be anywhere near as vicious as those aimed at an overweight woman. Fat is viewed as self inflicted and an insult to the people who have to look at it, fat people are vilified, mocked, and frequently told they are a burden on the NHS etc. Fat shaming is the last bastion of "allowable" abuse, and much more is aimed at women than overweight men.

No that's not correct, there is research to show that short men are less likely to be successful in their careers than tall men.

@Tinamou

No that's not correct, there is research to show that short men are less likely to be successful in their careers than tall men.

Quite a few successful film stars are short. But yes generally this is right but it is often as a result of taller men benefitting from unconscious or possibly even conscious bias.

I don't have a thing about height. I like to be able to look straight into their eyes. I'm short and don't want to feel like a child next to my partner.

@DollyDoneMore

Short men are pitied.

Fat women are despised.

This. I dated a shirt guy once, all his friends would constantly make jokes about it - he really couldn't escape the fact he was short

@DollyDoneMore

Short men are pitied.

Fat women are despised.

This. I dated a shirt guy once, all his friends would constantly make jokes about it - he really couldn't escape the fact he was short

Actually I found the really tall men I dated to have more passive/weak personalities, not the manly confidence I expected.

Whereas shorter men seem to be more manly in personality (like a nice version of short man syndrome I guess, maybe they work on their personal qualities more?)

I’ve heard the short guy career thing before but wonder if it’s a third factor issue?

middle class/richer demographic tends to have better diet and health and be taller so will have better educational outcomes which in turn equals better career success.

Wealth = huge common factor which overrides a lot of things.

My bmi is 19 and I like clothes, walking through posh areas of London I can feel very chubby and badly dressed compared to the women there!

I kinda agree, I've always thought that women saying they're only into tall men is shallow, like men saying they only like blonde women with large breasts or something

Going by the men Ive dated this made me LOL. I'm 5'10" and have tried dating shorter men. It was a disaster. I never made their height an issue but by God they certainly did. I got constantly told not to wear heels because it made them look short, told I was too tall etc etc I wont ever date a man shorter than me ever again after that vile behaviour. In my experience, "short man syndrome" is definitely a thing.

In my experience mildly overweight women are often still in demand (but maybe not if they hang out in groups with drop dead gorgeous size 8 friends!). Shorter men often aren’t and I have known even short women to be brutal in their rejections of men they deem too short (but who are taller than them).

In my experience there is some truth in this too!

www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/tall-man-thinks-its-an-achievement-20190215182505

'Being a short man and a women who is overweight does make it harder when it comes to relationships'

Wow. 🤔

Only if the man is extremely short or the woman extremely fat, I think.

What a horrid sort of discussion. So I guess you are all men over 5'10 and women under 9 stone?

I like kind and funny. Not stupid preferably. Height has honestly never entered into it. We're the same height. I'm not sure it's sensible to choose a partner on the basis of height or weight.

Yes but also older women (age more an issue for women) and unattractive women

Being overweight and attractive is less of an issue imo

Do you mean harder when it comes to being chosen for a relationship or for being loved enough to be valued when you're in one?

The height issue for men is also well studied and documented:

Height and Reproductive Success in a Cohort of British Men

I get mocked all the time (from men) for being 5ft1. Doesn't affect me.

@Lucky2Be

I get mocked all the time (from men) for being 5ft1. Doesn't affect me.

I'm a woman by the way!

@DollyDoneMore

Short men are pitied.

Fat women are despised.

By you, maybe.

I don't pity short men at all - I admire them.

I don't in any way despise obese women - I feel sorry for them.

And in both cases I don't judge them by their appearance.

What's wrong with you lot?

I know you're trying to get at 'subtle' preconceptions or judgements about height in men and weight in women - but actually a lot of these comments just sound a bit superior.

@Lucky2Be

I get mocked all the time (from men) for being 5ft1. Doesn't affect me.

Really? I'm just 5'3" and have never been mocked for it.

I think there's a lot of truth in this.

I see a lot of threads/comments saying "I only fancy tall men / don't fancy short men".

And okay you can't help who you fancy etc etc. But I always think it's a bit mean and shallow, like a man saying they only fancy skinny women with big boobs.

I always think there must be an untapped dating pool of nice/attractive single men who happen to be on the short side!

I saw a thread recently complaining that a man had slightly embellished his height on OLD - but then people were admitting they'd never have given him a chance if he'd put his actual height, so what's he meant to do? Okay he shouldn't lie, but neither should the majority of women rule him out on height alone. Same goes for men ruling out women over a size 8-10.

And you have a point, many women do look for taller men, and many men prefer slimmer women. These are well known facts

^This.

Im 5'7" and never attracted to tall men for some reason. My height or couple of inches taller is ok. But I don't meet many women who feel the same at all, most like men to be 6' at least. Back when I dabbled in online dating I'd see loads of men's profiles specifying they didn't want an overweight woman. & Equally, women specifying preferred height for a man. It's a good reflection of society.