DH holds his knife like a pen

[user8558]

It drives me nuts.

It's pathetic that it irritates me the way it does. I don't nag him. I don't even bring it up (once ten years ago I did point out it wasn't the correct way, he asked what it was to me, I said it drives me crazy but that that's my issue)

It drives me silently crazy every day.

I'm ridiculous, why can't I just let it go?

I eat my peas with honey;
I've done it all my life.
It makes the peas taste funny,
But it keeps them on the knife.

ANON

That may well not have been her who wrote it, but it has Pam Ayres written all over it!

@Cosmos45

Not quite the same but I don't think I could be with anyone who just abandoned their knife and fork on a plate when finished rather than lining them up against each other. I remember years ago doing out for lunch with a colleague who just left his knife and fork where they fell and I couldn't go out for lunch with him ever again it wound me up so much.

Now this custom is for the very practical purpose of making your host/waiter/waitress's life easier by showing at a glance who has finished eating. As such it should be wholly without controversy but I'm sure someone will be along shortly to let us know if not.

And here it is. Knife and fork together when finished eating, definitely. BUT I was watching some eating/ cooking TV the other day and someone insisted that it was correct to not just put them together in front of you, but to then move them as a pair to the side of the plate. Quarter past three position. ???? Never seen this before. Am I just too ignorant to have known about this? I won't be doing it, looked untidy.

anyone wondering about the pea squishing thing - it is simply because table etiquette forbids using the fork as a spoon. I've often wondered why none of the etiquette setters didn't just introduce (yet) another implement and bring in a pea-spoon. Or use a fancy small runcible spoon for them.

Not putting your knife and fork together when you've finished is just... nope. No words for that

YABU It's not really an issue to me, unless he starts eating his meals from a trough let it go.

I once had a bf who could manage to use a knife at all. He used a fork and his fingers. Let's just say we didn't eat out very often.

So uncivilised to use a knife at the table. That's why God invented chopsticks. Why don't people realise how boorish it is to use a knife at the table.

@longwayoff

This is correct. Its so that the person who clears the plates can collect both plate and cutlery at the same time by holding the cutlery to the plate with their thumb.

Otherwise it's really awkward and you risk getting the dirty cutlery slide off the plate and into the diners lap or getting waaay to up close and personal with the diner to adjust the cutlery to pick up correctly.

Thank you @smashtastic, I've never seen it before in 68 years of living and eating. Obviously not moving in the right circles

I only know as I used to work as a silver service waitress for some very posh government/upperclass banquets in my twenties. 🙂

[quote Smashtastic]@longwayoff

This is correct. Its so that the person who clears the plates can collect both plate and cutlery at the same time by holding the cutlery to the plate with their thumb.

Otherwise it's really awkward and you risk getting the dirty cutlery slide off the plate and into the diners lap or getting waaay to up close and personal with the diner to adjust the cutlery to pick up correctly.[/quote]
Not according to Debretts

"When finished, the knife and fork (with tines facing upwards) or spoon etc are placed on the plate in a six-thirty position."

www.debretts.com/expertise/etiquette/table-manners/table-rules/

That would really annoy me

"The honorable and upright man keeps well away from both the slaughterhouse and the kitchen. And he allows no knives on his table." Confucius

Gosh, I must be making it up then. 😂

@WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll

I eat my peas with honey; I've done it all my life. It makes the peas taste funny, But it keeps them on the knife.

ANON

That may well not have been her who wrote it, but it has Pam Ayres written all over it!

I have always thought this was Spike Milligan. It was certainly in one of his books I had when I was a child.

I would have said the knife and fork go at 5.25 (clockface) when you've finished a meal. I too was trained in silver service (in the Late Middle Ages, in my case). Waiting well is a real skilled. Good service can turn a mediocre meal into something special. It's so underrated. So many restaurants don't seem to understand this.

@Shedbuilder

I would have said the knife and fork go at 5.25 (clockface) when you've finished a meal. I too was trained in silver service (in the Late Middle Ages, in my case). Waiting well is a real skilled. Good service can turn a mediocre meal into something special. It's so underrated. So many restaurants don't seem to understand this.

You are wrong about clock face according to Debretts.

@Smashtastic

Gosh, I must be making it up then. 😂

I didn't say that - I said Debretts says otherwise.

Debretts is just for parvenus, surely?

My DSS14 does it and also licks the knife.
He used to eat with his mouth open too and wolf his food down and I've only manage to convince him to close his mouth now.
The rest? I just don't look.