If you have a 13 year old who's out a lot, what time do they have to be home by?

[DontBiteTheBoobThatFeedsYou]

I'm being nagged and need some perspective.

I wondered what time other people's 13 year olds need to be home by?

My sons friends seem to be out until last 8pm, and is incredulous that I ask him to be home by 6.30pm.

Do you know where he is and who he is with, when he is out? I think that is more important than the time he has to be in by. And why 6.30? Is it for your evening meal? If so, could you eat a bit later and let him stay out a bit longer?

9pm is the norm here / 10 on weekends So long as parents know vaguely where they are and homework, the usual gubbins is done first.

6.30 pm is ridiculously early, my niece is 10 and she's allowed to play in her close (( cup de sac of kids that run between houses )) later than that 😳

Where are they and who with though? Have you given up.on social distancing etc?

6.30pm is far, far too early for a 13yo.

When I was that age it was 9pm as standard, but it could be later if I was doing something like going to the cinema.

It depends. If my daughter went out after school from 3:30 I would want to see her around 6:30 (to make sure she’s still alive) but if she was going out after eating her dinner it would be around 9pm.

I’m incredulous too. 6.30 is ridiculously early.

Depends where and who with as others have said. Just roaming the streets (or going to the local corner shop as they call it), no later than 8pm. If out on our cul-de-sac (or at a neighbours friends house pre-covid), 9pm weekdays, 10pm weekends.

She's in by dinner time, 6pm.

If she's at a friend's house for dinner, I'd like her home by 8pm, with a responsible adult escorting her home, either me or her dad picking her up, or the friend's parent bringing her home.

Mine weren't allowed, just out, not at night anyway.
Peer pressure is rife for drugs and alcohol, of course they can say no, but they lose their mates.
get him to choose mates that don't hang around at night and you'll have none of those worries.

Same as @Goyle. 6pm on school nights.

Mine are small but when I was that age it was 9pm and 10pm on weekends and I thought that was early 😂
Is he in for the evening at 6.30? Or dinner and Back out?

It depends on the area and what time it gets dark. If it's a safe, quiet place and they are hanging round in the local park or similar in summer I would allow 8.30. In a less safe area I would be a lot more careful.

I didn't realise this was so common? My 13 year old has never roamed the streets other than walking home from school with friends. I don't think I'd be happy about her just hanging out who knows where until such a late time people are saying. Definitely not during a pandemic anyway.

Just to add, every single one of the group's of teenagers I've seen in the park have not been social distancing.

@devlesko I agree

Actually, 8pm roaming the streets is only in summer when it's light but they don't typically go outside much in the winter anyway.

OP: I really struggled with the going out and what time to come home too when we moved house 18 months ago. I didn't really have the opportunity to anything other than an organised activity like go to a friends house (planned) or the cinema and on our street, there weren't many families. Then we moved and it was like a whole new world and I really hated it at first. But I gradually got used to it. Maybe try extending the time by half an hour each week and you'll find that it's OK. I've always said to my daughter that she must let me know if she's going to be back later or she's going somewhere different than planned and she is pretty sensible.

When/where does your son eat dinner? I'd have no trouble with ds being out until 8:30 but he's starving by 6:30 and I'm not waiting until he gets back to cook. My ds knows how to cook a quick meal so knows that if he comes home later than normal then he'd be cooking his own dinner.

In winter I'd want him home earlier because it's darker earlier. I know that crime can happen in the day but he's too young to be out hours after dark

Didn't realise you could roam about all day and night long during lockdown🤔 I must have missed that somehow.

There's no limit in England

It depends where 'out' is, who they are with and what they are doing.

Limit to how long obviously gatherings are supposed to be 6 people or less

Our nearly 14 year old doesn't go out with friends without an adult. Kids should not be roaming around with no purpose, especially not in a pandemic

Sostenueto what's with the smug 🤔?? Groups of six 2 meters apart can roam where they like in England.

I am glad my DS loves his xbox so much !