To ask for your controversial parenting tips?!

[Napqueen1234]

No judgement here. I want to know what you do day to day that works for you/your family but others may think are a bit crazy or controversial.

Today I told a friend that every day when kids are in bed (3 and 1) I tidy the whole downstairs and put all toys away so I can have a completely toy/child free evening. we just have one living room so all their toys downstairs are there and I can’t relax unless it’s tidy. It takes maybe 5/10 mins and is so worth it. My friend was shocked and said she could never be bothered to do that every day (fair enough) and thought it was mad considering it gets immediately destroyed by 6:30 the next morning. I wouldn’t even consider not tidying but to each their own and wouldn’t matter to me if someone else didn’t!

Ok not particularly controversial but anyone else have anything more juicy??

I park my 4 month old in front of Hey Duggee a couple of times a week so I can get dressed and eat breakfast in peace. I’d like to think that if we weren’t in lockdown I would be less lazy...

Make sure the kids know who is boss. Of course my kids have a say things, we listen and regard their feelings etc, but at the end of the day what we say goes. We are the parents, I will not be walked over.

@ThickFast she was beyond useless!

I FF, used a dummy, had a routine from 6 weeks, weaned at 3.5 months, dressed DS in proper outfits from birth, had his ear pierced, I spend a lot of money on birthdays and Christmas presents, I will leave him with a film and snacks when I can't be arsed parenting, and I have left him tantrumming in the sweets isle of my local shop while I got what I needed.

Another thing is that I have absolutely no sympathy for parents who are way too particular with the way the do things and get stressed and complain about how hard being a parent is. If you chose to make it more difficult for yourself then that's on you

Really really non controversial stuff on here! Still, a nice opportunity for lots of stealth boasting.

@Napqueen1234 not overly. We have a tv in our room so when he goes down. Normally by 10pm lates we can have a snack in bed whilst watching TV although I'm sure that counts as another sin!

Bribery
iPad
Sometimes both together.

Bribery is working on my 3.5 year old. Got some of the busy books and bribe him with one of the little characters each morning he sleeps until 6am or beyond.
His usual wake up time up until two weeks ago was 4.30.
Totally worth it. Don't care if it's bad parenting.

iPad to keep both DSs quiet while I'm cooking dinner when DH isn't there. Again IMO totally necessary.

I let my eldest walk to and from school from the age of eight.

My parenting is largely bribes and threats.

I might write a book

Everything about my parenting is controversial according to my in laws. Fuck them all.

@alittlelower ah yes I forgot threats. Those too!

I've always had DS1 on 'Italian time' I aim to have him asleep for 9pm (rather than 7), he then wakes up naturally between 7.30-8am. We live next door to the primary he'll be starting in September so there's no rush to get out of the house.

I also let him use real tools etc. with adult supervision a bit younger than most of my mum friends with did with their DC (I used to work as an EYP and also his nursery takes a similar approach so I feel fairly confident in what he can/can't do safely at his age).

Chocolate buttons.

I used to give mine chocolate buttons in the supermarket if they were playing up.

I also used to bribe them not to get up in the night. If they slept through the night, without getting up, they would have 3 choc buttons before breakfast. It was the biggest treat ever.

Letting them sit in front of the telly. With chocolate buttons.

They're surprisingly thin and well adjusted considering!

My daughter, 2, technically doesn’t have a bedtime. At 9pm I tell her it’s time for bed but by the time she falls a sleep it’s gone after 10pm. I can hear her talking and singing to herself in her room, sometimes till very late. I use to stress myself out trying to get her to bed on time. On the bright side she is a late riser so we get a lie in on the weekends

unless they are in the bathroom, i think children should always wear at least lower underwear.

Ouzo I was going to say letting them swear! I think it's important to learn about swearing, what it's for and when it's OK and when not. Because they are going to hear it, and it's better to be honest about what it is. Plus it is good for you to be able to use it to let off steam.

Also, no limit on screen time. It's what they're doing that matters, not whether it's on a screen. So I don't let them have/play any social media or games they're too young for, and I do make them do other things so they can't be on a screen, but I don't make them switch it off if they're just chatting to friends, reading, watching music videos etc.

Jemina I potty trained both mine with chocolate buttons. 1 for a wee 2 for a poo :o

Expose your kids to moderate levels of physical risk/danger. Eg climbing trees or ladders, using hand tools, jumping off walls. That way they learn their limits, and have a lot more fun.

I have rarely stopped my children from doing something potentially dangerous once they are beyond toddler. I sometimes say “are you sure you want to do that?” but I don’t stop them. We briefly used a stair gate but put it three steps up to practice falling. With hand tools I’ve told them I know they’ll be careful, and explained how to use them. They have learnt their own limits pretty well and we haven’t had more than bumps and grazes (yet, I know I’m tempting fate).

(There is some research to back this up but I can’t be bothered tofind it right now.And we don’t have a trampoline, and do wear bike helmets.)

As for tidying up- we don’t bother much and any visitors can just see our true colours.

Tv. All the time. It's not on all day but the PP who said they pop their 4 month old in front of Hey Duggee for an episode or so - I am well beyond that House stays tidy ish and I get to have a shower every day. He plays very well whilst the tv is on but it looks after him while I'm out of the room. I couldn't care any less what anyone thinks about it. I've got a chilled out baby!

I struggle to change my DDs nappy so I put baby shark on my phone and give it to her so that it distracts her enough to let me change her... sometimes it works sometimes it doesn’t! I also have some snacks which I give her to get her in the car seat - if I didn’t do that it would literally take me 20 minutes to get her in! She’s not a badly behaved child she just doesn’t like feeling restricted or staying in one place so is always on the move.

I let my 4 year old use the microwave. Saves me from making porridge for her every morning

@75toothbrushes

Never had any inessential routines of any kind. Eg. no set bedtimes, no naptimes, no set mealtimes. Linked to that, they did lots of things that most children don't do when they were very young. Eg. they were often the only children at the theatre or at a concert. Loads of spur of the moment experiences. Taught both children to read. Took DC2 out of school for up to 2 months at a time to send them to live with families we'd never met in foreign countries to learn their languages, and had their children to live with us. DC speaks 3 foreign languages. Sent DC1 to boarding school from the age of 13, because they were talented and earned themselves a scholarship to a school that could give them loads of opportunities. This involved DC travelling on the train alone for 12 hours to and from school. I could go on...

Oh, please do, we are all enchanted.

@viques,

Jumped the shark there @Jimjammy2010. Why waste your precious diazepam on the kids when a good dose of Piriton would work just as well?