Okay. I'm 26 weeks pregnant. My mother told me today she had ordered me some reusable nappies and I am feeling annoyed because she didnt ask me before hand and I feel like its a decision me and my husband should jointly make. She has also asked for her sister to send her nephews old clothes to me for my baby and when I said no thanks she talked at me on the phone for 5 minutes until I relented
For some context, I have a difficult relationship with my mother. She can be very bossy and controlling and is not really a great communicator. She likes to give lots of advice and does not really make social conversation. I by contrast have anxiety and am quite sensitive. I am battling with feeling petty but at the same time I feel like I have a history of being controlled by her. When I was younger she told me what degree to study, signed me up for summer jobs when I was younger without asking what I wanted, when I wanted to study a tefl she told me to do a pgce (I ended up having a stress related breakdown), when I found a house I wanted to buy with my husband she refused to come in and told me to buy the house her friend was selling that was bigger, when I moved in to my house she advertised a room for a tenant without consulting me, when I told her I was pregnant she told me that I was too over sensitive to be a mother and not strong enough. This is in additon to telling me to drink water and exercise more every time i see her. I feel guilty because she means well but I just can't do it anymore and I don't know what to do.
She loves me a lot I know. But as I said I have anxiety already and I feel overwhelmed by the thought of her. Lockdown has been ironically blissful because it has given me some space from her and my father (who is also rather challenging). I know it must not be easy for her to have a sensitive, neurotic child. I am scared of being a tired first time mother and her wearing me down.
Sorry for the length of this post. Any advice welcome.