What would your reaction be to this conversation?

[mooching]

If you came down in the morning and you spouse said the following:

I've started coughing so I've had to register for a CV test. I'm afraid until I get the results we'll have to self isolate, me for 7 days and you and the kids for 14.

AIBU to ask if your reaction might have included asking how I am, rather than being irritated and saying 'what?' And me having to explain that that is the government's guidelines. He walked off and only about 10-15 minutes later did he ask if I was feeling ok. I pointed out I thought helps reaction was a pretty selfish one.

He says it's my fault for the way I presented it and I think he possibly has a point. I was also aware (and it seems from his reaction that I was right) that he wouldn't know what the self isolation guidelines were. Also, I am ok so perhaps I'm wallowing in self pity?

I would say ‘what? Shall we wait and see how you are over the next day or so first?’ Rather than indulging the rather melodramatic statement from my spouse. If they had been in close contact with coronavirus patients my response may be slightly different.

Eh I don't know. I think it does depend on how it was presented. You can have a slight cough and not be unwell, after all, and if you didn't seem unwell and were just matter of a fact about it then he probably just focused on the other stuff. Did you say/are you feeling unwell? And are you likely to actually have it or is it likely you don't but have to do the test and follow the guidelines anyway? Have is been a few hours or did you wake up, cough a couple of times and panic?

If he's otherwise generally a nice person then I wouldn't be that bothered by this.

Letting someone know they have to self isolate for 14 days is a pretty big deal.

Could he have been a bit shocked about the what isolation involves and was thinking about that first?

He's probably worried about the impact on his/your livelyhoods tbh. I might say what? too in those circumstances, or suggest it could be hayfever. Do you have any particular reason to believe it's Covid ?

If that was the first thing someone said to me in the morning I would be irritated and pissed off too.

I would want coffee and would see you as an overreacting pain in the arse who'd just confined me to the house for two weeks.

Half an hour later and we could have had a proper conversation; I'd have asked how you were and we'd have discussed the guidelines.

I would have been pretty fucked off if my partner had presented it to me like that and not even discussed it with me first.

Honestly, if any of us had symptoms that meant we were all going to have to isolate, my first thought would be around the nightmare of isolation and practicalities. Assuming the person wasn't visibly unwell.

Sounds like he was shocked/worrying about work implications?
He could see you so could see you look relatively fine I assume.

Depends how you said it, to be honest. Probably one of those questions where we had to be there.

But yeah, if you hadn't said anything about feeling rough in any way, and just announced it in the way you've written it here, I dare say (especially if I was needing to go to work) my reaction might be an Aaaaargh one.

WTF you sound v dramatic.

I'd have said oh I don't feel well, I'll register for a test and then discuss isolation.

Do you have a higher risk of catching it? With work for example? It just seems pretty dramatic to come down and start talking like that, especially if worded like you did in your post!

If my husband started off by saying this I’d be ‘wtf’ to be honest, and he’s currently working with the public. From your post it seems you’ve jumped to almost assuming you have it and putting the house on immediate lockdown.

Is it a new dry persistent cough, or is it just a bit of a cough that will clear up once you have had a drink? Are you feeling unwell? Do you have a temperature? Have you been in a situation where you are likely to have caught Covid? The answers to those questions will determine whether he is being unreasonable or you are being a drama queen!

Oh gosh, sorry op, but my reaction wouldn't have been to ask how you are, especially if you looked fine, which it sounds like you do. It would have been ffs, irritation and frustration.

I'd have been really pissed off with my spouse if they had unilaterally done that with no prior discussion.

I wouldn't have reacted well. And I would have expected you to tell me before ordering the test

I'd think you were being dramatic and i'd be pissed off you were telling me I can't leave the house for a fortnight when there's likely to be nothing wrong with you.

I would want coffee and would see you as an overreacting pain in the arse who'd just confined me to the house for two weeks.

Exactly. You are vanishing unlikely to even have corona, let alone become very unwell - he is now 100% on home detention for 2 weeks. Of course he's pissed. 😂

You have a cough. You're hardly confined to your bed with proper flu symptoms.
Calm down. Very dramatic.

Do you have other symptoms? I think "what?" would have been my reaction too, especially if that was the first I'd heard of it.

Did he know you were unwell enough to request a test, had there been discussion about it the previous day? or did you get up this morning, have a bit of a cough, order a test and then tell your dp he now had to isolate until results come through?

I can generally tell if my partner is unwell during normal conversation. I would be majorly hacked off with having to isolate without warning.

If you looked your normal self, and all you said was that you had a cough, unless you were coughing out of your head as you were saying your words, than yes, you were being a drama queen.

I think as a nation we need to be really sensible here. You technically did the responsible thing, making sure you don't spread what is potentially covid-19. But, it must be costing the government (ie us) an absolute fortune to organise tests for everyone who coughs a bit, especially in hay fever season. I think I would have self isolated just as a precaution for a couple of days, see where your cough goes.

You were dramatic and dictatorial. How long have you been coughing for? Either you had it yesterday/last night and he’d have known that or you woke up with it today and are madly overreacting.

Registering for a test and locking your household down first thing in the morning is unnecessarily full on.

Do you suffer from health anxiety?

You're being very dramatic.