Support bubbles aibu to be furious.....

[TriciaH]

So basically an adult living alone or single parent can go into another's house. Great for them if they have been alone for 10 weeks. However two working parents both due back into work, one is a lorry driver but schools now have no space for the children as year groups gone back to school mean no room cannot ask for help with kids. One parent is likely going to have to give up work as we have 3 months before the remote chance the children go back to school which still is only likely to be part time. What the heck are we working parents supposed to do.

Am I unreasonable to think the government need to come up with a plan to help keep us mums in our jobs because let's face it we are going to be the ones at home with the kids giving up our career? This is going to put us on a back foot with employers for years.

You need to make a decision. Break the rules and ask family to step in with childcare or give up your job. These new introductions are not meant to benefit everyone unfortunately.

Agree

We have to follow the rules. Or risk a second wave. There is logic in keeping the risk down, hence one person from one household can mix with one other household because it reduces the risk of the infection travelling to anyone else. If you flout the rules now, and others do too, second wave, second lockdown.

The bubble is about parents who live on their own being allowed to see someone over than their children for mental health reasons. If they let everyone suddenly go out all at once infection rate would go up again. Its basically about small steps. As a single parent myself with disabilities and parents shielding I think this is a great step forward I can now see another adult. This isn't about childcare if you need to go to work and are a key worker you are entitled to childcare. Think people are either very selfish or very ignorant. I have a teenager that basically doesn't talk except when asking for food or is online. It has been a very lonely world Myseld and my daughter already had mental health problems before all this and hard to get any help in the North west. I have many other health problems on top. I cried when this announcement was made I was so happy. I can now go and see my friend who is also a single parent with 2 children with autism. That is what it's about.

Someone locally has put out a call on Facebook to be in their bubble so perhaps you could ask a single parent to 'bubble up' with you?

see both sides and yea yabu

The whole situation is so difficult, I’m back at work , there is zero social distancing, I have customers coming way too close to me , staff aren’t taking the correct precautions either (shaking hands etc) , I must be mixing with 30- 40 different households every day .

I think that the new guidelines are great for lone parents/grandparents as mental health and wellbeing is extremely important.
But this is my scenario...
My sister's DH works away for 6 out of 7 days a week. Sometimes for two to three weeks he's not even home for one day...so no she's not classed as a single parent .. but is parenting on her own 90% of the time ..can she form a bubble with either our parents or PIL? She has lost her job also and.is looking for another but can't attend interview etc due to no child care. Her children are not eligible for school as she is not a.key worker.
Hoping you all stay safe and well

Simple solution: pay your mum a fiver a week to look after your son. Then she's a nanny or childminder, and is allowed to "work" for you. Yes, it's a bit of a technical dodge, but then your situation is bad because of a technicality anyway - your son's EHCP not being filed on time.

Also, contact your local MP and ask them to help you press your local SEND services to implement your son's EHCP as a matter of urgency.

Well, if losing a job is the only option, then arguably this could be seen as (in the words of our great leader Dominic and his sidekick Boris) "Essential Childcare"

@TriciaH if it’s good enough for Dominic Cummings to have his parents babysit (a potentially sick child I may add) I don’t see why you can’t! He even drove 200 odd miles up to where his parents lived! It can’t be one rule for them and another for the masses!

Just do what's best for your family I doubt many people are sticking to the exact letter of the rules at this point.
You could hand in your notice at work and the next day be allowed to bubble with your parents.
Just be sensible and assess your own risk.
Im a single parent, my child is 50 50 with my ex at the moment.
Ive got zero intention of losing my job for childcare reasons no matter what the rules say.

The government did have a plan. Open schools. And then the Labour Party and the media and unions went nuts.

OP I haven’t read the post but I completely agree. I think corona is going to send equality back decades. My DC Is 15m so now he’s able to go to a Childminder’s-I had to withdraw him from nursery to do so. It’s been absolute hell and I was in the pits of depression. I really feel for those of you still trudging on.

If the options are have your parents come to your house to look after your child/drop your SEN son to them OR you get the sack why on Earth are you even having this debate?

Providing you’re not all having garden parties and continuously nipping into other peoples houses/socialising with friends/attending mass gatherings I really cannot see how it will greatly affect your households

The thing is, we all have issues. I'm unemployed and in the middle of selling my flat. Today I went to speak to the manager of the place where I volunteer and that was the first time in three and a half months that I have spoken to another person face to face.

I haven't started threads complaining about it though.

Your own issues don’t make anyone else’s any less valid Crumpet. If you didn’t feel slighted you wouldn’t have felt the need to comment with that little anecdote.

Do what you need to do, just don’t ask Mumsnet for advice

I don't really understand why it's the government's job to fix every problem that arises from the pandemic or maybe I missed the memo?

It's physically impossible to account for everyone's needs and some people will lose jobs, businesses etc.

Is it appalling? Yes.

Is it the reasonable to expect any government to be able to cover ever eventuality ever? No.

Some of you need a reality/entitlement check.

‘The government need to come to with a plan to keep us mums in work’
Wow
The assumption that single parents don’t work.
The fact that single parents have been in isolation, some working, ALONE.....No adult to share the burden, any idea of what that’s like? Doesn’t sound like it.
YABU- why compare the two, why not be pleased that some people may get some help and reprive from this. After all they havnt had any help in months, unlike yourself. You sound very bitter and self involved.

Hugs from an adult for 3 months!! I haven't had a hug for over 20 years from an adult. I'm still here!!

@Noodledoodledoo the problem we have is he should have his ehcp in place by now but he doesn't. School misplaced the educational psychologist report they received in March. It was only picked up when I asked if support would be in place for the start of term in September. When I said I had my report months ago I sent a copy over and school then found the original. It takes 6 weeks for county hall to process so will already have finished this school year. If it had been done in March when they received it I would be able to send him now but as it stands we are still waiting. This is just one of many ways we have been let down on the road to diagnosis. 4 years ago County Hall refused him funding despite reports saying he had a greater need than the child that was given it. His communication skills are 1st percentile so 99 children in 100 can communicate better than him. Which causes the issue at home that everything is on me. Even when dad is home he will not communicate with anyone else for what he wants or needs.

Sorry if I sound a bit rude it's just a crap situation that should not be happening if things that should have been done by professionals months ago were done he would be getting educated. I guess I really need a break but aside from when his asleep he hasn't left my side in months.

@Biilie82 at no point did I say it isn't hard for single parents. I was one for the first 2 years of my eldest child's life. What I meant was mums that work single or otherwise are going to struggle to keep jobs because schools do not have enough spaces and if you cannot leave your child with adequate care you risk loosing your job. This is about women in general being put on a back foot because I reckon at least 90% of the childcare tends to fall on mums. Dad's tend to work longer hours and earn more so financially the family will rely on her. However it puts the careers of women in jeopardy for the next decade as employers will remember this. With all the protests and people going to the beach I just can't see an end. We have no idea when kids will be back in full time education. For an autistic child who needs structure this is creating major issues daily. Hopefully his ehcp is rushed through so I can get him back in school which will be a major battle in itself.

I cba reading the thread because people need to learn common sense. If you have family or friends who can watch the kids, do it! Why would you lose your job over this?

Do what you have to do to get by, just use your common sense, you can make decisions that are best for your family, the alternative seems pointless ( feeling angry and backed into a corner ) do what you need to do to survive basically, your family comes first! I’m a single parent by the way. Good luck.