Support bubbles aibu to be furious.....

[TriciaH]

So basically an adult living alone or single parent can go into another's house. Great for them if they have been alone for 10 weeks. However two working parents both due back into work, one is a lorry driver but schools now have no space for the children as year groups gone back to school mean no room cannot ask for help with kids. One parent is likely going to have to give up work as we have 3 months before the remote chance the children go back to school which still is only likely to be part time. What the heck are we working parents supposed to do.

Am I unreasonable to think the government need to come up with a plan to help keep us mums in our jobs because let's face it we are going to be the ones at home with the kids giving up our career? This is going to put us on a back foot with employers for years.

@PrincessConsuelaVaginaHammock It was considered, there was a huge consultation on it a couple of months back which was widely advertised.

I think in your case OP I'd disregard the "rules" and do what appears to be most sensible. I know you're creating a chain of transmission in theory but if you trust your parents to take the same precautions as you do, you need to work to keep your family healthy.

Welcome to the party, we've both been working full time outside of the house for the most part throughout, no grandparent support, no nursery despite being keyworkers. Plenty of our colleagues are in the same position

Well, I for one am glad that the government is finally starting to realise that people are more than just economic units, and make some decisions that prioritise relational needs over financial ones. It's a difficult balance, working out which tiny step comes next each time, and yes, the bubbles will help some people more than others. This step helps some of those for whom lockdown has had the biggest relational and emotional impact, because they live alone, and I am grateful for that. But return towards normal social interaction does have to be phased gradually and not everyone is going to benefit at each stage. There will be imbalances, there HAVE been imbalances, and the bubble plan corrects one of the biggest imbalances that we've been living with for nearly 3 months.

So, yeah, YABU to be furious.

What's that got to do with people living alone being able to see another family now? My DF hasn't been touched by another human in 3 months, I'm very happy that we're going to be able to spend some time with him.
You need to be on the "Open the schools' thread - that's what you are really upset about isn't it?
I know I am.

OP, and anyone else who wants ANY two households to be allowed to bubble...
I'm sure that rule will come in soon. This will just be to give people who live alone a chance to have some normal social contact, before they are booted out of people's bubbles in a couple of weeks when ALL households can pair up and people choose families/couples to bubble with instead.

H already back at work. I'll be back in July. We'll be creating a "bubble" with grandparents who cared for them prior to this (outside of school hours and summer holidays). We have to work to pay the mortgage and feed us all. Will be as careful as possibly can but there's no other option for us.

We now disregard most things this shower of a govt say and decide ourselves what to do for the best of our family.

Only one parent needs to be a key worker for you to be able to access your school. Your school should take your children.

There is always someone saying it's not fair etc etc, this pandemic has shown who people for how selfish they are .
I think it's great , it won't affect me but I know people that live alone and I know they have really struggled.
Can you imagine not able to spend the night with a partner? No so a bit of empathy wouldn't go amiss .
People seam to think they are the only ones finding this pandemic/ lockdown difficult.

I just think families with two working parents who are not both keyworkers are being forgotten

I honestly think I have read just about every group on here now, claiming they are the "forgotten" group. I think the reality is that not everything can be done at once and some things are safer than others.

I am a single parent and this weekend my son can finally see his grandparents and be in their house and hug and play. That’s wonderful for him but I feel horribly rotten for my nieces that cannot do that because my DSis and her husband are still together. I understand and appreciate the rationale and sentiment behind the decision but it makes me a bit sad for all of the children who can’t see grandparents.

With regards to the school placement I would contact them again. They may change their decision. As time has gone on and things have settled more and more children from parents of key workers are able to go. Worth a conversation.

I haven't read all six pages of this thread but I think this is where common sense must come in to play. If nannies and cleaners are allowed in your home and children are allowed to go between separated parents, then if you are confident in your parents safety then I'd have them mind the kids if they are willing.

Also wanted to say I really dislike the way that people who are finding things difficult for a whole host of reasons are being criticised.

Nobody is saying they're the only ones finding things hard but it doesn't mean they're not finding things hard and should not be criticised for it.

Some people need to be more sympathetic and supportive. I don't get the mentality whereby somebody comes on here for support/ to sound off and they get a totally unfair mouthful.

If Dominic Cummings can get way with what he and his wife did (whilst they had or had been exposed to Covid-19 plus lying about it, then, in your circumstances I would bubble up with your parents.

Would your mum come to your house for the couple of overlap hours each day ?

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Today 06:27rainbowscalling

@StealthPolarBear all of the news reports actually say that a LP or single household person can mix with 1 other household regardless of who's living there. Doesn't have to be 2 single households."
That isn't what Boris said, he explicitly said" of the same type"
Plus he hasn't said households with two adults can mix! If you look at it from the other perspective it is forbidden.

@pipandmum
There is a whole host of guidance to follow regarding making your home safe if you employ a nanny, with requirements relating to social distancing by adults, cleaning, food preparation and ventilation, amongst others. In an attempt to mitigate the risk of having another adult in your home.

I seriously question whether this is being followed by all those asking grandparents to carry out childcare in the home.

I am no fan of the government's handling of this but am really concerned at how few people seem to be following rules in this, it's not surprising our infection figures are still so high.

I have sympathies for OP, though, and feel school should be stepping up - leaving aside key worker provision, you clearly have a child who needs the support.

The new rules are specifically for adults living alone. They admittedly don’t help two parent families- I wrote to my mp the other day about exactly this. Preschool aged kids can go to nursery now but unless they can go to school school aged kids have NO options available. If you qualify for a worker place though your LA should be able to help if not your school.

Ps I know several families who are leaving kids with grandparents etc simply because their schools won’t have them and they have no other choice.

www.education-ni.gov.uk/news/information-schools-open-vulnerable-children-and-key-workers-children

This confirms only ONE parent needs to be a key worker to access school childcare

I think you just need to do what works for you. Our economy is devastated, our R remains high, and the governments have no plan. Why bother following the rules they don't follow themselves?

It is clear neither Westminster or any of the devolved governments give a damn about working parents. None of them are even talking about the impact on parents. Wales is sending kids back to school, but just a tiny bit, which will make life harder, not easier for working parents. The R remains high.

We have hired a "nanny" and that is legal. In fact, we have two "nannies" in Wales, where bubbles aren't even allowed. This is totally legal. Pay your parents a small amount and call them a "nanny" if you feel you need to be inside the law. The government gives no fucks if you follow the rules or not, the only people who care are the bored and angry curtain twitchers.

The government has stated very very clearly that for childcare purposes you may trust your own instincts and do what you believe to be the right thing for your family.

If your parents are willing to look after your child, let them.

If you want to really stick within the letter of the rules, ask your parents to come to you, and pay them to look after your child. They are allowed to enter someone’s home to work.

We are in a similar situation to you OP. Of course it is hard, but I do think single parents are having a particularly difficult time.

For all those criticising I never once said single parents don't need support. Two parent families also need support especially if a child has special needs. What about the mental health of my other child who has had to deal with his sibling constantly attacking him, threatening him he needs a break from it as much as anyone. This isn't just life during lock down but everyday for the past 8 years. Normally he would go to his grand parents for a night or two but he hasn't been able to since Christmas for one reason or another.

To those arguing about key worker provision, most schools have basically closed up shop on this meaning if you didn't immediately at the start of lockdown request a place they won't give them now even if one or both of you are key workers. If you send in government rules about it they ignore. There isn't some sort of arbiter you can go to about this to plead your case. It's all in the school's control and each school will take different decisions.

@nostaples

Also wanted to say I really dislike the way that people who are finding things difficult for a whole host of reasons are being criticised.

Nobody is saying they're the only ones finding things hard but it doesn't mean they're not finding things hard and should not be criticised for it.

Some people need to be more sympathetic and supportive. I don't get the mentality whereby somebody comes on here for support/ to sound off and they get a totally unfair mouthful.

Totally agree. Apparently no one is allowed to find things difficult cos other people are or - gasp - might have it harder.