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Original poster

A greedy bastard breakfast

261 replies

SquishyBones · 09/06/2020 20:34

I was speaking to an old friend this morning who laughed and asked if I still had greedy bastard breakfasts. I asked what he was on about and he started going on about what I used to eat really laughing and banging on and exagurating saying I used to eat a couple of boxes of cereal and 2 loaves of bread etc.

What I actually had was a bowl of cereal, toast, a yogurt and a banana. This is what he called a greedy bastard breakfast. I feel like he’s been taking the piss out of me for years for this but never had the balls to bring it up with me.

OP posts:
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6
lyralalala · 10/06/2020 00:01

The competitive horror on here when people mention food is hilarious.

I eat a similar size breakfast to the OP and have lost 8 stones in the last couple of years. I get massively amused when people comment on my ridiculous breakfast, especially when they have a decent size breakfast and then spend the entire day snacking. I have a a big breakfast, a big lunch and a small dinner. It’s made the biggest difference to my weight, more than any diet has

PyongyangKipperbang · 10/06/2020 00:03

@Raella50 I feel really bad, but as you say, as long as you enjoy it. I think it may be to do with being forced to finish my dinner as a kid and I always had to choke down cold corguette!

Raella50 · 10/06/2020 00:08

@PyongyangKipperbang I like the texture mixed with the egg yoke. Grated carrot is also nice. If it’s the weekend and I have more time, I like to cut the courgette into thick slices and fry it with eggs insyead. Delicious!

Disquieted1 · 10/06/2020 00:21

I'm OK during the week, but on Saturdays I have a huge pile of bacon and eggs. However I always liquidise it and take it via enema. Admittedly the bacon doesn't taste as good.

WhenAllsSaidandDone · 10/06/2020 00:24

Cereal, toast, fruits and yoghurt a big breakfast? Surely that's what you pick your teeth with after you've had the actual GBB (Greedy bastard breakfast).

Loving that phrase btw and will be using it from now on.

To your OP, I'd either find his exaggeration hilarious or offensive depending on the kind of relationship I have (jokey or not) and how it was said. Intention matters.

WhenAllsSaidandDone · 10/06/2020 00:25

Oh and gotten from another poster, this is what I'd call a GBB. Lush!

A greedy bastard breakfast
GlendaSugarbeanIsJudgingYou · 10/06/2020 00:26

Courgette done right is amazing.

I discovered this after having ribbons of it on a pizza with black forest ham in Berlin.

You need to explore the wonderful world of courgettes, PyongyangKipperbang. :o

iwilltaketwoplease · 10/06/2020 00:31

Sounds like a lot but I was expecting to read "2 sausage, 2bacon, eggs, toast, mushrooms and so on" Grin

I couldn't eat 2cereals, yogurt, banana and toast but I sure could eat a monster full English!

Lollypop4 · 10/06/2020 00:32

I have cereal, fruit and yogurt too..
I also enjoy a fry up / Bacon sandwich or egg on toast...
My children have cereal(Usually Wetabix or porridge), fruit and yogurt daily...Ages 2-17..
Your friend is very rude, tell him to jog on!

Lollypop4 · 10/06/2020 00:33

*The latter of my breakfast choices are maybe twice a week, not daily!

StrangeLookingParasite · 10/06/2020 01:06

@Disquieted1

I'm OK during the week, but on Saturdays I have a huge pile of bacon and eggs. However I always liquidise it and take it via enema. Admittedly the bacon doesn't taste as good.
You are appalling.

Grin Grin Grin

PyongyangKipperbang · 10/06/2020 01:41

@GlendaSugarbeanIsJudgingYou

Bugger off, you might have freed a crab and be the creator of the ploughmans pie but courgettes will always be the work of the devil! :o

GlendaSugarbeanIsJudgingYou · 10/06/2020 04:13

Nutt loves a nice courgette pie.

GnomeDePlume · 10/06/2020 05:09

Years ago I used to regularly go to Belfast to do stock counting. The treat for me would be having an Ulster fry:

Bacon, eggs, sausages, black pudding, both potato bread and soda bread, baked beans, fried tomato, mushrooms, and white pudding.

Put that away a pint of tea and I would be good for a whole day in a freezing cold warehouse.

Surely what makes a good breakfast depends on what comes after? A day spent sitting around snacking vs a day of manual labour.

drspouse · 10/06/2020 05:20

Oh why did I click on this at 5 am when I woke up a bit hungry?

Bluntness100 · 10/06/2020 06:19

I think the insinuation from the friend is that the op has large portions, hence the exaggerated two boxes of cereal And two loaves of bread thing, clearly she doesn’t eat that much but he was ripping the piss and exaggerating it.

So it was less what she ate, but how much of it, that’s why he was calling it a greedy bastard breakfast. She’s not commented on how much of it she ate, simply what she ate.

No one can say if she is eating healthily or if it’s not perceived as a lot because they have no idea If she has toddler portions as some folks are oddly suggesting, or a massive bowl of cereal and lots of toast. Either way it doesn’t matter he clearly shouldn’t have commented as she’s hurt by it, and it’s hit a sore spot.

Irishprincess · 10/06/2020 07:26

I thought breakfast was meant to be the biggest meal of the day. That to me isn't big. Why would it matter if you saved the fruit and yogurt for lunch or as a snack anyway. I'd have a cooked breakfast everyday if I could and I'm slim. He sounds like a CF

Irishprincess · 10/06/2020 07:35

My old manager was about 31 stone and had issues with food, he always commented on what I ate as I do eat a lot but it's all healthy so I don't see the issue. I found it embarrassing that he talked about it so much but it was obviously because he had hang ups about food so I just laughed it off

understandmenow · 10/06/2020 08:01

I don’t know many people who could eat all that in one sitting for the first meal of the day.
If you don’t eat lunch that’s fine but, for people who would also have lunch and dinner, that would be excessive.

Says who? FFS, how do you know what OP eats for lunch or dinner, it could be light but she certainly doesn't need to miss meals. What stupid advice!

ReturnofSaturn · 10/06/2020 08:13

Sorry this made me laugh OP Grin.

It does sound a lot but I wouldn't call is greedy bastard territory. Presumably you then didn't need to eat much for lunch or something.

Euclid · 10/06/2020 08:15

Regardless of how much you eat for breakfast, his description of it is foul mouthed.

midnightstar66 · 10/06/2020 08:17

Not sure how that's a big breakfast. Dc have that every day and they are only 7 and 10. If I'm going to be active between breakfast and lunch I'd need at least that. Just seems like a normal breakfast to me

burnoutbabe · 10/06/2020 08:19

It seems more like a hotel breakfast. I'd have all the different bits if in a b&b or hotel with buffet to get my monies worth. Maybe with cooked stuff as well!
Hone, just one of those items.

midnightstar66 · 10/06/2020 08:30

In a hotel I'd have that, a pastry then a full English.

midnightstar66 · 10/06/2020 08:33

I’d have cereal, toast or yoghurt with fruit alone; but at the same time I don’t think that’s a lot of food for breakfast. The cereal could be served with yogurt & fruit instead of milk. It is a bit weird though, like did you eat the cereal or the toast first??

This thread is hilarious with posters frantically trying to combine the food and questioning what order you ate it 😆. And what on. Earth difference does it make if the banana is chopped in to the cereal or eaten separately