You're white you cannot experience racism 3

[PatricksRum]

And it continues. Thank you for those black people who took the time to share their stories once again.

@Whataloadofshite @BeforeIPutOnMyMakeup @CandyLeBonBon @WokeUpSmeltTheCoffee
Thank you all.

I would like to explain why I am uncomfortable with " use your white privelege / check your privelege" I'm not telling you that you can't say it, I'm just explaining why I personally find it unhelpful.

I want to. But I honestly don't know how I can use my white privelege to solve anything. I know that I can challenge racist opinions and statements that might be said in my presence but not in the presence of a black person. But beyond that? Is there anything I can do?

@Dreep The reason why I won't answer. is because you wouldn't respect my decision to not engage with you at that moment. You kept probing for an answer.

I'm going to tell you how the thre add and the concept of white privilege helped me:

I used to think that I should not speak about racism because it is not my struggle and maybe I'll offend people or be accused of being a white saviour or cultural appropriation (and maybe I will. I still am not sure)

The thread and OP specifically have me permission to see that speaking up can be using my white privilege in the struggle

When I go back to work I am going to organise an education session on violence against black people in mental health settings. I was afraid to do it before but now I see that the black people I work with can't do this as they lack the power. There is only 1 black consultant and he is a locum so afraid to lose his job. I can organise and invite them to speak.

Because when they did on the ops other thread she repeatedly told them to go away and ordered others not to engage with them.
I asked people not to engage with you because you repeatedly purposefully refuse to listen blindingly obvious points and here you are again.

@PatricksRum

How can 'us', 'our', 'we' not refer to more than one person? Therefore you are not speaking for yourself.

You are giving your views on behalf of a community as a whole.

That's fine. But you don't say that's what you are doing, and you've utterly rejected another poster's views (Dreep) who is black and tried to say how she feels, what she suggests.

You've told her she should leave your threads.

You've repeatedly dismissed her points without engaging.

People on this thread who stand by and support this are disgraceful.

Thank you woke

I can’t speak for the people who have supported my posts but I didn’t understand it to be ‘quiet (er) black people good, louder ones bad’.

I hope they were just picking out that it was unfair that I was silenced because I wasn’t rude or unnecessary. And that it was wrong whether I am black or white.

I hope they were as annoyed as I was that I was continually asked to leave by the Op - I don’t know about anyone else wanting me to go - and that the OP was telling people not to engage with me. That was unjust.

The OP doesn’t want to answer the question that I keep asking - as is her right.

But genuinely - I don’t think posters were vilifying the OP - just some actions and posts.

For the record, I don’t think there is anyone - on any of these threads - that is against. BLM.

We can get it wrong or not understand sometimes but as long as we get that and move along, trying to do right, then we can go forward to a better world. Hopefully.

How can 'us', 'our', 'we' not refer to more than one person? Therefore you are not speaking for yourself.
I think you're being purposefully obtuse.
If I say we(women) weren't allowed to vote that is me stating a fact about a group of people, that doesn't make me the chair of the group.

@qweryuiop yes, and I say this with the utmost respect - you and others who feel the way you do can choose to ignore the things you find offensive about these types of threads, and highlight and reiterate the points that are being made in support of the thread. There are many instances in life where black people ignore racism towards them to keep the peace and many are hoping that can be done in return when it is necessary. If you find the points are awkwardly worded because the writer was angry, you can reword it to make it count. You can choose to ignore the less frequent occasions where white people are 'targeted' and instead give further validity to the important points that are being made. That would mean so much. Not just on threads, but in real life. Because the people constantly picking these things apart are making it nigh on impossible to get anything meaningful across.

The person in question (Dreep) is black. My whole post was about your treatment of her

Your reply therefore makes no sense.

You are either wilfully misunderstanding me or trying to cause more offence.

Lord. I'm not speaking about her clearly.
I've said a white person's experience isn't necessary. She isn't white so I'm clearly not referring to her.

Well, this casual use of 'you' directly after you quite Dreep's posts makes thus very hard to understand.

Your posting style is utterly confusing.

(But I don't really accept your weak explanation. You, IMO, are all about causing hurt & creating dissent here).

(But I don't really accept your weak explanation. You, IMO, are all about causing hurt & creating dissent here).*
Nope. White racist people caused my hurt.
My hurt was deepened when another one of us was murdered by them.
I'm expressing my hurt.

• @Dreep The reason why I won't answer. is because you wouldn't respect my decision to not engage with you at that moment. You kept probing for an answer.*

Whaaat? OP?

You won't answer Dreep because she asked you for an answer - wtf?

You didn't answer her, I feel, because she is articulate, clear & respectful and you'd no way to respond as you've been none of those things here.

@PatricksRum Yes and no one has said you can't, I just struggled to understand why you are somewhat disagreeing with someone who is experiencing the same thing as you, but as you've said you just simply feel differently on the matter.

Well yes there's a huge divide especially now, and it was someone who works for the government that killed George Floyd, it's not us against you, it's all of us against them, the racists , Trump like you've just said, the high powered people who are doing this, caused this and continuing it. So I see that's where white privilege comes in, we need to fight with you to stop them? Because there are far more of us than there is them and we have the power to stop it. I'm understanding.

These threads are a real mess. A real mess. Not a politely curated training session or an echo chamber.

I’ve been angry and frustrated at times with some of the things expressed. Today I feel every post has taught me something about racism and struggle and how hard it is to listen and understand.

As a wise person may have said “Whoever has ears to hear, let them hear."

I asked people not to engage with you

You don't get to instruct / ask / tell anyone not to engage with anyone else.

That's each poster's own prerogative

@worzelsnurzel123

The more we hear from OP the more I question her motives. She doesn’t want a peaceful solution where we can end this together or unite. Her words “ Been there, done that” in response to my hope that we can work as a team show that. This Thread has been created to stir up more racial tensions and hatred towards white people. She makes constant excuses of being so tired etc but if this is “ your time” to stand up you should do it properly. Take the chance and make a great job of it . Some of the other posters seem to have done this far better than her. There are some really eloquent, clear and informative posters on here who have been really amazing in putting across their views. From them I have learned and I thank them.

I completely agree.

I was wondering about motives yesterday.

*Whaaat? OP?

You won't answer Dreep because she asked you for an answer - wtf?*
Nope. I refuse to answer because I told her I am not engaging and she kept probing me.
It's my right to answer or not answer and that right wasn't respected.*

You didn't answer her, I feel, because she is articulate, clear & respectful and you'd no way to respond as you've been none of those things here.*
You are welcome to feel how you like, it doesn't make it true.

OP - I kept probing because I thought that comment was sly and insinuating that I could be something or someone I cannot be.

The fact you chose not to just reinforces that my fears could be correct.

It is your right to stay silent but not to silence me. Which you did. And you said I was inflammatory and I genuinely don’t think I was.

I feel you took a huge exception to me for no reason other than my opinions or stance was different.

I did not ask for you to be silenced when I disagreed with what you posted.

I don’t know if you realise how hateful and unfair I found your actions to be. But to me they really were.

I hope that clears up why I kept pushing.

Yes and no one has said you can't, I just struggled to understand why you are somewhat disagreeing with someone who is experiencing the same thing as you, but as you've said you just simply feel differently on the matter.
Just because two people have felt grief it doesn't mean they will agree or respond or seal with it in the same way.
Pp mentioned MLK & Malcolm X, same end goal, different approaches. No one is wrong or right in their approach.
*
Well yes there's a huge divide especially now, and it was someone who works for the government that killed George Floyd, it's not us against you, it's all of us against them, the racists , Trump like you've just said, the high powered people who are doing this, caused this and continuing it. So I see that's where white privilege comes in, we need to fight with you to stop them? Because there are far more of us than there is them and we have the power to stop it. I'm understanding.*
OK the difficulty with all of us vs them. It's not white people that are oppressed and it's not all white people that aren't racist. Some of you are, evidently. Which is why it's our fight. We ask you to stand with us and help us but ultimately, it is our fight as the oppressed if that makes sense?

I told her I am not engaging

The point is why?

You want discussion on this thread, surely? Dreep, another black woman, tried to contribute and disagreed with your approach.

You were bullying and nasty towards her, wanted her to leave the thread, and others not to engage with her.

How is that right

How can you not see she is at least owed an apology from you, not continual attacks?

@iwilltaketwoplease
Just to clarify, I can't collectively say white people are against racism because a majority aren't.

@wokeupsmeltthecoffee that's fantastic and all of the people posting here have been part of making this positive step. I hope that it goes well. A bit of a xpost with my question, though in my case my boss is an incredible black woman, so I definitely feel she is in an even better position to effect change in my workplace. But yes, in places where powerful black voices aren't being heard, white allies must speak for them.

@AMemeByAnyOtherName I do understand that,as far as I can. I think all white people who truly want to be allies choose their words so carefully to avoid causing offence, and respect that people experiencing racism won't always choose their words carefully, because they are very rightly angry.

@PatricksRum
I do think it's strange to have a title that you yourself have said that you don't agree with and that encourages posters to post things that distract from the issue at hand, but I respect your right to make that decision. If this thread is helping you or other people, then it's important.

You don't get to instruct / ask / tell anyone not to engage with anyone else.
Yes I do. Anyone, anywhere can ask something.*

That's each poster's own prerogative*
Of course which is why I asked and didn't demand.

@dreep

I feel you took a huge exception to me for no reason other than my opinions or stance was different.

I did not ask for you to be silenced when I disagreed with what you posted.

I don’t know if you realise how hateful and unfair I found your actions to be. But to me they really were.

I hope that clears up why I kept pushing.

So well-written & dignified Dreep.

I'm so sorry about what has happened.

I 💯 agree OP's actions have been hateful.

@Dreep
I can totally understand why you kept probing but in the same sentence it is my right as we've said.

I saw your posts in relation to deletion of the posts and banning of my account which is why I said earlier that perhaps I got your motives wrong.

@EarringsandLipstick I've explained why as much as I am going to. I don't need to explain myself.