[quote namechangegarden]**@EarringsandLipstick* I can understand why @PatricksRum* posts with using shortcuts sometimes, without fully explaining. She is tired (apologies for speaking for you OP), and quite frankly so am I.
It is exhausting as a black person living in the West to continually have to explain the prejudice, racism and microaggressions we encounter simply because of our skin colour.
Nobody would ask a victim of domestic abuse to continually revisit her experiences so we can help her DP/DH not to inflict that on her again. It's traumatic, and a lot of Black people bury it because the emotional damage it does to the individual is immense. I know I personally haven't fully processed every instance of racism I have ever encountered, as if I did, I'd probably spend a year crying, then have a complete breakdown.
Isn't it enough to acknowledge that we have suffered, and continue to suffer, and ask that people treat us as people equal to them?[/quote]
I can't speak for everyone but my reasons for posting on these threads was to try and understand what I need to do, as a white person, in light of what is happening now.
I have always been, I believe, against racism. I call it out and challenge it wherever I see it.
I was in a three year relationship with an Asian man and I witnessed a different perspective then to what I witness as a white person and I hope that it's made me more aware of the insidious nature of racism.
But right now we are being asked to act in a different way and that's where I am having difficulty clarifying in my own mind what I need to do.
An example. Last Monday I was seeing lots of social media posts requesting that we all refrain from posting on our SM on Tuesday other than posting a black square as a way of expressing our support for the BLM movement.
Many people, in good faith and with good intention did this because we wanted to show support, show that we stand with you.
Then came the backlash - we shouldn't have done it, it was "white saviour" mentality, we prevented black people from seeing information because the hashtag used affected searches, we should have posted details, not black squares.
Now, I'm not complaining about my hurt feelings. All I'm saying is so many of us want to support, to be an ally but we aren't quite sure what is the right thing to do.
In your example of DV, we can listen to those accounts, we can sign post to services, we don't need endless detail because we aren't being required to take direct action. If DV became a worldwide movement and we were being told that it was our duty to end DV, to directly involve ourselves if we witnessed any sign of DV then yes, I would be trying to find out how, what's the safest way to help, what do victims need in those moments etc. Eg I read the other day that if you witness a man being verbally aggressive to his partner you shouldn't challenge him, you should attempt to quietly offer help to the woman. That's something I didn't know, have never read about and probably if I ever saw it my instinct would have been to call the man out. Now I know different.
That's what I was hoping for on these threads.