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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I feel my husband is making us fools

280 replies

Wouldyoudoit2 · 05/06/2020 13:59

We engaged a company with good reviews to move our hot tub from one property to another. The distance is approx 100 miles.

We were quoted £600. Having had a hot tub moved in the past, this was the maximum I wanted to pay for this distance but asked if this was inclusive of VAT. We were told it was, all good.

The agreement was to meet (socially distanced) at one property at 9am for load and then the company had another job to do somewhere on the way, so the plan was to message or call and give a guide as to when they would be arriving at the other end and we would get there to ensure access is available for drop off.

My husband goes to the property as planned at 9am. The company did not arrive until nearer 10am.
I get a message from my husband to say it has been loaded on to the truck and that they will be taking it back to theirs (not sure if it’s a lock up or home) and bringing it to destination property on Monday.
They will wash it over the weekend and do the service on Monday at the house.

I’m fuming!
Here is my side: I feel that my husband has just allowed a company to drive away with our property and they could do anything over the weekend such as create jobs/repairs that they will come across when servicing it on Monday.
He has allowed this as the guy is running late (not my problem he has been more than one job for the day in the diary and arrived late) and it will make it easier on everyone.
The guy has offered no discount for moving the goal posts. I am quite happy to wash my own hot tub over the weekend and can accept he may run later but want my hot tub to be delivered on the same day as planned.
I then find out he is not charging VAT. I didn’t want a cash job, again this guy is manipulating the situation to suit his agenda at no cost to him.

This is just not what was agreed and I’m not happy.

My husband thinks I’m too cynical and need to trust people.
I think he is being foolish.
Who do you think is BU?
I’m also annoyed that he did not call to discuss whether I agreed with this change.

(The hot tub cost £15k when new. Please don’t take that wrong, it is just factual information as to what they have in their care over the weekend).

OP posts:
MyEyesightIsBadLetsGoForADrive · 06/06/2020 18:47

Why the fuck are people being so needlessly rude? It's as through they are reading a different thread (apart from posters who admit they haven't even read the fucking thread but are still eager to give their opinion on OP's shortcomings Hmm)

OP I hope you get your hot tub back in one piece and no has had sex in it Wink

poopoopoo · 06/06/2020 18:48

Could they be using it somewhere over the weekend? That would p me off a bit, then you wouldn’t no as they have cleaned it! (But I am the suspiciousness type. I would be upset if they were supposed to drop it off on they day, they should drop it off!

emmskie03 · 06/06/2020 18:49

I'm surprised at the nu.ber of people who apparently wouldn't bat an eyelid at someone deciding that rather than pick and and deliver on the same day, they have decided to redeliver a £15,000 item a couple of days later when you have no idea where they are storing it etc.

I wouldn't be very pleased myself.

Toomuchtrouble4me · 06/06/2020 18:49

sorry - don't care

poopoopoo · 06/06/2020 18:50

Sorry spelling error *know, not no

BestestBrownies · 06/06/2020 18:51

Fucking hell! I can’t believe the open hostility and barefaced jealousy on display here.

Replace £15K hot tub with £15K car and the responses would be very different.

I too would be furious with DP if he (a) made such an ill-thought-out decision and (b) did so without consulting me. That makes me sensible and protective of my property, not controlling or paranoid or any of the other pathetic insults that have been thrown the OP’s way.

poopoopoo · 06/06/2020 18:51

Wish I had a hot tub, they can drop it at mine!

Whitepriv · 06/06/2020 18:51

Just saying, but couldn’t you have dealt with it if you have an issue with how your DH handled it?

poopoopoo · 06/06/2020 18:52

Hope it’s all good, best not to worry. People are more important xx

DeeCeeCherry · 06/06/2020 18:55

You paid for a job, with terms agreed, and that's what should have been stuck to. Are they insured to hold/store clients' property over the weekend? Hope they don't use it/break it. Yes I would see this as dubious and in your H's shoes I'd not have agreed to it. The cleaning of tub seems to be an unasked for add-on. Make sure you're not charged for that.

ComputerIsLoading · 06/06/2020 18:57

@Wouldyoudoit2

frazzledasarock it was agreed that pick up and drop off would be the same day.

We discussed with each other what we wanted, then discussed with the company. They agreed and now it isn’t happening. I have no idea where it is, how it is being stored etc.

If something happened, would my insurance cover it? Unlikely. It would be down to theirs. Would their insurance cover it if it’s at a residential property? I have no idea but these are the things I think about because in the event of a problem occurring. I would be asked, why did you not ask? It is practical due diligence to me.

Right now my property has been collected and I have no idea where it is and told I will get it on Monday.

It’s seems you all disagree with me to feel concerned and annoyed my husband blindly agreed without even a discussion with me. I feel this is something I would have a quick 5 minute call with him to check how he felt about the new arrangement.
Some feel that is controlling.

We buy things 50/50 and make decisions together.

Totally feel the OPs anxiousness, some random guy in a transit has picked up her hot tub and driven off on to the sunset! Changing goal posts loosely and at last minute does not install confidence or professionalism, you pay for a service on agreed terms and you should receive it!
fascinated · 06/06/2020 19:02

That’s it! People are jealous! Hadn’t occurred to me.

IloveTed · 06/06/2020 19:05

You are not being unreasonable in the slightest. A job was agreed and they have shifted the goal posts. £600 to move a hot tub is not cheap - the new terms should not have been agreed and the company should have offered some form of discount for the inconvenience.

Insanelysilver · 06/06/2020 19:36

I’d be pissed off too. I was looking at hiring one for my daughters birthday but it was too expensive.
He may well be using it himself or hiring it
Why can’t he take it straight to the property as you’d agreed? What was his excuse for not doing so?
It’s a cheek. You can’t arrange to a move and then just bugger off with someones stuff !

LewScroose · 06/06/2020 19:40

Nope sorry I would be fuming and anxious, that’s a lot of money and not what was agreed

Amibannedorwhat · 06/06/2020 19:43

Lol @Wecandorhis99

Amibannedorwhat · 06/06/2020 19:44

But, I’d be concerned too.

Billben · 06/06/2020 19:47

Blimey, I don’t think I’d be able to sleep a wink until Monday. Your DH is a fool for agreeing to this. Hope pictures were taken of the hot tub before being loaded up onto the truck.

erniepigy · 06/06/2020 19:50

If the delivery vehicle broke down or was involved in a collision you wouldn’t have had delivery the same day.
Why are you so concerned about where it is stored, it’s not like it’s a bike propped up against his garden wall. Clearly, if he’s going to give it a clean too, I would assume it has to be somewhere that can be done so I feel you are overthinking it.
In business things happen, I used Pickford to move house along with the packing service, thinking I was paying for the best. They damaged a silver antique, lost a box of irreplaceable glassware and gave me a rug that wasn’t mine! Nothing is guaranteed in life. Relax and deal with problems as they happen, not before.

Ratbum · 06/06/2020 19:53

I've just finished watching Kate Garraway discussing her husband's condition and how this virus may yet destroy their family.

Chill. In your hot tub perhaps, when the company deliver it after the weekend.

Euclid · 06/06/2020 19:59

Ratburn surely you don't chill in a hot tub!

NoMoreFlowers · 06/06/2020 20:02

Just calm down

Flittingabout · 06/06/2020 20:07

I think you are entirely right to be annoyed.

This could be stored in an uninsured garage somewhere, or used and broken over the weekend by someone else, it could even be hired out and you wouldn't get any insurance back presumably, as you (DH) let them take it away.

Regardless of it being a hot tub, if I paid for ANYTHING of sentimental or financial value to be picked up and dropped off same day I'd be fuming about this.

Baxterbear · 06/06/2020 20:22

A definite first world problem........

MadameMeursault · 06/06/2020 20:39

@Greedypeopleithink

Hi,

I just wanted to put a scenario before you and see what your opinions are on this. If anyone has any personal / legal experience
, please take some time to share your opinions.

Husband and wife with 2 year old. Hisband has anger issues and has been physically violent to wife on one occasion in the presence of LO. He is continuously aggressive shouting at any slight disagreement to the point where wife no longer responds in a way which would anger him and if she does, she knows she risks an aggressive outburst. Always on egg shells.

Wife- attempted suicide whilst pregnant due to on going emotional abuse with husband. Has history of cutting herself as a teenager but this was over 15 years ago.

Husband and Wife at loggerheads. If a split was on the cards, who would get custody? What about visitation?

Thank you for reading.

@Greedypeopleithink you’ve accidentally posted this as a comment on someone else’s thread. You need to start a thread of your own if you want people to reply to you. Flowers for you, sounds like an awful situation.