You're white you haven't experienced racism 2 *title amended by MNHQ at OP's request*

[PatricksRum]

I started a thread in the early hours.

I fell asleep
I've checked the thread and it's full.

Whilst the thread sadly proves my OP, there were a lot of great posts and understanding by some MNers.

I think this discussion is so important and I'd like to continue.

These photos sum up the ridiculous responses.

Do not tell me I am doing my oppressed race a disservice
Your racial prejudice faced as a white person do not trump the daily racism and fear for our lives

Finally, if your response to this is to explain your tiny grievances of racial prejudices you've faced then you are wholly part of the problem.

The racist behaviours and thoughts by your people is the problem. It is your duty to understand and tackle it. I repeat, it is not the duty of black people to educate you.

I understood your metaphor perfectly well, PatricksRum. I think hooves is being deliberately obtuse and is acting in bad faith.

So in the race analogy

Police are disproportionately violent to black men

What needs to change to stop this?
Telling the police to stop being racist is like telling my boss to stop expecting me to be organised - it’s not going to happen. We’re all angry.

I don’t know what the issue is and so what should be campaigned for to stop it.....
Do we need to

1. Train the police different

2.fire them all and start again

1. Reduce crime in predominantly black areas so less people are arrested in the first place

Or something else.

I live in a rural white middle class bubble - I can not comprehend the issues faced by young black men in cities....I am still horrified by the pictures the news, it’s awful that some humans treat other humans this way. But I have no idea why or how to stop it.

@MadgeMak

I understood your metaphor perfectly well, PatricksRum. I think hooves is being deliberately obtuse and is acting in bad faith.

I'm sorry. I am not being obtuse. I did not understand. I have a condition that causes cognitive impairment.

I can't read and understand lots of information. I shouldn't have to explain my medical history to strangers on a forum.

I've already said several times over that I didn't understand and that I have a cognitive impairment.

Before someone says - but you said the place you work is majority not white so how do you live in a white bubble - I Don’t work where I live, and I don’t seem to see racism where I work - I’ve spoken to my colleagues (and husband) and they don’t feel there is any

But no one has heard or listened to that zebra

I heard you. I know you are trying.

@Dreep

But no one has heard or listened to that zebra

I heard you. I know you are trying.

Thank you.

@Nonotthatdr
All 3

An injection of funds into services that benefit black people
This will lead to a reduction of crime by black people
Thus reduction of arrests etc.

A no tolerance approach towards racism

Yes daisy you become the horrible person who is telling them the very uncomfortable truth and they will twist and fight and whatabout the whole way. It is so unfair for the person personally affected by racism to subsequently then be mentally drained in this way on top of everything and not believed. I see why you have to say NAWP cos WP just can’t take it and act dreadfully and require you to walk on eggshells.

Since reading DiAngelo I got involved in some conversations at work and elsewhere about racism - DH and my boss were open minded but several white male colleagues behaved just like a caught fish; thrashing around violently everywhere, metaphorically speaking.

If I wasn’t white I would not have dared broach the topic as the consequences would be too bad - I think you would risk ostracism.

I think the people disapproving of protests “due to Covid” is a red herring.

As a white mother of two black sons part of this thread makes me want to weep. Why can’t you listen, open your hearts and heads to what is going on and stand united?! It.is.not.about.you
The first time my child was accused of having “a chip on his shoulder” he was two. A toddler in nappies. I wrote a thread about it at the time. About 5 years ago now. His adhd traits are being ignored and we are instead asked if we have “boundaries” at home (we do). When I asked about a screening for dyslexia for him I was told the best thing to do was to “encourage dad to read with his son”. FYI, my husband who is a lawyer can read. The list goes on and on and on. He is 8 and already knows that if he is cheeky at school he gets harsher punishments than his peers. My husband when making minor mistakes at work gets pulled in to disciplinary meetings. For minor mistakes that you and I (if you are white) make every day.
I know it’s uncomfortable and awkward but do you understand that people are being murdered? And when people are being executed by the very people that should protect them, the ONLY response is OUTRAGE. White people in power murder and kill black people, and you want to say “if and but”. NO!!

@Hearhoovesthinkzebras if you don't get things immediately take time to reflect. It may take you months or even years (like someone I know) to understand.

@PatricksRum I wish I had better words to make my thoughts and feelings of support clearer. I want to scream, shout and make it all better. It’s just all so fucking awful

@Dreep kindly leave my thread.

Patrick’s rum

Realising that you don’t want me to ask this as you are understandably fed up of explains it other than the main BLM movement (already donated) is there a way to support that happening other than social Media posts that just seem to make people angry?

[quote BeforeIPutOnMyMakeup]@Hearhoovesthinkzebras if you don't get things immediately take time to reflect. It may take you months or even years (like someone I know) to understand.[/quote]
But that is difficult at the moment when we are all being told to act now and challenged if we post something on social media, or don't post on social media.

There's a thread currently running where the poster says that "silence is compliance" in relation to not posting on social media and she's called out some of her friends for not having participated in blackout Tuesday for example.

So, it feels like there's an urgency to understand and to act, now.

Clearly, this isn't the place to ask the questions but I'll keep trying to find someone willing to talk with me about it.

The first time my child was accused of having “a chip on his shoulder” he was two.

Someone said to me today, "I hope you find peace" I said "I will when we stop being killed by white people"
She said "You're killing Yourselves"

This is disgusting. 2 years old.

Imagine having ADHD and being black.

the ONLY response is OUTRAGE.
Simply put but simply great

Thank you but no.

You still haven’t answered my question.

@Dreep Please leave my thread.

No. Thank you.

I can’t get over how utterly shit it is, that a black woman comes here on Mumsnet and shares her thoughts and views on what is going on in the world. And people tell her that SHE is wrong!! This week of all weeks!! Come on, really? Have you been smoking something? Can you not just hear, listen and accept? Can you really not see that this is part of the problem? The gaslighting is really ugly to witness.

It isn't your thread OP. You started it yes, but it doesn't belong to you. It belongs to MN and everyone who provided the content by posting on it.

@Dreep are you BAME? I believe you said you were. Sorry if I am wrong but if I am not I confess to utter astonishment at seeing a BAME person be ordered to leave a discussion about racism.

Realising that you don’t want me to ask this
Please don't think this. You have asked questions in a polite, eager way. I have no problem with that. It's only when the same poster asks the same thing.

as you are understandably fed up of explains it other than the main BLM movement (already donated) is there a way to support that happening other than social Media posts that just seem to make people angry?
Listen.
Teach your children.
Evaluate your life, your thoughts your words.
Someone told me I looked like a gangster because I braided my hair. Potentially an innocent comment but think about it. It's racist.
Challenge racism. I don't just mean the obvious racism. This is where evaluation comes in. Britain has a horrible undertone of racism.

Indeed ygritte - it is fine though.

UHearhoovesthinkzebras if you don't get things immediately take time to reflect. It may take you months or even years (like someone I know) to understand.

This is another thing to do.
Listen listen listen until you understand (my) words and why.

Lndnmummy

That’s terrible that people would make assumptions about your child. I get your angry.
(And an aside Having ADHD can be great when you Get meds - if you can remember to take them)

“Your killing yourself” - what an evil evil person!