Queue argument....... who was right and who was wrong.......

[ACautionaryTale]

Socially distanced queue at the supermarket. I was number 3 in the queue, there were about 12 in total. its not a big one but not an express style either. Most people only get a basket of shopping nor a full weekly shop.

Relatively older lady joins the queue at the back. So number 13. did not look infirm or otherwise struggling. I'd say late sixties/early 70s.

Woman who was number 1 in the queue indicates to new joiner to join the queue at the front.

Several people object. Number 1 lady starts saying its only polite to the older generation,.

I politely point out that it was not her decision to make on behalf of everyone else in the queue. She did not get to decide for everyone else whether the lady could jump the queue.

I got told I had no social respect (and called a fat cunt for the privilege) and that older people should go first.

Older lady at the back looked embarrassed and pointed out she did not want to jump the queue.

Lady in position 1 left the store offing and blinding.

I went to the Express shop recently leaving dd7 sat in the front of the car which was next to the queue (single parent) As I was talking to her the person at the front said oh we'll swap places so you dont leave your dd for long.
At that the whole queue said no no you go in front.
I was so grateful as only needed milk and didn't want to take dd inside.
A little kindness goes a long way....

That older lady could be fitter and healthier in the queue!
Also how do you know those people ahead aren't carers themeslves?
If she wanted to let the lady go ahead so badly, she should have swapped places.
Yanbu and they are arseholes for calling you awful names.

"they are arseholes for calling you awful names"

Umm.....

I didn't make the fuss - I said what I did to try to explain to the woman in front why other people might be making a fuss.

You didn't start it, but you added to it.

And you didn't explain other people's reasons, you told her it wasn't her decision to make, from your OP.

Honestly with what’s happening right now are people actually getting annoyed about queuing?! Fucking hell.

Did anyone in the queue say they weren't able to wait or stand for a few more minutes?

Perhaps the older lady was happy to queue? A lot of older people purposely go to the shops when there are more people about despite having more time (in general). More so now when there is more time to feel lonely. That may not be the case, but the lady did not seem infirm as you pointed out and was embarrassed about the whole thing.

Number 1 lady sounds like a virtue signalling twit. As others have pointed out, she could have swapped places if she was so bothered. And being so rude. Just wow. This really has brought the worst out in some people. I hope you are OK OP, sounds like an unpleasant experience.

I’m an older woman and have no trouble standing and would decline an invitation to go in front. My 24 year old daughter looks in great health but would be in severe pain if she had to stand for any length of time. The lady in front had no idea of health of any one else in the queue and should not make decisions that cause them to wait for longer.

Ummm, what?

Calling someone a fat c*nt in real life is not the same thing as calling someone who I have never met or seen in real life an arsehole on an internet forum at all.

Anybody who calls you a fat cunt doesn't deserve a second more of your thoughts.

You were in the wrong for being so bothered about a small thing. You had no class to pipe up about someone trying to do a good dead.

You’re also the n the wrong for asking a load of strangers on the internet for back up in your righteousness. Get a life,

hmmm. I personally wouldn't mind letting an older person go first, but only if other queuers agreed. Some people may be in a rush for reasons you don't know and it's not ok to make an executive decision on their behalf.

I also don't think it's ok to call someone a fat cunt over this disagreement.

So I do broadly agree with OP here

If somebody was very frail looking I would have let them go ahead. If not I would have been annoyed..

It wasn’t person 1 decision to make for the rest of the queue.

When someone approaches me and asks to jump ahead. If no one is behind me and I can wait, I let them. When people are behind me, I tell them it’s fine by me, not sure about the others.

Reasons for why not are irrelevant.

this has brought out the petty, the bored and the psychotic. No, it's not down to anybody to organise queues.

What has your physique and gender got to do with it?

First because No1 was doing something thoughtful for someone older.
At the expense of everybody else in the queue!
Next time OP you'll know to start saying loudly, "that's nice of you to offer to swap places, No1. So public spirited!"

People talking about this woman being “elderly” - I appreciate 70ish isn’t the first flush of youth, but plenty of 70 year olds are perfectly healthy able to stand. It’s not like she was 90 and using walking aids.

I’m due to give birth in days and I absolutely don’t expect to go to the front of the queue. However I’m struggling with some pelvic girdle pain, my back is agony and struggling to hold my wee if I get the urge (which I would not have wanted to announce to the queue). I’ll wait my turn but I would be a bit narked at having to wait longer because someone who Is older than me but quite possibly currently Better able to stand than me was let in by someone else.

Wouldn’t have said anything but it isn’t as simple as people not wanting to do a kind thing.

Someone tried to do a nice thing for an older lady. You spat the dummy.

YWVU

I am in my 60s so not sure if that qualifies me as older but I would not expect to go to the front of the queue. Maybe you should have suggested the woman at the front swap with the older lady at position 13 as that would have been fairer and she would not unilaterally be deciding to give preference to someone on behalf of all the queuers. I don't think I would have said anything though and would not really have got worked up about it. Presumably it would only be a few minutes extra for everyone.

YANBU simply because it was unacceptable to call you a 'fat cunt'. There is never any excuse for that.

I would sworn back, OP, you were very restrained.

My mum is the age you mentioned...I think she would have appreciated it. You wouldn't know it to look at her though. It was a nice thing to do and I feel sorry for the poor lady.

Anyone else finding it hard to believe that someone, who's nice enough to let an elderly person join the queue in front of them, would suddenly call someone else a fat cunt out of the blue?

Not sure why the OP added that bit to the story. Or whether it matters at all.
The question was about the queue jumping.

My best line to queue jumpers

Do I look like a statue to you?
I must do, otherwise why would I be just standing around with basket/trolley/stuff on the counter.

@senua liking your thinking!