To think that people who don't do very much have almost got their lives back

[Ghostlyglow]

Certainly not judging those people, nothing wrong with a quiet life if that's what you enjoy.
Those of us who quite like to keep work life separate from home life and like to spend their leisure time attending gigs, going to the pub, travelling etc. have no light at the end of the tunnel yet.

Having gone from a decent salary to an entry-level one before covid-19 showed up, I'd already made the transition from someone who did stuff to someone who didn't. I've enjoyed the ROH's free live streamings, free access to National Archives stuff, virtual museum tours, lockdown-inspired youtube plays etc.

I hear you op 😞. Can't wait for the hustle and bustle to start again, it feels like the world has been asleep.

Seems like some angry people are determined to be judged

Maybe because you're blatantly judging them?

Your posts come across quite "well, my life was so exciting before so I'm missing out but you're okay because you're boring fucks who just stay at home all the time".

Those of us who quite like to keep work life separate from home life and like to spend their leisure time attending gigs, going to the pub, travelling etc. have no light at the end of the tunnel yet
Do you not think lots of people enjoy those things (or at least a mix of the two lifestyles) but are simply just making the most of what they do have during this time?
There’s no point dwelling on it or getting annoyed about it, you’ve been asked not to go to the pub/gigs for a few months, not take a vow of silence. You can still engage with people and enjoy things. I think some people just aren’t very creative with their time unless they actually have a specific event to go to.

I get your point OP but talking about keeping work and home separate, and going to the pub was probably not the best way to articulate it.

I know some people who have virtually got their lives back as their leisure is primarily immediate family based. Mine isn't, I'm a member of a choir, I do yoga classes, I play a sport and watch another in person. I have a group of uni friends who live in different cities, we meet every few months and tend to do activities like cooking courses. I won't feel life is back to normal until I can do those things which will likely be a while.

No criticism of anyone's preferences just that return to normality will be different for everyone.

On a different thread I mentioned what it would mean for our lives to go back to normal - and browsing shops in not sth I miss, the things I miss as a rule do not involve money:
meet family - we had a reunion planned
theatre - my DN woks in one and with children
church services
choirs listening and singing - DSIS founded one, DD wanted to join her uni's choir this semester
community celebrations (schools, museums, parishes, fête de la musique, etc.)
pubs
literary meetings that take place in pubs (DH's work depends on that)
lectures and readings in book shops (DH's work again)
courses and workshops
football
in short:
everything that involves close contact with other people - as I said I am an ape after all!

I’m not a sociable person at all. I do enjoy gigs, but was already going to fewer before lockdown due to costs, and I often went by myself or with just DP anyway. Festivals too. We used to go to arboretums, gardens and NT a lot.

I’ve been working throughout lockdown, as has DP. We’ve also had the DC off school - so trying to juggle homeschooling with wfh.

Tbh, I feel fine about it all. We all have a multitude of interests and hobbies that aren’t solely reliant on going out and socialising, so where we might be going to fewer gigs or NT properties, we’ve more time for instruments, studying, needlework, painting, woodwork etc. The only real issue is juggling wfh and schooling, which is really independent of what you do with your spare time.

Life’s far from how it was before, but you adapt.

What's the point in this, OP? My term has finished now (I'm doing a degree), other than 2 submissions. I've loved having the children home with me more and could easily facilitate it. I can't see my family, as they're all 80+ or shielding, but we've taken up writing letters, which is lovely. I don't see many friends in general, so there's little difference there and I like to walk in the woods year round and spend every summer outside wherever possible. There's little difference in my life right now, other than the children off school (though they would be soon for summer holidays anyway), shopping queues and a bit more effort to put in to entertaining the kids. I miss my grandparents company, but other than that, yes, my life is happy and normal.

Did that make you feel better? I doubt it... it's a wierd thread premise, like you're trying to be goady, but are ultimately goading yourself.

Nrtft but presume you also mean those who wfh have the work infringing on home life rather than a clean break, evening and weekends. As far as life in general mine hasn't changed. I've still got the same problems I had before, and still will have when things are supposedly 'back to normal'.

It is crap for us all in one way or another.

I miss my work in the community, working from home is not for me. I don't go out often to socialise as having children, a full time job and studying a full time course hasn't left a great deal of time.

I still miss seeing my friends, or just having the option of doing so. I miss being able to go into the city centre to look around the shops and I really miss my hairdresser. I might not be a social butterfly but I like having the option to do those things.

I tell you what I find really difficult.. everything is a big effort. Going to the garden centre to go to the fish shop is a bloody chore. I went the other day and what usually would be a 15 minute job took over an hour and a half. With queuing to get into the garden centre, then queuing to get into the fish section etc. It's bloody time consuming. I just want to be able to walk straight into a shop.

It is hard for us all, no matter how you like to spend your leisure time.

Due to my illness I have been someone who is out and about a lot and also been someone who stays at home and does nothing. I reserve my concern for those not coping not seeing people for two months or dealing with having to stay at home and it making them truly suffer. It often shows that the keeping busy was keeping something else at bay even if they were not aware.

I have done everything you do at times in my life but the way you write seems a little sneery. My SIL is very like you in that what she likes doing she considers the pinnacle of sociability and anything else is just not interesting.

My life changed very little because i have a child who has severe enough ASD that we were unable to access so many things anyway. In fact people and organisations have made more effort to include us than ever before.

It's a bit of a harsh judgement to assume that people who don't spend their leisure time on gigs/pubs/travel are people who don't do anything. There are many pleasures that make people's lives rich beyond handing over money to someone else to provide stimulation.

Most people fall into the category of enjoying both; whether their stimulation comes from the looud and bustling pub/gig/city break or other activities like the Chelsea Flower Show, theaters, sporting events, games nights, visiting stately homes, volunteering, visiting friends or family across the country - many people are missing out on what makes their lives richer. However, people who have a balance and are able to enjoy the simpler things in life and finding their joy where they can get it. Crafting, walking, sunsets, TV, radio, cycling, reading, gardening. That makes people far from boring. Quite the contrary.

It is expensive to travel, eat out, go to see live music. These are things many people only do a few times per year so it is easier to do without them. I miss restaurants and not having a holiday and not seeing my distant family for a BBQ and theatre and sporting events. But they were a more sporadic part of my life so I am putting them out of my mind for now, knowing they will come back and looking to enjoy what I can. Easier on some days than others.

I couldn't imagine anything worse than filling my free time with gigs/pubs/rushing around, I love the homely life but I'm certainly not content that I can't bring my children to the beach or visit my parents or go on our annual holiday in Spain. I think maybe, your post was trying to come accross as if you need to tell people that you have a very interesting life, but I'm sorry op, it has only come accross that you are very unsure about your life and unfilled with your need to be busy to be content, maybe it could be helpful to you to use this lockdown time to reassess your life and what really makes you happy

Ghostlyglow retaining a young outlook is one thing, but there's nothing good in being a Peter Pan incapable of entertaining himself if mummy's not around and all your after school clubs are cancelled. You're the one trapped by your own lack of resources surely? No light at the end of the tunnel for the deliberately over scheduled kid who never had to get creative when bored, so never learned to cope...

I had a quiet life and yet anything I used to enjoy has disappeared and I suspect won’t reappear until well into 2021. So I don’t think it’s people who like pubs and gigs who are the ones waiting it out.

I just miss being able to go out with Dh without the kids. Don't care what we go and do, just want a night off parenting.

Surely everyone thinks that the things they choose to do in their lives (and I'm talking about choice here not things in your life that you can't change) are the best things to do though.
It seems my leisure time choices weren't best suited to a global pandemic...
Anyway this has been quite fun. Maybe I have a new hobby 🤔😈

It does sound judgy, I’m an introvert I love being home, don’t like socialising, love my shopping delivery and don’t do holidays (I get home sick) etc so my life hasn’t changed really. But I see the effect it has in my son and I really want to be able to take him to school, cubs, swimming etc. I can’t be content until he’s happy.

Other than not being able to get a subway my life has barely changed.

Agree. The inlaws don't do anything, ever. Never go for days out, never have a meal out, never go to events, or museums or the theatre or anything. The highlight of their week is a trip to Sainsburys so for them it's the same as it always has been.

I'm not a gig person but we usually do something every weekend, whether it's a trip to a country park for walk and a coffee, visit to a museum, using our national trust membership, going out for lunch, cinema... we can't do any of that.

I kind of agree. I’ve been fortunate to be semi insulated from the effects of corona. I already home educated my school age dc, so although we miss groups, activities, and meeting up with friends, our academics have continued as normal. I don’t work due to disability, so I haven’t had to juggle that, or deal with furlough and a loss of income. I’m an introvert who enjoys Netflix and crochet. I’ve even enjoyed socialising over zoom from the comfort of my couch!
So yes, I’m aware that for a lot of people, and a lot of reasons, lockdown has been way tougher for some people than it has for me.

It doesn't feel anywhere near to normal,to me, and I don't have a particularly busy life and happy in my own company, etc.

But things are far from normal:

Dd should be doing A levels, followed by parties and enjoying being with friends, mixed with some work experience - they're not happening and she can only see friends from a distance

Dh should normally be at work 8am til 7pm 5 days a week - he's currently going into work half a day a week and wfh the rest, sat at the same table as me most of the time. By the end of the ,moth he ,at have increased to 2 days a week in the office but again, that's not the norm for us at all.

I should be back teaching but can't do that ether as I'm classed as clinically vulnerable. So I'm working from home 5 days a week, and the nature of the job means it encroaches very much in to the weekends and holidays. Even if I could go back to work it would be to a very different set up - small classes, no mixing, caring from a distance, etc.

This past week I should have been at a funeral - but restrictions means I was sent a video link instead (which didn't even work in the end) and when my parents called round after the funeral we weren't to hug one another. Teen dd wasn't supposed to give her grandparents a hug after lot seeing them for months . Really we shouldn't have even seen them together, or in our garden. My family live further away so can't do in a day very easily so not seen them since January time!

I'd normally be away this week - half term - either on holiday or, this weekend, it should be in London at a wedding. I'd normally be planning the final bits for a summer holiday but can't be doing that now. I'd be planning for holidays later in the year too but now can't get excited about October half term's booked holiday as it may well not,go ahead.

Seeing friends over video just isn't the same. We are excited that one set of friends are coming for a bbq in the garden next week - but we know that officially we are breaking the rules as there is one extra person (we can get round if it need be and have the three teens go,to the park whilst the four adults chat in the garden) and it's all got to be done from further away. But other friends we haven't seen for ages and no idea when we will as many aren't do I able in the day.

I've lost essential medical care and treatment due to lockdown - none of which I'll be able to access again due to injury that wasn't treated and has got so bad I can't get into a car even when it does restart.

I lost socialising years ago to my illness.

I’m not sure about ‘don’t do much’. My DH would argue that he pretty much has his life back, but he works 12 hour days, looks after his horse, runs etc. I’m sure you are referring so much to ‘doesn’t do much’, but rather, whose lives don’t centre around socially focused activities.