Not speaking to friend because she saw boyfriend.

[FeistyOne]

A bit peed off with my friend. Her and her boyfriend live seperately but the past week have been visiting each other's houses and going on walks.
I think this is a bit hypocritical since from March until now she has been moaning that people need to follow lockdown so life can go back to normal.
I messaged her saying cant believe people are breaking lockdown and using cummings as an excuse and she said that the past week she has been going on walks and seeing him because she hasnt seen him for 3 months and couldnt cope any longer.

I think it's selfish. They live 20 minutes away from each other and risking things just because they miss each other

@Fluffybutter so people can't tell her she's being unreasonable (in their opinion) without being nasty?

being a bit down because you haven’t seen your partner for a few weeks doesn’t constitute depression anyway

Minimising again...

I was an absolute state. I'd not been touched by another human since 23rd March. I wasn't "a bit down"
How dare you.
If drinking to excess to try and numb myself every night is "a bit down" I dread to think what I'd have done if I was actually, y'know depressed.

Depressed

(of a person) in a state of unhappiness or despondency.
"she felt lonely and depressed"

so am I.. feel free to not talk to me either.

We went from seeing each other 2-3 times a week, to avoiding each other for 8 weeks, then thought.. fuck it. He is furloughed, as is his flat mate. They only go out to buy food once a week, same as me.

We meet up for 3 hours once a week.. and quite frankly, its helped both of our mental health immensely.

People like you piss me off. Not seeing your boyfriend/partner for what would now be going on 10 weeks with no end in sight is torture.

I'm just glad our bond lasted the test of only speaking online/over the phone for that long... he is the only one I have 'broke lockdown' for.

Yesterday before the announcement, I met with 6 friends in a garden for a small baby shower and to see (not hold!) a friends baby-she had the baby in lockdown.
We socially distanced, brought our own juice and didn’t go to the toilet. Let in through the back gate. We all loved it, all said how good mentally it was to see each other face to face and just laugh and talk shit in the sunshine.

It wasn’t a want by that point, it was a need for all of us, in different ways mentally.

If I was your friend OP I’d honestly be glad you were ignoring me for it!

@MrMeeseekscando sorry to hear it. You should actually call your GP and get some help as this strongly suggests a previous underlying cause, not just missing loved ones due to lockdown.

@Bathbedandbeyond
Thanks for your uninvited advice.
I'll be ignoring it.

@MrMeeseekscando If there's one thing I've learnt from all this, its that people really don't actually give a fuck about mental health. I'm sure someone will tell me that poor mental health "doesn't kill people", but as someone who lost both parents to MH issues (one suicide, one MH-related alcoholism) by the time I was twenty-three my answer will be "yes it fucking does". And yes my childhood was unusually shit, but suicide is still one of the biggest - the biggest? - killer of young men.

Tagged the wrong person
Apologises bedbathandbeyond!

She's not 'breaking lockdown' though, you're allowed to meet someone from outside of the household for a walk?

Am I missing something? You are allowed to meet one other person in a public place to walk or sit in a park. The friend is not even breaking lockdown.

There's mental illness- genuine and very legitimate and needs to be taken seriously- and then there's everyday sadness and low mood due to circumstances, which everyone experiences from time to time and especially at the moment!! Do you not think there's a difference? Is there not a danger of people mistakenly self-diagnosing? Does that not detract from people who really do need help? @MrMeeseekscando you are obviously one of those people who genuinely does need help, and it would be better to do that than be nasty to strangers online.

@SomewhereEast
Exactly.
I generally only struggle if I feel unloved. The most important thing to me is my partner, the rest of my life could turn to utter shit, but if I have someone to hug me and tell me it's ok I can cope with absolutely anything. (And I have. My life has been very challenging at times the same as you)
We find our coping mechanisms and get on with things.
Remove that coping mechanism and suddenly things become very bleak.

@DHMB20 ODFOD

Not a big deal at all, definitely overreacting.

@MrMeeseekscando YAAMWTTWWIAT

I never agreed with this not seeing partners bollocks.

I wonder how many people screeching "Stick to the RULES or people will DIE!" have l lived alone for the past 8 weeks and not seen anyone at a closer distance than 2 metres?

I’m going to hug my parents when I go over to stay next week.

MrMeeseekscando @DHMB20 WTF??

Messed that up

MrMeeseekscando YAAMWTTWWIAT

@DHMB20 WTF does that mean?

@DHMB20

Obviously loads of legitimate MH issues because of lockdown

Ah. Presumably very few people on this particular thread fall into your 'legitimate' category, then, given that you are minimising most of ours. If you cba to 'advanced search' my posts, you will see that my MH has suffered as a direct result of lockdown. I am not the only one.

Your posts are coming across as rather unpleasant.

You sound delightful.

@understandmenow nope didn't mess it up, you need to brush up on your acronyms!

@celan I'm ok with you thinking I'm unpleasant, you don't know me. I haven't got an opinion on the legitimacy of the MH issues of anyone in particular on this thread, apart from someone who says they are drinking themselves numb, because I don't know any details and I wouldn't like to presume. I've been careful to take a very general approach to what I've said about MH as I know it's a touchy subject. I have my own experiences with MH, as do most people. I'll be unwatching the thread now because it's taking up too much time (and probably annoying the OP), so there's no point in replying. Having an online argument with strangers feels totally ridiculous, certainly don't intend on doing it again.

@DHMB20 nope I meant I messed that up, you need to brush up on your ATTD!

I posted the question again, slow the rage, calm down and RTFT?

@DHMB20 I asked you wtf it meant, do you have comprehension issues?