You tube influencer "rehomes" adopted son

[quizacabusi81]

Myka Stauffer a popular YouTube and Instagram influencer raised considerable funds to adopt a child from China, the child a boy she called Huxley had brain damage, non verbal autism and behavioural difficulties. Myka has 4 biological children and adopted 4 year Huxley 18 months ago.

After quite some time of not posting anything about him and after repeated questions from her "followers" she recently uploaded a video where in her words she's "rehomed him" and he was with people much more able and suited to deal with his complex needs.

The main issue people have is the money she raised for his adoption and the secrecy regarding this at one point one of her followers noticed that she had put a video up of her repainting his room and turning it into her daughters room with no mention of him.

Apparently it was like she wanted people to forgot she has ever adopted him and people are furious.

I can see both sides as it must have been a complex and difficult decision especially if they couldn't meet his needs. She had to consider her other children... one a small baby but on the other hand she wasn't very transparent about it...

Also there are allegations of her using duct tape on his hands and I have seen a video of her mocking him because of his meltdowns so hopefully he is now with people more suited to his needs.

Thoughts?

I have 2 children with ASD that is why they are home educated

Can be *

This is the saddest thing I have read. That poor poor child.

that poor boy
i hope he gets all the help he needs all his life.

No judgment at all for the adoption breaking down. It is really common.

It DOES however sound like some questions need to be asked about how and why the adoption was entered into in the first place.

It sounds like the whole thing was poorly managed and that the parents did not have a clear idea of why they were doing this or how hard it would be to take care of this child; the impression here is that they were buying into this appealing sob story for sentimental reasons, hoping their fans would lap it up. The US has pretty lax adoption regulations compared to the UK, especially certain states.

adoption in US sounds terrible.

It’s an individual thing though isn’t it what is right for one asd child may not be right for any other in the world
That’s why I said I can’t judge her and at least she saw the situation needing changing. The phrasing wasn’t thought out well though which probably hasn’t helped.
It’s hard as well as these videos are just a snippet of a moment in time it doesn’t tell Is everything my assumption just was they seemed to be doing things V differently but perhaps it was professionally advised and my take on a situation is only my take on it, it’s hard and a shame all round I think

She's a fuckin arsehole.
it shouldn't be allowed.
Children should not be a financial commodity, that should have ended in the magdalen laundry.

Do they have learning disabilities though,? because Autism as I'm sure your aware is a huge spectrum ,for many children with autism home education might be the best thing,but often for children with autism and severe learning disabilities who.are also non verbal a special.educational setting is the best thing ,speaking on behalf of my own child he gets so much more input from his special school than I could give him.

Why weren't the "fans" asking questions when this adopt-a-child-from-China caper first began?

Surely it should have occurred to someone that a person with FOUR children already would probably not be in a good position to adopt a child with such complex needs.

Asd and asd with severe learning disabilities are different things. I know lots who home educate the former but don't know anyone personally who home educates the latter apart from children who have been excluded.

I would be unsure of their particular issues are LD? Both asd one has PDA and ARFID and v high IQ the other has severe speech difficulties but again high IQ so I don’t know if that is actually LD due to IQ. Both need v different approaches though

Yes as I said what is right for one child with asd is precisely that , right for that one child hence why I wasn’t judging her just wondering ...but you don’t knelt he full story from YouTube nobody knows unless you’re there 24/7

Know the full story even ....

The more i read the more sickened i am www.mirror.co.uk/3am/celebrity-news/youtuber-accused-taping-autistic-sons-22100368

The only saving grace is that if she thinks like this, the poor boy is better off out of there! Appalling behaviour!

I don't judge her for struggling & understand that adoptions don't always work out.

I judge her for using the poor child as clickbait & for financial gains & then trying to erase him as if he never existed.

Why weren't the "fans" asking questions when this adopt-a-child-from-China caper first began?

The ones that did were probably blocked & called #haters 🙄

This woman is a monster. A narcissist virtue-signaller who just removed her son from the narrative. I think what a think about her would get me banned from here.

In the US there is a fashion of very large families adopting additional children from abroad. Sometimes it is a display of wealth or to virtue signal, other times, even more darkly, it is part of the 'quiverful' movement which is terrifying and has resulted in several deaths.

This is a horrifying account of several families callous attitudes to their adoptive children:
www.motherjones.com/politics/2013/04/christian-evangelical-adoption-liberia/

And don't forget these monsters:eu.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2019/11/07/ukraine-child-adoption-natalia-grace-barnett-tells-dr-phil-her-story/2517608001/

I watched about 30 seconds of her announcement on YouTube about how hard this has been for her and her grateful she is to so many of her followers, who have been so amazing and supportive throughout this difficult time for her.

I have no words.

'rehomed'😲
I suppose he's lucky she didn't have him 'put to sleep'

I don't judge the failure of the adoption. It happens more commonly than many people realise.

However, the Stauffers profited from the child by depicting their adoption 'journey' on their monetised YouTube channel, picking up a lot of additional subscribers along the way. I hope that the boy's new family are in a position to advocate for him to have some portion of this money placed in trust to fund the lifelong care and therapy that he will likely need.

Her poor kids

They will think that if they misbehave. Or she says they are misbehaving. That it means they will give them away

How incredibly sad. I know of adoptions that go wrong. But it’s usually within the first few weeks. Maybe months. Not years!!!

There’s a screenshot circulating (I am annoyed I can’t find it to share) that was allegedly posted by the father asking if some SENDs are seen as more difficult to “deal with” than they actually are and which ones.

If true, I read it as him asking “which disability can we adopt to make us look good without having to do much work?”

Disgusting. If I come across the screenshot again I will add it to this thread.

Sounds like a stunt - get a child from China - get lots of followers - get lots of sponsorship deals - find child difficult to parent so move child on (rehome) then continue to post expecting lots of sympathy and poor you.....

Stop 'following' these people - so glad I don't 'do' twitter/youtube/instagram and the fake ridiculous following